Having A Child

Michelle - perfectly said.

Thanks

Why my words are being used in a post that has nothing to do with me is just not fair. I wrote a heartfelt, truthful post about MY feelings about my birth experience. I am not going to aplogize for the words I used.

The situation described above is nothing less than HORRIFIC. Cheated is way toooo weak a word to use.

The feelings I have over a very sensative and personal issue were shared with all of you because I thought I could be honest and open. Now it turns out that my words about MY feelings are being used to hurt me and make me feel bad about having them. Claudine told me that she was shocked that I shared so much private information about how I felt here since I am not a very open person with many people. And now I truly regret it. I thought I could trust my inner feelings and thoughts with everyone in this group, because I consider you friends, not just Internet friends and now I know that I cannot. I will never, ever post about my experience again.

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Posted by michele31

Why my words are being used in a post that has nothing to do with me is just not fair. I wrote a heartfelt, truthful post about MY feelings about my birth experience. I am not going to aplogize for the words I used.

The situation described above is nothing less than HORRIFIC. Cheated is way toooo weak a word to use.

The feelings I have over a very sensative and personal issue were shared with all of you because I thought I could be honest and open. Now it turns out that my words about MY feelings are being used to hurt me and make me feel bad about having them. Claudine told me that she was shocked that I shared so much private information about how I felt here since I am not a very open person with many people. And now I truly regret it. I thought I could trust my inner feelings and thoughts with everyone in this group, because I consider you friends, not just Internet friends and now I know that I cannot. I will never, ever post about my experience again.

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Please don't say never, b/c then we all get cheated when people do not share. We need to hear all sides. I send you many hugs for your hurt feelings. I agree you are 100% entitled to feeling how you do.

Well said Shamma!! I agree-- We are supposed to ALL be honest and open here... Please Michele dont stop posting your feelings. We all learn and grow from each other!

I think it is very unfair for any of us to compare our experiences, regardless of how easy or difficult they were, with those felt by others. Everyone has their own cross to bear and no one person's problems are more difficult than another's.
When I found out I was pregnant I cried for 3 days, not because I was happy, but because I wasn't ready to be a mother. To say my pregnancy took me by surprise would be an understatement. Does this make me a horrible, ungrateful person? Perhaps to some, but I think it only makes me human. I reacted the way I naturally felt and my reaction was based on my own personal circumstances at the time. Noone else has the right to tell me how I should or shouldn't have felt. The fact that I now consider myself the luckiest person in the world to be having this baby doesn't change what I felt back then.
We will all take very different roads towards becoming mothers and I think we owe each woman her own experience and the ability to have her own emotions throughout this experience.
Good luck to all those who are already mommies, to those TTC and to those who are waiting to have their babies!

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Posted by DKA1026

I think it is very unfair for any of us to compare our experiences, regardless of how easy or difficult they were, with those felt by others. Everyone has their own cross to bear and no one person's problems are more difficult than another's.
When I found out I was pregnant I cried for 3 days, not because I was happy, but because I wasn't ready to be a mother. To say my pregnancy took me by surprise would be an understatement. Does this make me a horrible, ungrateful person? Perhaps to some, but I think it only makes me human. I reacted the way I naturally felt and my reaction was based on my own personal circumstances at the time. Noone else has the right to tell me how I should or shouldn't have felt. The fact that I now consider myself the luckiest person in the world to be having this baby doesn't change what I felt back then.
We will all take very different roads towards becoming mothers and I think we owe each woman her own experience and the ability to have her own emotions throughout this experience.
Good luck to all those who are already mommies, to those TTC and to those who are waiting to have their babies!

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Very well said. And what words someone chooses to describe their feelings I feel is their choice. We should all Respect each other's feelings.

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Posted by DKA1026
but I think it only makes me human

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I think this is what we have to remember...while humans are one of the few animals that have the ability to be rational...we are also one of the only that also have the ability to be irrational...


we must take risks in life...otherwise it is not worth living (IMO) if we never know sadness...how can we appreciate happiness?


friendship (and I hope that I can consider many of you my friends) is about risk taking...it is about sharing...it is about disagreeing...and yes it is about arguing

I really don't want to add fuel to this hot topic/thread but I don't want Michelle31 (or anyone else) to feel like any of this is a personal attack. I really think this thread is to just open up a second point of view -- a way of viewing your (and others) experience in a different light -- with different perspective.

I think when we post things on this board we are leaving ourselves open for being critcized, praised, appreciated, etc and we have to be all right with that.

You can't predict how someone is going to react to something you post. Some of us will read a new mommy's posts and feel sad and hurt that we can't experience those same things or we are defensive b/c while you hurt inside from your experience (joyful none the less that you have a healthy child) we can't even have that joy.

BUT at the same time someone else maybe reading it and is so thankful b/c they are going through the same thing. If one person benefited or felt comforted reading your post -- knowing they aren't the only ones that feel that way -- then you've helped someone.

So please don't feel like you can't post -- but that is of course up to you to decide.

Demetra your entire statement was very well said.

Michele, while I understand both viewpoints and personally hope not to feel disappointed if I should have a c-section....I want you to know that what you shared is extremely personal and I thank you for sharing an experience so deeply meaningful to you.

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Posted by DKA1026

When I found out I was pregnant I cried for 3 days, not because I was happy, but because I wasn't ready to be a mother.

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I did the same, and up until I took that test, I thought I WAS ready.

It took me a week or so to come to grips emotionally. I think it was the permanence of it all...

Michele, I agree with the others. There's no reason for you to stop posting your feelings. We still respect and care for you.

Besides... we all love Molly pictures.