honestly.

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Posted by xXxNovember08xXx

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Posted by Jesses Girl

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Posted by Shell84

I don't know why people gets upset really.
You choose where to have your wedding and who to invite. You don't do it hoping to get your money back. Maybe it's just me, but I'll be more than happy if anyone decides to give me an envelope, but i am not waiting on it.

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see my point is that we gave them MORE at their weddings

A LOT MORE

you usually give what you get, no?

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that is a general rule for me and my family... maybe its different for them... there always are those few that just dont get it... (i have a cousin that regifts.. and i dont expect anythign from her.. shes my moms first cousin)

just some ppl dont get it... im so sorry diane =(

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thanks...i knew id get a few people to attack me on this.

and im puttin this out there bc its true...u dont expect to ake back what you spend..that is not why im having my wedding where i am..i love it and feel it will be special... everyone I invite i want to have a great time and enjoy themselves.

however...when you know 2 yrs in advance that you are attending a wedding would you not put some $ on the side for a gift?

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Posted by ChristineAaron08

Just hope other people make up for it. Its ridiculous and you are not rude at all.

I know the wedding isnt about making $, but that is ridiculous. Especially when like u said- they are not poor and knew about the wedding for a year. (put $10 a week away or something- sheesh)

I have heard that the going rate/ettiquette is $75 - $85 pp. I usualy give more at weddings b/c I know ppl pay more than $85 pp to have me there.
I could see $50 pp MAYBE, but for 4 ppl.

My sister had friends (and family on DH side) come and give NOTHING. Not even a card. One of his relatves said they forgot the card at home. I'm sorry but if I forgot the card, I would run to the nearest CvS and get on the way.

Im sorry they did that to your brother. Is your brother going to say anything?

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not sure...he prob wont..be we dont want to ruffle the feathers.

thank you for understanding...

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Posted by Jesses Girl

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Posted by FutureMrs.T

You dont have a wedding to make money...JMHO

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Im not sayin they are their to make money...

MY OPINION

my problem is that 3 out of the 4 adults have been married once OR twice...and have received gifts from us

HONESTLY.

would you give 20$ (not 25 my mom corrected me) from u and FH if u went to a wedding

or if u, ur bro and ur 2 kids went..would u give 50$?

ESP when everyone knows u have money

cmon? im not singling you out...

this ? is for EVERYONE.

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I personally would not. I generally give between $300-$500 for my fiance and I. It is just my opinion though, that you dont throw a wedding to receive gifts, those are the added bonus. You shouldnt judge your special day by how much money you make and let it upset you when you dont make that much money....it takes away from your day.

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Posted by Jesses Girl

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Posted by xXxNovember08xXx

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Posted by Jesses Girl

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Posted by Shell84

I don't know why people gets upset really.
You choose where to have your wedding and who to invite. You don't do it hoping to get your money back. Maybe it's just me, but I'll be more than happy if anyone decides to give me an envelope, but i am not waiting on it.

---

see my point is that we gave them MORE at their weddings

A LOT MORE

you usually give what you get, no?

---

that is a general rule for me and my family... maybe its different for them... there always are those few that just dont get it... (i have a cousin that regifts.. and i dont expect anythign from her.. shes my moms first cousin)

just some ppl dont get it... im so sorry diane =(

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thanks...i knew id get a few people to attack me on this.

and im puttin this out there bc its true...u dont expect to ake back what you spend..that is not why im having my wedding where i am..i love it and feel it will be special... everyone I invite i want to have a great time and enjoy themselves.

however...when you know 2 yrs in advance that you are attending a wedding would you not put some $ on the side for a gift?

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maybe.... maybe... they will make it up for the holidays?!

*wishful thinking*

you are righ IMO to start saving... even to put in 100$ , diane remamber we are thinking with our rational... we HAVE beyond common decency, and i kno you do... and i kno its beyond the $ issue... you love JImmy, and u just wish the best for him for the future....

will he mention something?

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

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I agree....people may act like they have money and really be in financial trouble or use a lot of credit cards, etc. You just shouldnt expect things from people.....you will only be let down! Go into your wedding wanting your guests to have a good time, not to bring you gifts and money.

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

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my one cuzin is a park ranger...her husband is a teacher. they gave 20$

my other cousin sold her bar...works in the medical field and bartends when she has time.

the other adult that my cousin (bartender) paid for...works FULL TIME

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Posted by FutureMrs.T

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

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I agree....people may act like they have money and really be in financial trouble or use a lot of credit cards, etc. You just shouldnt expect things from people.....you will only be let down! Go into your wedding wanting your guests to have a good time, not to bring you gifts and money.

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i just said that above.
that is really all we want. is for people to enjoy themselves. but 10$ a person?

would u NOT be shocked if someone did that?
honestly?

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Posted by Jesses Girl

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

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my one cuzin is a park ranger...her husband is a teacher. they gave 20$

my other cousin sold her bar...works in the medical field and bartends when she has time.

the other adult that my cousin (bartender) paid for...works FULL TIME

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i totally understand..and if it was me..i would be really upset..... lol...but you just really never know the debt behind people.....

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Posted by FutureMrs.T

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

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I agree....people may act like they have money and really be in financial trouble or use a lot of credit cards, etc. You just shouldnt expect things from people.....you will only be let down! Go into your wedding wanting your guests to have a good time, not to bring you gifts and money.

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I agree 100% FH and I are paying for our wedding on our own and we dont care if we dont get a penny back...honest...Some people feel differently

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Posted by Fall Bride 2008

People who arent from NY usually do that because thats what they do outside of the city so I have herd..Are they from NY ?????

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they were born here...then moved.

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Posted by Jesses Girl

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Posted by FutureMrs.T

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

---

I agree....people may act like they have money and really be in financial trouble or use a lot of credit cards, etc. You just shouldnt expect things from people.....you will only be let down! Go into your wedding wanting your guests to have a good time, not to bring you gifts and money.

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i just said that above.
that is really all we want. is for people to enjoy themselves. but 10$ a person?

would u NOT be shocked if someone did that?
honestly?

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I would be shocked, but would not make a big deal about it or tell anyone else in the family to embarass them. Like I said before, you never know when someone who may or may not have money is having financial hardship. I would not want the family to start gossiping about how little money they gave at the wedding, because it also would make me look ungrateful to my family. JMHO.

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Posted by Jesses Girl

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

---

my one cuzin is a park ranger...her husband is a teacher. they gave 20$

my other cousin sold her bar...works in the medical field and bartends when she has time.

the other adult that my cousin (bartender) paid for...works FULL TIME

---

I agree, if u know u are going to a wedding, you should be prepared to give a gift. ESPECIALLY since you gave these people $100 pp. Don't people write these things down. I will keep track of what I ppl give to me b/c I want to give an equal gift at least at their weddings.

It doesnt even seem like its a matter of not having $ with them. I think they are just clueless on etiquette.

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Posted by Fall Bride 2008

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Posted by FutureMrs.T

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

---

I agree....people may act like they have money and really be in financial trouble or use a lot of credit cards, etc. You just shouldnt expect things from people.....you will only be let down! Go into your wedding wanting your guests to have a good time, not to bring you gifts and money.

---

I agree 100% FH and I are paying for our wedding on our own and we dont care if we dont get a penny back...honest...Some people feel differently

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ok this is ridiculous.

you wouldnt care if you got 1 penny back?
im not tryin to be a bit ch but be realistic..
if u paid say 30grand or higher for a wedding and received nothing in return you would be fine with it?

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Posted by ChristineAaron08

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Posted by Jesses Girl

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

---

my one cuzin is a park ranger...her husband is a teacher. they gave 20$

my other cousin sold her bar...works in the medical field and bartends when she has time.

the other adult that my cousin (bartender) paid for...works FULL TIME

---

I agree, if u know u are going to a wedding, you should be prepared to give a gift. ESPECIALLY since you gave these people $100 pp. Don't people write these things down. I will keep track of what I ppl give to me b/c I want to give an equal gift at least at their weddings.

It doesnt even seem like its a matter of not having $ with them. I think they are just clueless on etiquette.

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YEAH!! Payback is a bItcHH

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Posted by Jesses Girl

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Posted by Fall Bride 2008

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Posted by FutureMrs.T

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

---

I agree....people may act like they have money and really be in financial trouble or use a lot of credit cards, etc. You just shouldnt expect things from people.....you will only be let down! Go into your wedding wanting your guests to have a good time, not to bring you gifts and money.

---

I agree 100% FH and I are paying for our wedding on our own and we dont care if we dont get a penny back...honest...Some people feel differently

---

ok this is ridiculous.

you wouldnt care if you got 1 penny back?
im not tryin to be a bit ch but be realistic..
if u paid say 30grand or higher for a wedding and received nothing in return you would be fine with it?

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I would be fine with it. I am not throwing a wedding to get money...I am throwing a wedding to celebrate my marriage. The money is already spent and everyone had a good time....if we made no money on the event...we still had the best day of our lives....

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Posted by FutureMrs.T

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Posted by Jesses Girl

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Posted by Fall Bride 2008

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Posted by FutureMrs.T

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

---

I agree....people may act like they have money and really be in financial trouble or use a lot of credit cards, etc. You just shouldnt expect things from people.....you will only be let down! Go into your wedding wanting your guests to have a good time, not to bring you gifts and money.

---

I agree 100% FH and I are paying for our wedding on our own and we dont care if we dont get a penny back...honest...Some people feel differently

---

ok this is ridiculous.

you wouldnt care if you got 1 penny back?
im not tryin to be a bit ch but be realistic..
if u paid say 30grand or higher for a wedding and received nothing in return you would be fine with it?

---

I would be fine with it. I am not throwing a wedding to get money...I am throwing a wedding to celebrate my marriage. The money is already spent and everyone had a good time....if we made no money on the event...we still had the best day of our lives....

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Posted by FutureMrs.T

I would be shocked, but would not make a big deal about it or tell anyone else in the family to embarass them. Like I said before, you never know when someone who may or may not have money is having financial hardship. I would not want the family to start gossiping about how little money they gave at the wedding, because it also would make me look ungrateful to my family. JMHO.

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ok but my problem is...that they GAVE ME more at my eparty...which is a party that really..who cares if u get a gift. that was a party to just come and celebrate...no gift required

i didnt want to post that but thats the problem! even tho it wasnt much more..it was more. and that is my problem.

i dont think he is ungrateful..bc NONE of us are like that at all.

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Posted by angl2001

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Posted by ChristineAaron08

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Posted by Jesses Girl

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Posted by Mizzdimple

are you sure they have money.....you really never know sometimes...

---

my one cuzin is a park ranger...her husband is a teacher. they gave 20$

my other cousin sold her bar...works in the medical field and bartends when she has time.

the other adult that my cousin (bartender) paid for...works FULL TIME

---

I agree, if u know u are going to a wedding, you should be prepared to give a gift. ESPECIALLY since you gave these people $100 pp. Don't people write these things down. I will keep track of what I ppl give to me b/c I want to give an equal gift at least at their weddings.

It doesnt even seem like its a matter of not having $ with them. I think they are just clueless on etiquette.

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YEAH!! Payback is a bItcHH

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I disagree...

If my cousin comes to me (which has already happened) and says Im sorry but I really cant afford to come to your wedding, financially I cannot attend. Im definatley 100% hands down going to say ARE YOU NUTS< you better be there you are my family.

I dont expect money from people. And I think every bride will have a big wakeup call once they count their envelopes.

IMO