I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

olechka1911 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:38 PM

I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

Hi girls

I just need to vent. We just came back from our RH. We were paying our final balance today, and, as I predicted, our BM gave us horrible time about giving him ( BM) and others ( Maitre'D, waiters, attendant) tips TODAY, that is before the wedding. I knew we would have this problem with him, as he told us last time to BRING TIPS IN CASH when we pay our balance ( 10 days before the wedding), but I was thinking that we would be able to communicate to him that we want to tip them all AFTER. So, he told us (me, my FH and his parents) that he hopes we have tips today with us, and that all tips have to go through him. My FH started saying that they will get tips AFTER, BM got upset and told us 'WE CAN NOT DO IT'. The argument started.

Then his parents took over, I think they give him cash to shup him up, and he said that ON THE DAY OF THE WEDDING AT EXACTLY 9PM (as his office closes at that time)HE WILL GO INTO THE HALL WHERE OUR PARTY WILL BE TO ASK FOR TIPS.

SO i guess we will give them tips before as I DO NOT WANT HIS FILTHY *** IN MY HALL WITH MY GUESTS ASKING FOR THIS F@@@@@@ TIPS

I do not know how to deal with this

Thanks for listening

GabrielleandJohn Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:40 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

Have you gone to his superior? I would not stand for this behavior unless your contract said that tips needed to be paid in full at final payment.

daniebc16 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:41 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

that is no way to treat a bride or any customer for that reason...ummm...it is a TIP, you give it for services...and right now his *****! Sorry this happened, but don't let it ruin your day!

milana Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:41 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

wow...how can your BM be such an ****&^%?!!!!
Who DEMANDS a tip 10 DAYS before a wedding? That is disgusting...i wouldnt give him a single penny b/c he doesnt deserve it.
If you decided to tip him, and i say if b/c it for you and your FH to decide, he gets tipped the day of your wedding not 10 days before!! Im so sorry youre dealing with this unnecessary stress

thelastresort Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:42 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

I do not understand this. A tip is not mandatory, a tip is a gratuitous gift for good service. That is so inappropriate. I have never heard of that before!

olechka1911 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:42 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

His superior covers for him, I think they share$$$$

There is nothing about tips in my contract, it is optional

FuTuRe MrS MaZz Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:42 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

wow that is totally nuts!!! I cant even imagine... Although I do think the whole point of tips is to see how the service is and reward it based on that, I feel you should have settled this with him a loooong time ago...

Did this whole tip before wedding thing come outta left field???

kat74 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:44 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

a tip is based on a job well done-- how are you to tip someone before they preform their duties-- that is unbelievable and unprofessional-- I would absolutely call and speak to a superior ASAP

olechka1911 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:44 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

On top of everything, he wants ALL the tips to go through him. Meaning that there is a big chance those $$$$ will never end up at Maitre'D's pocket in the first place

ggcopying Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:45 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

wow... I can't believe he treated you like this... You should def. talk to his boss.
I am so sorry to hear that
Can you change your bm?

Dee606 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:45 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

That is a totally disgusting way to act!

olechka1911 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:46 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

No, we tried to change BM. It is too late now, 10 days to go

ggcopying Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:48 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

was he nasty to you the whole time? I mean since you booked the place?

olechka1911 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:49 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

NO, he was very 'smiling' all the time, and never caused any problems till last time, when he 'mentioned' cash tips thing

milana Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:50 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

I dont think you should give him a tip at all and only tip the Matre D! See how he likes that...wow he is so weird

thelastresort Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:51 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

What happens if you say 'Listen, I'm handling the tips. I will tip the Maitre D, the bridal attendant and waitstaff as I see fit on the day of my wedding, after the service is completed.' ?

olechka1911 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:52 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

But Hun what if he actually comes in and starts argument in front of all the guests?

The same person did that to Dgirl, who had wedding at Terrace in March.

He has no shame, he has nothing to lose

Nicole622 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:52 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

i would not tolerate that.. a tip is meant for someone who goes above and beyond on that day and not 10 days before. i would talk to his superior!!!

Drv0716 Posted: Jun 13, 2007 10:52 PM

Re: I am so upset- do not want the wedding anymore,serously

That is an absolutely disgusting way to treat a customer. A tip s given as a reward for a job well done. You cannot reward something that hasn't happened yet. There is no way I would tip the BM at all after what he's put you through & I certainly would not allow all tips to go through him.

I'm so sorry you have to deal with this!