i can't believe FFIL said this....need hugs.

So I'm tracking all of the RSVPs. And I've got a system of doing it/relaying the results. But FFIL didn't like the way I was doing it and asked to have it done differently. I told him that the way i'm doing it is easist for me and this is how i'm going to do it. he said its just as easy to do it his way. i told him that we should have gone back to the original (stupid) plan which was that his RSVPs would go to him and mine would go to me. That was my FIL's stupid idea that i hated from the start. I never would have opted to split RSVPs but after all this crap, i've learned that every time i try to do something nice, to try to help, it bites me in the @ss. So Then he starts scolding me like i'm five - in front of his entire extended family - that I'm very disrespectful. I told him to stop scolding me because he's not my father. he made a scene. then i turned to FH and told him that I wanted to leave NOW. He asked for me to give him a few minutes to speak to his dad. Fine. He comes back and tells me to go talk with his father. We go outside and his father starts up with something completely unrelated - I dismiss what he says and just ask what else can i do for him. Here's the convo:

Him: Why are you acting like this?

Me: B/c you and FMIL have made me miserable (they already knew this) planning this wedding and I don't want to deal with it anymore.

Him: Did it ever occur to you that maybe you're just a miserable person in general?

Me: Yes, of course I'm miserable. My mom is dead and I want her at my wedding. I miss her. Yes, I am miserable.

Him: People die. DEAL WITH IT.

FH & I left and said our goodbyes to the extended family. He didn't acknowledge his dad for the rest of the night.

I WOULD HAVE BEEN HYSTERICAL. YOU GO FOR STANDING UP FOR YOURSELF!

So sorry! I wonder who is acting like a 5 year old. I don't think it's you.

How inconsiderate!

Omg and hes telling you you're acting childish??? he's the one acting childish. I'm so sorry you're going through this and I'm so sorry about your mom.

That is terrible, what a jerk!!!

I am sad for you that your mom won't be at your wedding, but she'll always be on your shoulder.....

i can't believe he said this to you, so childish on his part! im sorry you are having to deal with this

He's an insensitive a$$hole. So sorry.

That's horrible. I'm so sorry!

good for you for standing up for yourself. sorry to hear about your mom. your ffil sounds like a jackass, i'd pay him no mind.

and as a ps - that is the stupidest idea i have ever heard, why would you want to split the rsvps? makes no sense to me, its too much to keep track of

How horrible of him!

I can't believe how unsympathetic he is being to your situation. If he was a little more caring, he would understand how hard it must be for you to plan this wedding without your mom. And,
you're the bride, and if your system is working, then he should keep his mouth shut! I applaude you for standing up for yourself!

Oh.... my... God...

What a way to be welcoming someone into his family.

People Die, Deal with it?

I would have punched him in the face. I give you credit!

I'd have slapped him for sure.... they would be disinvited then in my book without a doubt!!!!

I would like to slap him in his face for saying that. What a D***! I'm sorry some people are major as*******!