I don't have a MOH anymore

When FH and I picked our wedding party, we decided to keep it small and just family- especially since over the years we have lost touch with many of our close friends.

So I choose 2 sister in laws and Fh's sister. I picked one of my SIL as my MOH since I was close friends with her before she and my brother started going out. Their marriage has been rocky the past few months and she called yesterday to break the news that they are getting a divorce. So yeah, now I don't have a MOH, do I really need one? I don't want to throw someone into that position now just to have one, but I also don't want it to be weird not having one. My shower is already being taken care of by my mom and FMIL so I'm not worried about that.

I'm sorry to hear about the divorce and the situation it puts you in

I think if you asked one of the other girls, they would completely understand.

I personally would feel wierd if my FH has a best man and I didn't have a MOH.

I HTH and I hope everything works out for you

you really dont need one. my friend didn't have anyone at all in their bp. they walked down the aisle w their parents and stood alone. it was classy, elegant and simple.

remember lots of 2nd weddings and older couples dump the bp... why? bc we've dealt w that crap before and cant deal w the drama. we learned the hard way the 1st time! lol

just because she is getting divorced that means she has to bail on your wedding?? That makes no sense to me.

When FH and I broke up for a while I was a BM is his brothers wedding. They sat w me and said even though you two are not together we still love you and you are a good friend and we want you to be in the wedding. and its the truth. Im best friends w his SIL and Brother and I wouldnt give that up for the world.

Talk to her about it and let her know how important your friendship is with her

---

Posted by fdnybride163

just because she is getting divorced that means she has to bail on your wedding?? That makes no sense to me.

---

ITA give us some insight

---

Posted by fdnybride163

just because she is getting divorced that means she has to bail on your wedding?? That makes no sense to me.

When FH and I broke up for a while I was a BM is his brothers wedding. They sat w me and said even though you two are not together we still love you and you are a good friend and we want you to be in the wedding. and its the truth. Im best friends w his SIL and Brother and I wouldnt give that up for the world.

Talk to her about it and let her know how important your friendship is with her

---

honestly i do understand. this also depends on why they're getting divorced and what the relationship is with the whole family.

Ive been through a divorce and i'll tell ya, it ain't pretty or easy.

dont judge her for it. You don't know what she's going through on her end.

---

Posted by leesah85

---

Posted by fdnybride163

just because she is getting divorced that means she has to bail on your wedding?? That makes no sense to me.

---

ITA give us some insight

---

Well according to my brother things aren't pretty between the two of them. She said she would still love to be my MOH if I was okay with it, but she didn't want to make me or anyone else uncomfortable. I honestly don't want hat to put my brother or family in that position and certainly don't want any drama on my wedding day or the days leading up to it. So I am doing it out of respect for my brother.

I'm sorry to hear.. Give it a few days to settle in, don't make any major decisions, talk to FH about it, etc... Divorces can take a while and who knows your wedding might actually renew the love your brother and her had

---

Posted by allornil

you really dont need one. my friend didn't have anyone at all in their bp. they walked down the aisle w their parents and stood alone. it was classy, elegant and simple.

remember lots of 2nd weddings and older couples dump the bp... why? bc we've dealt w that crap before and cant deal w the drama. we learned the hard way the 1st time! lol

---

I hear you! I would be fine having no BP at all, but FH is the one who wants it.

I don't have to, I'm not having a BP and I will walk alone and FH will meet me half way and we will walk the rest together.

---

Posted by MrsVtoBe

---

Posted by leesah85

---

Posted by fdnybride163

just because she is getting divorced that means she has to bail on your wedding?? That makes no sense to me.

---

ITA give us some insight

---

Well according to my brother things aren't pretty between the two of them. She said she would still love to be my MOH if I was okay with it, but she didn't want to make me or anyone else uncomfortable. I honestly don't want hat to put my brother or family in that position and certainly don't want any drama on my wedding day or the days leading up to it. So I am doing it out of respect for my brother.

---

stay friends w her. be neutral though not to cause any problems w your own family. You really don't want that drama at your wedding.

---

Posted by SoonToBeMrsCali

I'm sorry to hear.. Give it a few days to settle in, don't make any major decisions, talk to FH about it, etc... Divorces can take a while and who knows your wedding might actually renew the love your brother and her had

---

That's what I am hoping. I told her we will wait and see what happens, but she knows my loyalty lies with my family. I just hate being stressed about it. I haven't stressed out about anything up until now.

---

Posted by allornil

---

Posted by MrsVtoBe

---

Posted by leesah85

---

Posted by fdnybride163

just because she is getting divorced that means she has to bail on your wedding?? That makes no sense to me.

---

ITA give us some insight

---

Well according to my brother things aren't pretty between the two of them. She said she would still love to be my MOH if I was okay with it, but she didn't want to make me or anyone else uncomfortable. I honestly don't want hat to put my brother or family in that position and certainly don't want any drama on my wedding day or the days leading up to it. So I am doing it out of respect for my brother.

---

stay friends w her. be neutral though not to cause any problems w your own family. You really don't want that drama at your wedding.

---

ITA i can see how its hard, if it is new between them things will be bitter and hard, and Im sure that all she needs from you right now is to be the best friend that you can be and hopefully things will calm down and your wedding willbe drama free and wonderful

OMG Im so sorry chica....

u dont need one though....

Thanks girls!