i wish i would have listened to everyone who told me to ELOPE!!!!!!!!!! im sooo close to cancelling, getting on a plane and eloping and getting married on the freakin beach!!! FH's famiy is deadset on NOT coming to the wedding because of our no kid policy!! theres just tooooo many of them, and i honestly do not want kids running around all night and for whatever reason they are not understanding this!
they expect me to bend my rules and say ok kids can come now, and be upset and mad on my own wedding day because theres kids there but at the same time now they are all saying they will not attend if there kids cannot....what gets me even more mad is one have a 1 year old baby and is making the biggest deal...how is a 1 year old going to enjoy a wedding? i would love for someone to explain that to me?
im soooo mad right now, i just want to cancel and freakin elope. FH doesnt know what to do because he wants his family there, but doesnt want to bend either. i just dont understand why they cant go by my wishes and rules for MY wedding day????+
I am sorry...I dont understand why people get like that..I would never impose on a someone like that! A 1 yr old! Why would you even want to bring a baby with you to a wedding...Have you discussed any other options with your FH... My friend had kids at her wedding but her sister paid for a baby sitter to stay in another room at the RH and watch all the kids there while the parents styed at the 'real wedding'...would that work somehow?
meli722
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Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
Posted by JJC
I am sorry...I dont understand why people get like that..I would never impose on a someone like that! A 1 yr old! Why would you even want to bring a baby with you to a wedding...Have you discussed any other options with your FH... My friend had kids at her wedding but her sister paid for a baby sitter to stay in another room at the RH and watch all the kids there while the parents styed at the 'real wedding'...would that work somehow?
?? sounds like a good idea, but why do i have to even do that?? there are people for these kids to stay with for the night, so why keep insisting that they HAVE to come? i have 2 weddings coming up, and i would never IMAGINE going to the bride and saying 'well if Cassandra (my daughter) cant come then i wont come!'...its just ridiculous!
lanamanitta
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Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
Don't bend your rules, it's your wedding. Being there for you and FH should be more important to them then their refusal to bend THEIR rules!!! It's not THEIR day so they don't get to dictate to you what you should do with your day that you are spending (or someone on your behalf) tens of thousands of dollars on.
If they don't come, fine. They'll be missing out. If you bend, you'll have a wedding that YOU didn't want or plan on.
If people want kids at their wedding, I say, do it! But, if you don't, you don't, and that's it. The wedding is not for them, it's for you and FH.
No one can/should tell you what you do with your day and that really p's me off when I hear that kind of thing. How selfish!!! Can you imagine if they have a birthday party for their 1 year old and you say 'can I bring my friends?' -- there is no place for them at the party, right? Well, same thing!!
MrsDrinkh20
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Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
awww..that is so frustrating...hang in there...just remembe ryou and FH are a team..whatever you decide to do you both have to do together...we always call it 'red rover style' (like the game where you hold hands tight and nothing can break through you)
MrsH09
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Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
I'm sorry you have to go through all of this. I say let him decide since it's his family & obviously they are just insistent on being obnoxious...no matter what u chose they will probably still not be happy. but if it makes you feel any better here are a couple of hugs
melcc83
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Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
No matter what you have to do what makes you happy...this is the day where it is about you . I know its hard b/c at one point we were going through something like this to. Hang in there let us know how everything turns out. Remember no matter how bad it gets the LIW girls will be here for you
Espo22
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Member since
Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
Posted by meli722
i wish i would have listened to everyone who told me to ELOPE!!!!!!!!!! im sooo close to cancelling, getting on a plane and eloping and getting married on the freakin beach!!! FH's famiy is deadset on NOT coming to the wedding because of our no kid policy!! theres just tooooo many of them, and i honestly do not want kids running around all night and for whatever reason they are not understanding this!
they expect me to bend my rules and say ok kids can come now, and be upset and mad on my own wedding day because theres kids there but at the same time now they are all saying they will not attend if there kids cannot....what gets me even more mad is one have a 1 year old baby and is making the biggest deal...how is a 1 year old going to enjoy a wedding? i would love for someone to explain that to me?
im soooo mad right now, i just want to cancel and freakin elope. FH doesnt know what to do because he wants his family there, but doesnt want to bend either. i just dont understand why they cant go by my wishes and rules for MY wedding day????+
oh no i am so sorry... i also had alot of problems bc of the no kid policy. And a 1 year old what is wrong with ppl, first of all why would you bring a 1 year old to a wedding? its just not right. Its not appropriate in my opinion, a 1 year old still sleeps alot, theres loud music and so much noise, if it gets tired what are you going to do keep it up or let it sleep on a chair, its just not right, i would never do that to my 1 year old, well when i have one lol.
We had some ppl who wanted to show their own way of how much they didn't like our policy if it would've been 10 kids ok but we were looking at 40 or more kids, thats just ridiculous and our wedding ended at 1:30am.
People are just crazy seriously, and need to respect your wishes. This is not about their kids its about your wedding.
MrsH09
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Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
Posted by MrsDrinkh20
awww..that is so frustrating...hang in there...just remembe ryou and FH are a team..whatever you decide to do you both have to do together...we always call it 'red rover style' (like the game where you hold hands tight and nothing can break through you)
it IS ridic...I totally agree with you BUt if its is family then unfortunatly you may have to cave somehow. Believe me..I have my own issue with my FHs family. I hear ya...LOL SOme people are just weird like that....I am sure it will work itself out...maybe if you jus tact like the mature one and kill them with kindness, they will just forget the whole idea. Act like you are willing to accomodate them and it will give you brownie points at least....
NikkiR515
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Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
I am so sorry you have to go through this... Try to be strong... It is YOUR wedding day and they just need to get over themselves!
FuTuRe MrS MaZz
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Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
maybe some are angry bc they dont have anyone to watch their kids i have no clue... you would think parents would be happy to have a night out without the kids!
lanamanitta
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Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
And more . . . hehe, this really bothers me . . . .
Ask them if they ever go out of the house without their kids. Do they? Then why can't they for a wedding? Do they work? If so, that's amazing . . . . wow, daycare for 8 hours 5 days a week, but not for your ONE day???
Or if they don't work, do they go to movies, dinner, shopping, without the kids? If not, well, then, I guess they can't make the wedding either . . . . but if so, then again I ask . . . why not for this day?
Espo22
Posted:
Member since
Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
Posted by meli722
Posted by JJC
I am sorry...I dont understand why people get like that..I would never impose on a someone like that! A 1 yr old! Why would you even want to bring a baby with you to a wedding...Have you discussed any other options with your FH... My friend had kids at her wedding but her sister paid for a baby sitter to stay in another room at the RH and watch all the kids there while the parents styed at the 'real wedding'...would that work somehow?
?? sounds like a good idea, but why do i have to even do that?? there are people for these kids to stay with for the night, so why keep insisting that they HAVE to come? i have 2 weddings coming up, and i would never IMAGINE going to the bride and saying 'well if Cassandra (my daughter) cant come then i wont come!'...its just ridiculous!
i was actually planning on hiring a sitter for all the kids. I even talked to my mom about it because she knew somebody who does this and had asked her to find out the price. Well soon after I find out things some people were saying, and I said forget it, people are going to be this rude then why should i spend my own money for a sitter. IT wasnt even about a sitter either which is funny, i know for a fact they had people to watch the kids. Either had a nanny, or know that their in-laws watch the kids all the time. If people weren't so nasty i would've planned something for the kids, was going to get a few ppl to watch them bc it has to be 1 sitter to 5-7 kids i forgot, and get someone to do face painting and all that. But im glad i heard what was said before
meli722
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Member since
Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
im just really upset right now about it it just pisses the hell out of me! and honestly i DONT want to cave in because its not the wedding I want , i want a wedding with no kids, and i dont get why its so hard for them to understand that i really want to throw the towel with the whole thing and elope
meli722
Posted:
Member since
Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
Posted by Espo22
Posted by meli722
Posted by JJC
I am sorry...I dont understand why people get like that..I would never impose on a someone like that! A 1 yr old! Why would you even want to bring a baby with you to a wedding...Have you discussed any other options with your FH... My friend had kids at her wedding but her sister paid for a baby sitter to stay in another room at the RH and watch all the kids there while the parents styed at the 'real wedding'...would that work somehow?
?? sounds like a good idea, but why do i have to even do that?? there are people for these kids to stay with for the night, so why keep insisting that they HAVE to come? i have 2 weddings coming up, and i would never IMAGINE going to the bride and saying 'well if Cassandra (my daughter) cant come then i wont come!'...its just ridiculous!
i was actually planning on hiring a sitter for all the kids. I even talked to my mom about it because she knew somebody who does this and had asked her to find out the price. Well soon after I find out things some people were saying, and I said forget it, people are going to be this rude then why should i spend my own money for a sitter. IT wasnt even about a sitter either which is funny, i know for a fact they had people to watch the kids. Either had a nanny, or know that their in-laws watch the kids all the time. If people weren't so nasty i would've planned something for the kids, was going to get a few ppl to watch them bc it has to be 1 sitter to 5-7 kids i forgot, and get someone to do face painting and all that. But im glad i heard what was said before
i agree! i honestly dont see why i have to do that for people who are being so RUDe and NASTy, i dont even wanna say some of the comments i have heard, and out of respect for FH i dont say anything............so i see no reason to bend my back for these people? i understand its his family, but they cant even respect his own wishes
Espo22
Posted:
Member since
Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
Posted by meli722
im just really upset right now about it it just pisses the hell out of me! and honestly i DONT want to cave in because its not the wedding I want , i want a wedding with no kids, and i dont get why its so hard for them to understand that i really want to throw the towel with the whole thing and elope
if its something you REALLY don't want then don't give in. Just make them feel stupid by saying to them that if they are willing to miss your wedding then its obviously not important to them so to do whatever they want.
Does your RH charge for kids meals? some places do, mine did and let me tell you it wasn't cheap and all they get is chicken fingers and fries. I would love to see if their parents would ever pay that much for chicken fingers and fries. Also tell them that you would have to pay for the kids, and if they want to take on that extra expense since it means so much to them NOT you to go right ahead.
im just really upset right now about it it just pisses the hell out of me! and honestly i DONT want to cave in because its not the wedding I want , i want a wedding with no kids, and i dont get why its so hard for them to understand that i really want to throw the towel with the whole thing and elope
ok..you just answered you're own questions...dont cave...i take back my advice.....No kids...loud music..alcholhol..nokids on your side..no kids on his side...no kids or dont come!
meli722
Posted:
Member since
Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
Posted by JJC
Posted by meli722
im just really upset right now about it it just pisses the hell out of me! and honestly i DONT want to cave in because its not the wedding I want , i want a wedding with no kids, and i dont get why its so hard for them to understand that i really want to throw the towel with the whole thing and elope
ok..you just answered you're own questions...dont cave...i take back my advice.....No kids...loud music..alcholhol..nokids on your side..no kids on his side...no kids or dont come!
lol sorry if it came out wrong, im just soooooooo upset
meli722
Posted:
Member since
Re: im soooo close to cancelling the wedding
Posted by Espo22
Posted by meli722
im just really upset right now about it it just pisses the hell out of me! and honestly i DONT want to cave in because its not the wedding I want , i want a wedding with no kids, and i dont get why its so hard for them to understand that i really want to throw the towel with the whole thing and elope
if its something you REALLY don't want then don't give in. Just make them feel stupid by saying to them that if they are willing to miss your wedding then its obviously not important to them so to do whatever they want.
Does your RH charge for kids meals? some places do, mine did and let me tell you it wasn't cheap and all they get is chicken fingers and fries. I would love to see if their parents would ever pay that much for chicken fingers and fries. Also tell them that you would have to pay for the kids, and if they want to take on that extra expense since it means so much to them NOT you to go right ahead.
i think leonards has a kids menu?? i honeslty didnt ask because i have been on the whole no kids thing since the begininng.....and the girl who JUST had the baby, will have the 1 year old in June of 09...so even before she told anyone she was pregnant ,these was my wishes......and no one seems to freakin understand
