it is ok for engaged or married couples to have female or male friends while being in a relationship?
is it ok for FH to have female friends?
xosweetiexo
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Re: ladies i have a question
I dont know what you really mean by your question.... but Im going to take a guess-
I think its okay to have friendships of course.... BUT if he went out with a female friend ONLY- then I'd be pissed off. FH has friends he talks to on facebook, nothing to worry about b/c they are friends.
WishfulRinne
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Re: ladies i have a question
Oh boy..this is a big question. This is my take on it. If the friend has had any romantic feelings towards you or your FH in the past at all-then it is not ok to be friends that talk all the time. If you have had this friend forever and there has never been any romantic feelings than it is ok to be friends. But the title 'friends' is a hard one. I have a lot of male friends BUT I do not talk to these friends on a daily basis. That just isnt cool in my book. I feel like I didnt make any sense but I hope I answered your question! LOL
gina409
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Re: ladies i have a question
do u mean is it ok for fh to have friends that r girls..well i would say its ok but and this si just me if it was a friend that texted him al night ort they went out alone id prob raise n eyebrow..unless maybe they knew each other for many years or if she was married..and of course if she was butt ugly .....it all depends on the situation..i mean a girl he just meets that all the sudden he is friends with and they r hanging out..um no...but i have friends for many many years that r guys..fh knows them and they r friends now..but it also helps im a total tomboy n thats why i have a lot of guy friends...i hope this ramble helped
jayepyt
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Re: ladies i have a question
it really depends on the friend i know i have male friends and fh has female friends but iam cool with them
KerriJohnS
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Re: ladies i have a question
Yes... but it depends on what kind of friends they are? I have plenty of guy friends... but that's all they are and that's all they will ever be. They are not people I ever hooked up with, went out with or had feelings for. They are stricktly platonic and I think of them as a brother.... the thought of even kissing them is nausiating! Ha ha ha!
So if it really is all innocent then it's fine. But if there are any sort of underlining feelings that shouldn't be there then it's not ok. Think of it as 'if this something that I would mind if FH did?' BC if it is then you are doing something wrong.
Also, if it clearly is bothering FH or you then it's gone too far and you need to take a step back. the most important person in your life should be FH not this friend. I'm not saying to lose the friend but maybe taking a step back will help.
Also I believe it's important to not cross a line. Confiding certain things in a friend over FH can be considered crossing a line.
coldasice217
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Re: ladies i have a question
I think it's fine as long as there's no weird sexual tension.
FH had a female friend that he would hang out with regularly before we met, but they lost touch a bit, and now he doesn't see her at all. Even if they didn't lose touch, I don't think he would see her one on one, not that they were romantic at all, just he wouldn't feel comfortable.
I don't have any male friends that still live in the state, so FH doesn't have to worry about that. If my one friend still was here, I don't think I would see him alone, because there definitely was tension, and it would be disrespectful on my part, and to say that FH is the jealous type is an understatement.
alli3131
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Re: ladies i have a question
i think its fine. my best friend is a guy and I would never change that for FH and one of his good friends is a girl. I think its fine if you know who they are are know that its nothing more. And yes I have hung out with my friend without FH and vice versa. I truly trust FH and he trusts me
sumerbride09
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Re: ladies i have a question
FH has some female friends and it used to bother me, I wont lie but i also trust FH 100% so im not too worried about it. I ask alot of questions when he goes out with girlies but he got used to that. I think its okay as long as you are open and honest with Fh. maybe im too trusting but i know his friends are just friends.
Future Mrs Roo
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Re: ladies i have a question
absolutely. FH has female friends and one of my best friends is a male.
MrsCtobe
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Re: ladies i have a question
fh and I dont have 'friends' of the opposite sex, and by that I mean, no one close...like say someone we hang out with or talk to on the phone. we both agree that it limits problems down the line, and we both ended our opposite sex friendships when we started getting serious, without even discussing it with eachother. i know its not a popular decision and a lot of people feel it is ok to have platonic friends of the opposite sex, but i know for us, it would never work. besides, i can say with 100% honesty that I have NEVER had a male friend who didn't try to hit on me from time to time or who didn't start looking appealing after a few drinks, lol....which confirms my belief that it is very difficult for guys and girls to be just friends. JMO
julesrbf
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Re: ladies i have a question
Everyone's different. Whatever you and FH think is right for you is the right answer. No one else can really tell you, you know?
FutureMrsC614
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Re: ladies i have a question
it depends. if you know these woman friends, and are cool with it, then I would say ok. if he's making new female friends, and hanging out with them without you even knowing who they are, or ever meeting them, then i would say there's a problem. In my opinion, it's never cool for my FH to hang out alone with a female friend, unless i'm there. or unless the female doesn't like men that way lol.
vicandbarbara09
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Re: ladies i have a question
It all depends on your relationship with FH. Does he hide the fact that he has female friends?If you trust FH then having female friends shouldn't be an issue. My FH has plenty of female friends and I don't have any issues with that. He had females friends before he met me so I can't expect him to cut off all ties with them .
gisellea
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Re: ladies i have a question
hmmm, we have friends of the opposite sex but there's a lot more boundaries that i dont cross and vice versa. examples: i dont have any guy friends that call me to chit chat everynight and i dont go out drinking with my boys, lol.
back when i was single and my guy friends started dating seriously, i realized that my relationships with them would change. i couldnt call them up at midnite anymore to complain about some date i just went on cuz their girlfriends might be like UM, OK or at least i know I would have a problem with that so i dont do it and i dont want it to be done to me, lol.
gisellea
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Re: ladies i have a question
Posted by FutureMrsC614
it depends. if you know these woman friends, and are cool with it, then I would say ok. if he's making new female friends, and hanging out with them without you even knowing who they are, or ever meeting them, then i would say there's a problem. In my opinion, it's never cool for my FH to hang out alone with a female friend, unless i'm there. or unless the female doesn't like men that way lol.
haha true, thats a good rule too.
FutureMrsG
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Re: ladies i have a question
I think it is fine for married and engaged couples to have friends of the opposite sex. Personally sometimes my guy friends give the best relationship advice...I think they have a different perspective on things.
twoifbysea
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Re: ladies i have a question
Posted by Future Mrs Roo
absolutely. FH has female friends and one of my best friends is a male.
Ditto!
MrsCastanedain09
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Re: ladies i have a question
Posted by MrsCtobe
fh and I dont have 'friends' of the opposite sex, and by that I mean, no one close...like say someone we hang out with or talk to on the phone. we both agree that it limits problems down the line, and we both ended our opposite sex friendships when we started getting serious, without even discussing it with eachother. i know its not a popular decision and a lot of people feel it is ok to have platonic friends of the opposite sex, but i know for us, it would never work. besides, i can say with 100% honesty that I have NEVER had a male friend who didn't try to hit on me from time to time or who didn't start looking appealing after a few drinks, lol....which confirms my belief that it is very difficult for guys and girls to be just friends. JMO
Wow. I thought I was alone on this one. My former 'best friend' was a guy. I pulled away once I got serious with FH before he even brought it up. I felt the friend always had intentions, started saying things like- you're the one that got away. No thanks, I don't need anyone putting stress on my relationship. I also have not had a male friend who didn't hit on me at some point. I agree that it's difficult for guys and girls to be friends. Glad I'm not alone
flairforfashion
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Re: ladies i have a question
ITA agree with most of the answers on here...
As long as it's someone who has been around for a while, then it's okay... If it's someone new, I'd be wondering.
