Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

Original post by Snowflake08

Dec 11, 2007 11:06 PM

Ok one of my so called best friends got married 2 years ago
I was in her wedding and helped her with EVERYTHING
i did her envelopes, had her shower at my apartment, planned the bachelorette party
got her e-ring at wholesale cost from my uncle and wedding bands and a lot of other stuff too

FH and i helped her move upstate when she and her husband bought their house

i sent her a text because i got a xmas card from her but no RSVP
she JUST sent me an email saying that she is NOT COMING to my wedding and her excuse is SO LAME

Her husband (who WAS my friend too) goes every January to a differen steak house in the US with his closest friends
so she emailed me that she didnt realize when he booked his annual trip that he wasnt getting back until Feb 3
MEANWHILE, i invited her mother and step father too so if she WANTED to be there and not drive alone, she COULD come with them!!!

what would you do or say to her if you were me??

FH is at work, i called him crying, he feels so bad but keeps telling me not to let it bother me

FutureMrsCarrieri Posted: Dec 11, 2007 11:56 PM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

Posted by Snowflake08

thanks!
i just hate the feeling of bending over backwards for people and getting the shaft in return

Which is why I am only having family in my BP. My family is awesome and would never do what some of my so-called friends have done!

Snowflake08 Posted: Dec 11, 2007 11:57 PM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

thanks kristin
i really cant believe that she wouldnt come alone

im so hurt and upset

1nicetouch Posted: Dec 11, 2007 11:58 PM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

OMG I would let her have it. you learn who your true friends are when your planning your wedding.

RKellner Posted: Dec 12, 2007 12:00 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

WOW!
I am so sorry that this is happening to you!
I would be livid! I dont find her excuse reasonable at all!
I would def tell her how you feel and if she still decides not to go.. I would wash my hands of it all....
Dont let it upset you, as hard as it may be....

gabbie83 Posted: Dec 12, 2007 12:04 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

Posted by FutureMrsCarrieri

Posted by Snowflake08

thanks!
i just hate the feeling of bending over backwards for people and getting the shaft in return

Which is why I am only having family in my BP. My family is awesome and would never do what some of my so-called friends have done!

I know same here.
I really hope it works out.
Some people are just horrible/I dont know why but I think jealousy comes into play a lot....

Snowflake08 Posted: Dec 12, 2007 12:06 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

Posted by FutureMrsCarrieri

Posted by Snowflake08

thanks!
i just hate the feeling of bending over backwards for people and getting the shaft in return

Which is why I am only having family in my BP. My family is awesome and would never do what some of my so-called friends have done!

oh same here
i am only having my sister and FH is having his older brother as best man

she was annoyed at that too
when she asked about my wedding party and i said i was only having my sister
i guess since i was in hers

AndRecKy Posted: Dec 12, 2007 06:25 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

im sorry your 'friend' is doing this. hopefully the email you sent wakes her up! did she respond? you really learn people's true colors during this wedding planning process. she is so selfish. i hope things work out, keep us updated!!

chrispar Posted: Dec 12, 2007 06:31 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

Wow I would be really upset and ANGRY at the same time. That is just unbelieveable. I think you handled yourself really well

MAY24BRIDE Posted: Dec 12, 2007 07:15 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

I would be completely upset over this too. It sounds like you handled it really well by telling her how you feel and your disappointment in her as a friend. Now it's just a matter of what she says back...if anything at all. But no matter what, a good friend shouldn't have made you feel this way to begin with.

blu6385 Posted: Dec 12, 2007 08:46 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

i would be completely upset and i probably would have handled it a lot owrse!!! I think your handling it perfectly!!!! and i hope she sees how wrong she is being!!!!

2007 Crescent Bride Posted: Dec 12, 2007 08:48 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

I personally would not say anything to her!! It only proves what type of friend she is. Sorry. People can be inconsiderate and selfish

minibride08 Posted: Dec 12, 2007 08:49 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

Posted by Bride 2 Be

Posted by Snowflake08

Posted by Bride 2 Be

wow thats absolutely ridiculous! i would definately say something to her..thats just plain rude that you did all that stuff for her..and she can't even show up for your wedding..im sorry laura
thanks
i am beyond upset and angry
and now im deleting her pics from my LIW album LOL

and i agree with bonnie! shes an adult and can go places without her husband..i don't understand what the problem is..

100% agreed!!!! I'd be pissed too....

Snowflake08 Posted: Dec 12, 2007 08:57 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

thanks girls
i am so angry!!
i dont know if she will respond, but she hasn't yet

Future Mulligan Posted: Dec 12, 2007 09:00 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

im sorry

i think the email you sent her was perfect.....we all cant wait to see what she says.....

KK Holiday Posted: Dec 12, 2007 09:01 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

I would tell her how upset you are, because maybe she doesnt realize. but i know if it was me in your situation I wouldnt want anyone to come out of obligation.

here are some hugs for you YOU NEED THEM!!!!

skinny237 Posted: Dec 12, 2007 09:02 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

Sorry I just read through the posting and all of the responses now. I think you're email to her was very appropriate. I could have been really b!tchy but handled it really well. I would be really upset too. Especially because you sent the STD's out last February. It's not like u just got engaged and were putting together a last-minute wedding. I understand she is pregnant, but she could totally come with her parents. Some people just refuse to attend things if there significant others are not there---I don't get it. Plus, his reason for not being able to go is pathetic. JMO. I bet she responds to the email---I just wonder what she'll say.

Snowflake08 Posted: Dec 12, 2007 09:08 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

thanks
im glad you girls feel that what i said was appropriate
i could have been real nasty, but i held back
i am not holding my breath for a response

when i told FH he said 'F her!'
i dont want ANYONE to come out of obligation
i want people to WANT to be there

Mizzdimple Posted: Dec 12, 2007 09:29 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

omg that is horrible! Everyone's true colors come shinging through dont they. I am so sorry you are going through this and I sort of write people off when this happens, but I would say to you at least express your feelings towards the situation.

eta: jsut read your response....you did the right thing

Mici n KC Posted: Dec 12, 2007 09:35 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

You definitely did the right thing.

MrsHtobe Posted: Dec 12, 2007 09:40 AM

Re: Major VENT I am SOO UPSET

I'm SO sorry you have to go through this! She is ridiculously immature and that is really sad that she won't come alone to your wedding - screw that, its sad that her husband won't be cutting his trip short for ONE year, so that he can attend his wife's 'best friend's' wedding.

Not that I'm attempting to defend her on ANY level, but do you think maybe she is acting like this because she is offended that she wasn't asked to be in the bridal party?

Has she responded to any of your texts or anything?