Mental Break Down update

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Posted by JZNCK

I haven't talked to ANYONE YET... FI knows, but he doesn't want to cancel the wedding.. BUT WE HAVE NO CHOICE.. We've already paid $10,000 into the hall, we don't have any limos.. here is what we have left to pay...




Hall $7,142.00

Officiant-$400

Honeymoon-$2539.

Flowers--$1100

DJ-$1250

Rings-$1300 (already paid half)

Dress-$950 ( already paid half)

Gift for attendants-$500 ( and that's a crappy gift)

Rehearsal Dinner-$800


Where can I really cut???

Thanks

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To start, RD and bluntly telling the hall where things stand -- let them work with you.

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Posted by JZNCK

I will call the hall tomorrow, and tell them.. I'm embarrassed, but I guess I shouldn't be..

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WHY on earth -- you have NOTHING to be embarrassed about. I guarantee you, not only have they seen this before, they will have in mind eexactly what to do.

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Posted by JZNCK

I haven't talked to ANYONE YET... FI knows, but he doesn't want to cancel the wedding.. BUT WE HAVE NO CHOICE.. We've already paid $10,000 into the hall, we don't have any limos.. here is what we have left to pay...




Hall $7,142.00

Officiant-$400

Honeymoon-$2539.

Flowers--$1100

DJ-$1250

Rings-$1300 (already paid half)

Dress-$950 ( already paid half)

gift for attendants-$500 ( and that's a crappy gift)

Rehearsal Dinner-$800


Where can I really cut???

Thanks

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cut honeymoon you can always go later
cut dj in half use vinny high voltage
cut rd do dinner at your house
flowers you can do yourself

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Posted by MamanDaddyof2

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Posted by JZNCK

I haven't talked to ANYONE YET... FI knows, but he doesn't want to cancel the wedding.. BUT WE HAVE NO CHOICE.. We've already paid $10,000 into the hall, we don't have any limos.. here is what we have left to pay...




Hall $7,142.00

Officiant-$400

Honeymoon-$2539.

Flowers--$1100

DJ-$1250

Rings-$1300 (already paid half)

Dress-$950 ( already paid half)

gift for attendants-$500 ( and that's a crappy gift)

Rehearsal Dinner-$800


Where can I really cut???

Thanks

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cut honeymoon you can always go later
cut dj in half use vinny high voltage
cut rd do dinner at your house
flowers you can do yourself

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All good thinking Maman -- you can do candles cp's -- really pretty - there has been a pic floating around! Pot luck RD is a great one -- and much more meaning in a home. And HM -- wait a couple of months. MAman - I like how you think!

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Posted by DebMaher

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Posted by JZNCK

I haven't talked to ANYONE YET... FI knows, but he doesn't want to cancel the wedding.. BUT WE HAVE NO CHOICE.. We've already paid $10,000 into the hall, we don't have any limos.. here is what we have left to pay...




Hall $7,142.00

Officiant-$400

Honeymoon-$2539.

Flowers--$1100

DJ-$1250

Rings-$1300 (already paid half)

Dress-$950 ( already paid half)

Gift for attendants-$500 ( and that's a crappy gift)

Rehearsal Dinner-$800


Where can I really cut???

Thanks

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Just RD and bluntly telling the hall where things stand -- let them work with you.

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Maybe change the honeymoon...there are a lot of discount cruises that will cost less than that that time of yeaer if you are intersted in that.......and the DJ sounds kind of High to me...but thats just me I did not check with DJs at all...what ar eyou getting your attendants for gifts? how many do you have? Wwe spent a total of 250 on all our attendants total....got sterling silver heart toggle necklaces for the girls and eddie bauer watches for the guys...we had 5 girls and 6 guys and Flower Girl to get that stuff for...

And RD...can u just have something at someones house?

we already booked the honeymoon, do you think we can get out of now?? we would drop it.. that would help so much.. we can pay like $5,00 just not $11,000.. The RD is out too.. We've had the dj booked for almost 2 years.. I don't know if he would cancel..

and we're not even having flower centerpieces.. we have candle ones, and we wanted to put rose petals around them.. UHH!! THIS IS INSANE.. It doesn't seem like a lot.. but it is..

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Posted by holly231

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Posted by DebMaher

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Posted by JZNCK

I haven't talked to ANYONE YET... FI knows, but he doesn't want to cancel the wedding.. BUT WE HAVE NO CHOICE.. We've already paid $10,000 into the hall, we don't have any limos.. here is what we have left to pay...




Hall $7,142.00

Officiant-$400

Honeymoon-$2539.

Flowers--$1100

DJ-$1250

Rings-$1300 (already paid half)

Dress-$950 ( already paid half)

Gift for attendants-$500 ( and that's a crappy gift)

Rehearsal Dinner-$800


Where can I really cut???

Thanks

---

Just RD and bluntly telling the hall where things stand -- let them work with you.

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Maybe change the honeymoon...there are a lot of discount cruises that will cost less than that that time of yeaer if you are intersted in that.......and the DJ sounds kind of High to me...but thats just me I did not check with DJs at all...what ar eyou getting your attendants for gifts? how many do you have? Wwe spent a total of 250 on all our attendants total....got sterling silver heart toggle necklaces for the girls and eddie bauer watches for the guys...we had 5 girls and 6 guys and Flower Girl to get that stuff for...

And RD...can u just have something at someones house?

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WOW $250 that is AWESOME!!! We have 6 guys and 6 girls on both sides.. I'll look into this a little bit more

you booked the honeymoon, but did u PAY for it yet? If not, I see no reason you cannot get out of it....


OR,. maybe who you booked iwth has a honeymoon registry, and whoever hosts your shower can put that in the invites as one of your registries....

Girl-come talk with me..our budget for gifts is $125 for BM, and $125 for GM's...Did you see on 05' how much I got for the girls? A TON...

My CP's are costing $100 ....and thats about 15 candles a table with rose petals( we had to use silk versus real to cut costs!)
CALL THE TRAVEL AGENT...ask about HM..I'm doing that now, I need to cut costs there too.

The rings...Can you use the money you put down and get something cheaper? Our budget for rings is $250 for BOTH...I'm getting a plain white gold band and for our 5th anniversary will have something made that I love and can afford.

Why do your flowers cost so much...Cut down on the amount just a little and you can save a few hundred.

I'm TELLING you we can get this down by at least $5000!!!

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Posted by JZNCK

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Posted by holly231

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Posted by DebMaher

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Posted by JZNCK

I haven't talked to ANYONE YET... FI knows, but he doesn't want to cancel the wedding.. BUT WE HAVE NO CHOICE.. We've already paid $10,000 into the hall, we don't have any limos.. here is what we have left to pay...




Hall $7,142.00

Officiant-$400

Honeymoon-$2539.

Flowers--$1100

DJ-$1250

Rings-$1300 (already paid half)

Dress-$950 ( already paid half)

Gift for attendants-$500 ( and that's a crappy gift)

Rehearsal Dinner-$800


Where can I really cut???

Thanks

---

Just RD and bluntly telling the hall where things stand -- let them work with you.

---

Maybe change the honeymoon...there are a lot of discount cruises that will cost less than that that time of yeaer if you are intersted in that.......and the DJ sounds kind of High to me...but thats just me I did not check with DJs at all...what ar eyou getting your attendants for gifts? how many do you have? Wwe spent a total of 250 on all our attendants total....got sterling silver heart toggle necklaces for the girls and eddie bauer watches for the guys...we had 5 girls and 6 guys and Flower Girl to get that stuff for...

And RD...can u just have something at someones house?

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WOW $250 that is AWESOME!!! We have 6 guys and 6 girls on both sides.. I'll look into this a little bit more

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check overstock.com and you will be surprised at how cheap some of the prices are!!!

Also, since you are after Christmas, you can get some great deals on gifts after the holidays, like if you wanted to add a bath and body thing (lotion, showergel set) from Kohls or some other place you can get them really clearanced...

ooh I thought of another thing!!!!
did you have your shower yet?? If not do what my MOH is doing when people ask what I need she is going to tell them $$$$$$
We have a house and 2 kids already so we have blenders and dishes etc
and fh's company got sold (he is a manager) and his last day is 2 weeks before our wedding so we could also use the $$$
People will understand trust me

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Posted by JZNCK

I haven't talked to ANYONE YET... FI knows, but he doesn't want to cancel the wedding.. BUT WE HAVE NO CHOICE.. We've already paid $10,000 into the hall, we don't have any limos.. here is what we have left to pay...




Hall $7,142.00

Officiant-$400

Honeymoon-$2539.

Flowers--$1100

DJ-$1250

Rings-$1300 (already paid half)

Dress-$950 ( already paid half)

Gift for attendants-$500 ( and that's a crappy gift)

Rehearsal Dinner-$800


Where can I really cut???

Thanks

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Crystal..you can cut some here..
maybe take an extended weekend somewhere instead of a HM..won't really save much but it is something..

Flowers...I don't know if this would save any but DIY?? Using Nadine's budget wedding website. She has a link to a great glass vendor for vases. And buy your own flowers at a florist and you and your friends can make them the night before or the morning of, if you have time...

Gifts for attendants...I know people like to give lavious gifts but my DH said to me 'my friends don't expect anything as we don't give gifts to the groomsmen in Ireland'. Fair enough! We went to Things Remembered and got them travelling kits with their names engraved on them. They will thrilled. For my girls, I bought them earrings from Cathy's Concepts and necklaces from Crislu. Less than $100 per person. I think it all cost $300 total. No one minded a bit!

Rehursal dinner - you do not *have* to have one. We were going to but ended up not doing it in the end since 2 groomsmen flew in the day before and were still jet lagged and one girl wasn't sure if she could make it. We ended up getting a cake and had coffee and dessert back at my house. Or dont' have one at all...just say some words after the rehursal and give out the gifts then.

If people know you are cutting back because of monetary circumstances they will understand.


ETA: centerpieces. I think Pier One or Ikea sells small votice tealights - a bag of either 50 or 100 for $10. And the glass website I mentioned (JC Marketing I think ti's called) I got votive candle holders for cheap. I think a line of candles down the middle of the table is so elegant. You don't need 20...3 sets of 3 would do it I think. Or round tables...cluster 5 together in the middle. I think understated is more elegant anyway.

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Posted by JZNCK

we already booked the honeymoon, do you think we can get out of now?? we would drop it.. that would help so much.. we can pay like $5,00 just not $11,000.. The RD is out too.. We've had the dj booked for almost 2 years.. I don't know if he would cancel..

and we're not even having flower centerpieces.. we have candle ones, and we wanted to put rose petals around them.. UHH!! THIS IS INSANE.. It doesn't seem like a lot.. but it is..

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Rose petals you can buy cheap in bulk off ebay!

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Posted by Maribelle7777

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Posted by JZNCK

I haven't talked to ANYONE YET... FI knows, but he doesn't want to cancel the wedding.. BUT WE HAVE NO CHOICE.. We've already paid $10,000 into the hall, we don't have any limos.. here is what we have left to pay...




Hall $7,142.00

Officiant-$400

Honeymoon-$2539.

Flowers--$1100

DJ-$1250

Rings-$1300 (already paid half)

Dress-$950 ( already paid half)

Gift for attendants-$500 ( and that's a crappy gift)

Rehearsal Dinner-$800


Where can I really cut???

Thanks

---

Crystal..you can cut some here..
maybe take an extended weekend somewhere instead of a HM..won't really save much but it is something..

Flowers...I don't know if this would save any but DIY?? Using Nadine's budget wedding website. She has a link to a great glass vendor for vases. And buy your own flowers at a florist and you and your friends can make them the night before or the morning of, if you have time...

Gifts for attendants...I know people like to give lavious gifts but my DH said to me 'my friends don't expect anything as we don't give gifts to the groomsmen in Ireland'. Fair enough! We went to Things Remembered and got them travelling kits with their names engraved on them. They will thrilled. For my girls, I bought them earrings from Cathy's Concepts and necklaces from Crislu. Less than $100 per person. I think it all cost $300 total. No one minded a bit!

Rehursal dinner - you do not *have* to have one. We were going to but ended up not doing it in the end since 2 groomsmen flew in the day before and were still jet lagged and one girl wasn't sure if she could make it. We ended up getting a cake and had coffee and dessert back at my house. Or dont' have one at all...just say some words after the rehursal and give out the gifts then.

If people know you are cutting back because of monetary circumstances they will understand.


ETA: centerpieces. I think Pier One or Ikea sells small votice tealights - a bag of either 50 or 100 for $10. And the glass website I mentioned (JC Marketing I think ti's called) I got votive candle holders for cheap. I think a line of candles down the middle of the table is so elegant. You don't need 20...3 sets of 3 would do it I think. Or round tables...cluster 5 together in the middle. I think understated is more elegant anyway.

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Michaels sells tealights in a bag of 100 for $3.99 ..thats where I got mine.
Wait for sales for candles..I just bought the tall pillar ones at AC moore ..they were $1 for the short ones and $1.42 for the big ones...the cheapest they normally are on sale for is like $2 or $3...Since I had to buy a lot, I saved a lot!

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Posted by JZNCK

I will call the hall tomorrow, and tell them.. I'm embarrassed, but I guess I shouldn't be..

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I'm sure they can work with you. It doesn't hurt to try and you have nothing to be embarassed about. Also, you could see if you can cut down on the other vendors, see if they would work with you. And, nix the honeymoon for now. That's going to save you a chunk as well.

Things to consider with the hall:
- will they drop the minimum?
- subtract things from the CH
- cut length of reception to 4 hours (saves on DJ and photo/video, too)
- see if they'll drop price somewhat if you give them nearly exact guest counts for each entree a few weeks before (you'll need to list checkboxes for the entrees on your response cards)
- substitute pricey entrees for less expensive ones (e.g., sirloin instead of filet mignon -- it's still steak!)
- cut CH entirely
- limit types of alcohol served (beer, wine only)

Crystal I'm so sorry to hear you are going through this! But don't worry -- your wedding is still going to be beautiful and there is alot you can still do to make cuts. Most of the other girls already made great suggestions but the place where I can see that you can save the most money is with your hall. You really need to talk to them because I'm sure they can suggest things and work with you more than you know. Tell them you think you are going to have to cancel completely and they will work with you. You have nothing to be embarassed about either.

First, get them to lower your minimum. Then cut your guest list as much as you possibly can. Make your wedding very intimate and it will be even more special.

I know it will all work out!

ETA: Also, you can probably cut the bridal party gifts out entirely. They are your friends and they will understand. Also, they will still be there for you to thank AFTER the wedding, when you are in a better position. You can explain the situation to them and write them each a heartfelt thank you letter with a card. Then afterwards, you can buy them nice gifts.

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Posted by JZNCK

Thanks Everyone!!!

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it will get better & you
will have yr wedding