My scary guest list- how much is too much?

OK, due to my FMIL thinking that she can invite everyone who she has ever known (while contributing NOTHING to the wedding, but thats another thread) my guest list has grown to scary proportions. We are sending out STDs, so I have the list done already.

Here goes- the guarentee is 150p. Our list is up to...200

I should note that half of the people are from out of town (Syracuse), and FMIL does not think that they will come. I think its taking a big risk inviting that many over our minimum- what if they all show up??? GAH! What do you ladies think?

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

Don't worry. A 150 guarantee and a 200 guest list is not bad. You will be surprised at how many no's you get....I think the average is 20%. Don't panic, and if you FMIL is going overboard, tell her you have to cut it off...period!

Edited to add: My guest list is 207, with a 140 guarantee, so we are in the same boat!

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

We have more in common than we know. I am in the same predicament. I'm still debating what to do so can't offer any help. Well, maybe. In my case, I might chancie it ( I think). Most people say 20% won't show up and while I disagree I'm going to believe it to be true. Good Luck!!!!

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

I am being very careful with my guest list. I cannot afford to invite everyone I have ever known. I will send out 140-150 invites but my goal to show up is 125-130. I would love it if only 115 showed up.

I am in the minority here, I am a big fan of smaller intimate gatherings.

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

Although you cannot rely on stats, they do say up to 30% of the guests on your wedding list will say no.

My room fit only 260 comfortable and our wedding list ended up being 364.

Our final count was 252, so I wouldn't worry about it.

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

I am having the same problem - my guarantee is 160 but right now, my WISH LIST guest list is 252!! I have highlighted those I could potentially leave out and I am still left with 200. I was calculating 10% for no's, but could I really do 20%? At 20% that would be perfect!

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

Don't worry I'm attending a wedding in March and they invited 380 !! I don't even know 1/2 that amount. Mine list is at 130

Edit to say: She had to cut it down because it was over 400!

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

I went to a wedding where 215 was invited, 180 rsvpd yes and only 150 ppl showed up.

I was upset for the bride.

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

We are close to 250

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

I dont think I would have 380 people if I invited my mailman and everyone from my kindergarden class that is a HUGE list.

OK, I feel better now. We still have to decide if we want to cut it down a little. I just dont want to feel panic with everyone who replies 'yes', thinking that I will be way over. We cannot afford that. Come to think of it, we cannot afford 150 either I thought that my cousins from CA who I have not seen since I had braces would never come. Well, they are coming. I am happy that they will be there, yet worried this will be a trend

I have MORE people on a 'B' list, we are having RSVP cards printed w. 2 dates so that we can fill in if people cannot make it (I know that sounds horrible, but what can I say, I am poor and cannot afford to invite everyone in the first round)

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

Honestly COUNT down your FMIL list. Tell her she can invite only a certain amount of people OR she can pay for her guest list. It is very fair.
Don't count on these people not coming or attending. You never know.

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

LMAO!! That's what I said!!

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

Uck, we have to finalize ours this weekend! We have a guarantee of 200 and our parents are paying for their guests, so that alleviates some of the stress. I think we're up to at least 250, probably more (the list is at home)...

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

Tell me about it.. I guaranteed 240 and I wish I have the exact 240 but would rather go a couple people under than more..

I also want to add that my gf invited over 500 people to her wedding and that to her surprise, the over seas family members, surprised her last minute and showed up! He final head count was 420!! I'd faint! lol


So far, I have invited 189 people (not including guests) so it adds up..

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

My FMIL is a sweet woman who seems to believe that the brides family should pay for everything. She will not let that go, and keeps piling on the guests, with the excuse that 'its too far, its the CITY, so no one will go'. Frankly, shes a pain in the a$$ about it, but I leave FH to deal with it.

Translation- he is afraid of his mom, so we are apparently stuck with her list. Thats what I get for marrying the youngest of 5.

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

This is the reason God created a B-list!! Don't stress it yet. I only have to guarantee 110 (and thats all I want at my wedding) but I have 158 people on my list-which will probably change once my FMIL starts thinking about how many relatives she forgot to invite! I'll send invites to people I want at my wedding first, and then later I'll send to the stupid people on my list that I'm forced to invite... and if they never receive their invitation... well thats the post office for you!

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

I have a 150 minimum and am inviting about 250 (expecting about 180-200). I made a spreadsheet and guessed who I though would/would not come and allowed people to add to the guest list until I got to 200 people.

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

you could..... not send STD's to those MIL out of town guests & significantly reduce the risk that they'd travel for your wedding on ... Is it Labor Day Weekend? ... last minute notice on those people might be good for you ... or is that possible?

BTW ... if you are getting married on a holiday weekend, you can def. count on more like 20% no's. Any big travel time is hard for people, then there's the kids going back to school etc.

You might be pleasantly surprised.

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

Don't feel bad. We are inviting 300 and guarenteed 250. I was not a happy camper when we did the guest list...but I have moved on.

Re: My scary guest list- how much is too much?

How about telling FMIL that your parents have given you a certain budget for all wedding expenses and you do not want to use it all for just the reception (remind her photo and video and flowers cost thousands each). Then tell her the solution was to cut the guest list and she can invite x amount of people. No more than her given number. And if she doesn't like that suggest she throw you and you FH a separate party for all her friends to come to!!!