My vent - feel free to add your own. Let it out sista.

Dear 'inch that i can pinch'

Please go away already! I don't understand why you are there! I have been eating healthy for months but you continue to stay! Haven't you ever heard of overstaying your welcome?? Be gone already!

Signed,

Frustrated in Forest Hills

---

Posted by Belongs2DanBuckley
I like this thread...we should def keep this one going

---

I agree, who doesn't love a good rant!!...and I may be able to keep it going with my FMIL stories alone (I'm sure there are more than a few who could...). This could be the thread that makes me go from lurker to poster. This might be a long one, sorry about that!

Dear FMIL,
Us girls who are with your sons already know that you have an obnoxious and shameless attachment to them. It's something we have dealt with so much that we've become used to it and usually it's more pathetic than mean and we can laugh it off. But that doesn't mean we don't get annoyed when you insist on hanging cheap, pharmacy store, 99 cent, nameless stockings for the girlfriends and fiancees when everyone in your family has elegant, embroidered stockings hanging RIGHT NEXT TO THEM.
Hello, you'd have to be an idiot not to know that it would be much classier to just hang nothing for the girls than to do that. We already know how you feel, no need to put up the bootleg stockings to emphasize our 'replaceability'!! And when your son tells you that hanging the cheap stockings is a tacky move (which is the same thing he told you last year when you first did it), 'you're not married yet' is a pathetic response when we've lived together for three years and he put a ring on my finger months ago (you know it's there, remember, you constantly make comments about how big it is and how lucky I am to have him). Sorry honey, I'm not going anywhere!!!
And while we're on the topic, stop pinning your weird overbearing 'frank and marie' behavior on being italian. That doesn't work when we both know your sauce comes from a jar!!!
Sincerely,
Your future DIL (like it or not) whose kitchen always has REAL food in it

---

Posted by parkgirl212

---

Posted by Belongs2DanBuckley
I like this thread...we should def keep this one going

---

I agree, who doesn't love a good rant!!...and I may be able to keep it going with my FMIL stories alone (I'm sure there are more than a few who could...). This could be the thread that makes me go from lurker to poster. This might be a long one, sorry about that!

Dear FMIL,
Us girls who are with your sons already know that you have an obnoxious and shameless attachment to them. It's something we have dealt with so much that we've become used to it and usually it's more pathetic than mean and we can laugh it off. But that doesn't mean we don't get annoyed when you insist on hanging cheap, pharmacy store, 99 cent, nameless stockings for the girlfriends and fiancees when everyone in your family has elegant, embroidered stockings hanging RIGHT NEXT TO THEM.
Hello, you'd have to be an idiot not to know that it would be much classier to just hang nothing for the girls than to do that. We already know how you feel, no need to put up the bootleg stockings to emphasize our 'replaceability'!! And when your son tells you that hanging the cheap stockings is a tacky move (which is the same thing he told you last year when you first did it), 'you're not married yet' is a pathetic response when we've lived together for three years and he put a ring on my finger months ago (you know it's there, remember, you constantly make comments about how big it is and how lucky I am to have him). Sorry honey, I'm not going anywhere!!!
And while we're on the topic, stop pinning your weird overbearing 'frank and marie' behavior on being italian. That doesn't work when we both know your sauce comes from a jar!!!
Sincerely,
Your future DIL (like it or not) whose kitchen always has REAL food in it

---

too funny

when i first read it - and you said stockings, i swear i thought you meant pantyhose - LOL
blonde moment

---

Posted by Soon2BMrsD

well im really glad u girls all get a kick out of my obsenities!!!..lol i get so mad and it just comes out funny.. im sure i can cook up another.. actually i have one now...

Dear FAT GIRL iN A LITTLE SHIRT, (it gets sung not just said u have to sing it)

Why oh why do u feel it is neccessary to let ur muffin top hang out??? no one else likes it but you.. its actually really disgusting they do sell clothes of all shapes and sizes im SURE they have something for you that will cover ur Chub-a-lub. This is directed to all girls who wear clothes 5 sizes too small.. even if ur a zero and wear you wear a 6 year olds clothes ITS STILL TOO SMALL COVER IT UP!!!!!!!

Hugs and kisses,
girl who wears clothes that FIT!

---

too effin' funny megan, im picturing tommy boy right now!!!! fat guy in little coat!!!!!!!!

---

Posted by beeinsilly

---

Posted by parkgirl212

---

Posted by Belongs2DanBuckley
I like this thread...we should def keep this one going

---

I agree, who doesn't love a good rant!!...and I may be able to keep it going with my FMIL stories alone (I'm sure there are more than a few who could...). This could be the thread that makes me go from lurker to poster. This might be a long one, sorry about that!

Dear FMIL,
Us girls who are with your sons already know that you have an obnoxious and shameless attachment to them. It's something we have dealt with so much that we've become used to it and usually it's more pathetic than mean and we can laugh it off. But that doesn't mean we don't get annoyed when you insist on hanging cheap, pharmacy store, 99 cent, nameless stockings for the girlfriends and fiancees when everyone in your family has elegant, embroidered stockings hanging RIGHT NEXT TO THEM.
Hello, you'd have to be an idiot not to know that it would be much classier to just hang nothing for the girls than to do that. We already know how you feel, no need to put up the bootleg stockings to emphasize our 'replaceability'!! And when your son tells you that hanging the cheap stockings is a tacky move (which is the same thing he told you last year when you first did it), 'you're not married yet' is a pathetic response when we've lived together for three years and he put a ring on my finger months ago (you know it's there, remember, you constantly make comments about how big it is and how lucky I am to have him). Sorry honey, I'm not going anywhere!!!
And while we're on the topic, stop pinning your weird overbearing 'frank and marie' behavior on being italian. That doesn't work when we both know your sauce comes from a jar!!!
Sincerely,
Your future DIL (like it or not) whose kitchen always has REAL food in it

---

too funny

when i first read it - and you said stockings, i swear i thought you meant pantyhose - LOL
blonde moment

---

lol sorry! should have specified christmas stockings!!!

---

Posted by parkgirl212

---

Posted by Belongs2DanBuckley
I like this thread...we should def keep this one going

---

I agree, who doesn't love a good rant!!...and I may be able to keep it going with my FMIL stories alone (I'm sure there are more than a few who could...). This could be the thread that makes me go from lurker to poster. This might be a long one, sorry about that!

Dear FMIL,
Us girls who are with your sons already know that you have an obnoxious and shameless attachment to them. It's something we have dealt with so much that we've become used to it and usually it's more pathetic than mean and we can laugh it off. But that doesn't mean we don't get annoyed when you insist on hanging cheap, pharmacy store, 99 cent, nameless stockings for the girlfriends and fiancees when everyone in your family has elegant, embroidered stockings hanging RIGHT NEXT TO THEM.
Hello, you'd have to be an idiot not to know that it would be much classier to just hang nothing for the girls than to do that. We already know how you feel, no need to put up the bootleg stockings to emphasize our 'replaceability'!! And when your son tells you that hanging the cheap stockings is a tacky move (which is the same thing he told you last year when you first did it), 'you're not married yet' is a pathetic response when we've lived together for three years and he put a ring on my finger months ago (you know it's there, remember, you constantly make comments about how big it is and how lucky I am to have him). Sorry honey, I'm not going anywhere!!!
And while we're on the topic, stop pinning your weird overbearing 'frank and marie' behavior on being italian. That doesn't work when we both know your sauce comes from a jar!!!
Sincerely,
Your future DIL (like it or not) whose kitchen always has REAL food in it

---

At least you get a stocking!! They didn't even get me a stocking! Everyone got really nice sparkly stockings with fun stuff and I got diddly

---

Posted by MikeandJess

---

Posted by parkgirl212

---

Posted by Belongs2DanBuckley
I like this thread...we should def keep this one going

---

I agree, who doesn't love a good rant!!...and I may be able to keep it going with my FMIL stories alone (I'm sure there are more than a few who could...). This could be the thread that makes me go from lurker to poster. This might be a long one, sorry about that!

Dear FMIL,
Us girls who are with your sons already know that you have an obnoxious and shameless attachment to them. It's something we have dealt with so much that we've become used to it and usually it's more pathetic than mean and we can laugh it off. But that doesn't mean we don't get annoyed when you insist on hanging cheap, pharmacy store, 99 cent, nameless stockings for the girlfriends and fiancees when everyone in your family has elegant, embroidered stockings hanging RIGHT NEXT TO THEM.
Hello, you'd have to be an idiot not to know that it would be much classier to just hang nothing for the girls than to do that. We already know how you feel, no need to put up the bootleg stockings to emphasize our 'replaceability'!! And when your son tells you that hanging the cheap stockings is a tacky move (which is the same thing he told you last year when you first did it), 'you're not married yet' is a pathetic response when we've lived together for three years and he put a ring on my finger months ago (you know it's there, remember, you constantly make comments about how big it is and how lucky I am to have him). Sorry honey, I'm not going anywhere!!!
And while we're on the topic, stop pinning your weird overbearing 'frank and marie' behavior on being italian. That doesn't work when we both know your sauce comes from a jar!!!
Sincerely,
Your future DIL (like it or not) whose kitchen always has REAL food in it

---

At least you get a stocking!! They didn't even get me a stocking! Everyone got really nice sparkly stockings with fun stuff and I got diddly

---

i will give you mine!!! lol. i know it's arguable which is worse, but for me, i would rather have none and keep my dignity...it looks so ridiculous, it's redonkulous. if i remember to take a pic next time i'm there i'll post it so you can see exactly how bad it looks.

any chance that your FH has all brothers? my friends and i talk about this a lot, and it seems like moms are more possessive when they have all boys. bad move if you ask me...don't they know that once their son picks a wife, the wife controls the parental visits...what holidays are where...who the grandkids like...and the seniors' home, if it comes to that...

---

Posted by parkgirl212

i will give you mine!!! lol. i know it's arguable which is worse, but for me, i would rather have none and keep my dignity...it looks so ridiculous, it's redonkulous. if i remember to take a pic next time i'm there i'll post it so you can see exactly how bad it looks.

any chance that your FH has all brothers? my friends and i talk about this a lot, and it seems like moms are more possessive when they have all boys. bad move if you ask me...don't they know that once their son picks a wife, the wife controls the parental visits...what holidays are where...who the grandkids like...and the seniors' home, if it comes to that...

---

Nope he has a step sister and a step brother on that side. Hmm I guess it doesn't help that I told them we're going to build a shed in the backyard for all the elderly parents when the time comes to them being too old to take care of themselves.

---

Posted by parkgirl212

PS - What would happen if your FH just brought a stocking there for you and hung it up? We have learned in the last few years that the best way to change their attitude is just to show that FH is not going to allow me to be disrespected or ignored (and when he did, it made it easier for his brothers and their sign others to do the same).

---

Not a bad plan but b/c he's a stepchild he does't have much pull

Dear My Right Eye,

The first day or two, you thought I wouldn't notice, didn't you? But now it's day three, and you're getting redder and puffier and I'm starting to look like Rocky Balboa in the last scene of 'Rocky' when he's fighting Apollo and he's so beat up, his eyelid is so bad he tells Mickey to 'cut it' and I cringe and freak out every time because it's all so gross. And now that's me! Without the 'Mick cutting it' part. So gross. Listen, I know it's tough for the two of us to communicate, so maybe tonight you can send me a dream or something and let me KNOW what the HECK i'm allergic to so I can avoid it and you can go back to being normal-sized and non-itchy. Please?

Thanks,
Me

---

Posted by MikeandJess

---

Posted by parkgirl212

i will give you mine!!! lol. i know it's arguable which is worse, but for me, i would rather have none and keep my dignity...it looks so ridiculous, it's redonkulous. if i remember to take a pic next time i'm there i'll post it so you can see exactly how bad it looks.

any chance that your FH has all brothers? my friends and i talk about this a lot, and it seems like moms are more possessive when they have all boys. bad move if you ask me...don't they know that once their son picks a wife, the wife controls the parental visits...what holidays are where...who the grandkids like...and the seniors' home, if it comes to that...

---

Nope he has a step sister and a step brother on that side. Hmm I guess it doesn't help that I told them we're going to build a shed in the backyard for all the elderly parents when the time comes to them being too old to take care of themselves.

---

love it!!!

awww to being a stepchild...i understand how that gets weird. love the shed thing though, def sounds like you stand up for yourself to them.

---

Posted by parkgirl212


love it!!!

awww to being a stepchild...i understand how that gets weird. love the shed thing though, def sounds like you stand up for yourself to them.

---

I really wish I could, that's just my sense of humor!

Dear Lovely Cranium of Mine,

There is only so much Excedrin a body can take. I dont know why you are in so much pain. I have taken very good care of you - exercise daily, wash you and brush you and keep you clean. I give you plenty of rest; at least I think I do. Can you please give me a clue as to why you are so much pain lately? In order for our relationship to continue, you must be honest with me and tell me what works an what doesnt - We cannot continue like this. It is not good for either one of us.

Please help!

Much Love,

The rest of your body

---

Posted by parkgirl212

---

Posted by MikeandJess

---

Posted by parkgirl212

---

Posted by Belongs2DanBuckley
I like this thread...we should def keep this one going

---

I agree, who doesn't love a good rant!!...and I may be able to keep it going with my FMIL stories alone (I'm sure there are more than a few who could...). This could be the thread that makes me go from lurker to poster. This might be a long one, sorry about that!

Dear FMIL,
Us girls who are with your sons already know that you have an obnoxious and shameless attachment to them. It's something we have dealt with so much that we've become used to it and usually it's more pathetic than mean and we can laugh it off. But that doesn't mean we don't get annoyed when you insist on hanging cheap, pharmacy store, 99 cent, nameless stockings for the girlfriends and fiancees when everyone in your family has elegant, embroidered stockings hanging RIGHT NEXT TO THEM.
Hello, you'd have to be an idiot not to know that it would be much classier to just hang nothing for the girls than to do that. We already know how you feel, no need to put up the bootleg stockings to emphasize our 'replaceability'!! And when your son tells you that hanging the cheap stockings is a tacky move (which is the same thing he told you last year when you first did it), 'you're not married yet' is a pathetic response when we've lived together for three years and he put a ring on my finger months ago (you know it's there, remember, you constantly make comments about how big it is and how lucky I am to have him). Sorry honey, I'm not going anywhere!!!
And while we're on the topic, stop pinning your weird overbearing 'frank and marie' behavior on being italian. That doesn't work when we both know your sauce comes from a jar!!!
Sincerely,
Your future DIL (like it or not) whose kitchen always has REAL food in it

---

At least you get a stocking!! They didn't even get me a stocking! Everyone got really nice sparkly stockings with fun stuff and I got diddly

---

i will give you mine!!! lol. i know it's arguable which is worse, but for me, i would rather have none and keep my dignity...it looks so ridiculous, it's redonkulous. if i remember to take a pic next time i'm there i'll post it so you can see exactly how bad it looks.

any chance that your FH has all brothers? my friends and i talk about this a lot, and it seems like moms are more possessive when they have all boys. bad move if you ask me...don't they know that once their son picks a wife, the wife controls the parental visits...what holidays are where...who the grandkids like...and the seniors' home, if it comes to that...

---

so true

FH only has a brother - we will be together NINE years in January - engaged for ONE year in December but I have a stocking. . . .just with my name spelled wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

---

Posted by MikeandJess

---

Posted by parkgirl212

---

Posted by Belongs2DanBuckley
I like this thread...we should def keep this one going

---

I agree, who doesn't love a good rant!!...and I may be able to keep it going with my FMIL stories alone (I'm sure there are more than a few who could...). This could be the thread that makes me go from lurker to poster. This might be a long one, sorry about that!

Dear FMIL,
Us girls who are with your sons already know that you have an obnoxious and shameless attachment to them. It's something we have dealt with so much that we've become used to it and usually it's more pathetic than mean and we can laugh it off. But that doesn't mean we don't get annoyed when you insist on hanging cheap, pharmacy store, 99 cent, nameless stockings for the girlfriends and fiancees when everyone in your family has elegant, embroidered stockings hanging RIGHT NEXT TO THEM.
Hello, you'd have to be an idiot not to know that it would be much classier to just hang nothing for the girls than to do that. We already know how you feel, no need to put up the bootleg stockings to emphasize our 'replaceability'!! And when your son tells you that hanging the cheap stockings is a tacky move (which is the same thing he told you last year when you first did it), 'you're not married yet' is a pathetic response when we've lived together for three years and he put a ring on my finger months ago (you know it's there, remember, you constantly make comments about how big it is and how lucky I am to have him). Sorry honey, I'm not going anywhere!!!
And while we're on the topic, stop pinning your weird overbearing 'frank and marie' behavior on being italian. That doesn't work when we both know your sauce comes from a jar!!!
Sincerely,
Your future DIL (like it or not) whose kitchen always has REAL food in it

---

At least you get a stocking!! They didn't even get me a stocking! Everyone got really nice sparkly stockings with fun stuff and I got diddly

---

i agree at least u get a stocking.. i get nada!!! at least ur inclueded.. im not family untill i get their last name.. and im constantly REMINDED of this at any time i step out of line and hint that im family!... im thinking of writing MOM AND DAD on their chirstmas gift this year just to make a point!

Dear chicken leg girl who wears spandex pants and drives a mercades,

I- H-A-T-E -Y-O-U!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Huges and kisses,
megs

---

Posted by Soon2BMrsD

Dear chicken leg girl who wears spandex pants and drives a mercades,

I- H-A-T-E -Y-O-U!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Huges and kisses,
megs

---

that is hysterical!!!

Lady supervising me at the food bank,

I have a name. It's Bonnie. Not 'the temp.' Next time you refer to me in this way I WILL correct you and make you look like a complete a$$hole. Also, your breath is horrifying.

Love,
the temp

Dear Citibank Credit Card,

Why must you tease me by sending me better offers for 0% APR when you KNOW that only weeks ago I sucumbed to one of your pathetic offers and did the balance transfer?! And WHY can't you take that card you sent me with the new balance transfer on it and extend the date to that of the offer you just sent me?! Do you enjoy tormenting those that are, as Carrie Bradshaw so elegantly put it, in a financial cul-de-sac??

Signed (& frustrated),
The girl driving circles in the financial cul-de-sac.