Name Change Problem

I am in a simliar situation. I am a graduate student working towards my Ph.D. in a research field and I will be publishing papers before we are married. I just do not feel right changeing my name before we are married to satisfy a tradiation. I also have worked so hard to get were I am, I do not want to be Dr. FH name, I have been in college for 7 years with my name and I will only be inschool for 3 years with his. I am taking his name socially, so I will be Mrs. FH name, but I think I am going to keep my last name for professional situations. There is only my sister and I and no males to pass on the name so this will be the last generation. I may hyphanate my professional name, but for publishing purposes and professional purposes it will be easier for me to remain consistant. My FH was upset about my decision at first but I expalined how I felt and he is ok with it know. It bothers me that in the future when I do have me Ph.D. and we get mail as a couple it would say Dr. and Mrs. FH name if I take his name. They always assume the the male has the Ph.D. and not the female. This bothers me so I decided that it would be easy to keep them seperate.

I won't change my name

July3Bride, I am also not willing to change my name, but thankfully my FH is completely understanding. To me, this is a really important issue, and had he not been understanding I may have gone the way of using my name professionally and his name personally. Good luck, I know this must be very difficult.

Michele31 I agree with you completey. Well said. *NM*

I'm Not sure WHAT to do :(

At the beginning I was willing to take my FI lst name. Then my father passed away. And We were talking about taking my last name. Then his father passed and he is insistant on keeping his last name and having me take his last name. We both agreed we want the SAME last name, but we are not sure what to do. He has a brother with his last name so at least he can carry the name on. I only have a sister. what a mess!!