NWR: stay at home Mom

I will if we open up a business and have money coming in from elsewhere and me handling things for the business this way my schedule can be flexible.

FH makes good money and we could live off his salary but personally i would like to also have my own income coming in.

I also think about what happens when the kids start going to school.

I kinda do want to stay home and not work but with no kids , but then again I like to be out and about and at work

NY is to darn expensive for the mom to stay at home these days!
Hopefully my job will let me work from home part time, that would be ideal

FMIL watches FSIL's baby while she and her husband are at work.....in the beginning FSIL used to cry everyday when she had to leave her 2 month old baby to go back to work.....it was really sad.....I don't know how FSIL does it......I think I would be jealous if my Mom got to spend more time with my baby than me......I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

But at the same time, I am nervous to stay home....I don't want FH to feel jealous that I get to stay home with our children when they are babies...and I don't know how I would feel asking FH for money or him giving me an allowance I would HATE that!!

I don't know there are so many variables! Its crazy!

---

Posted by Future Mulligan

I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

---

This is exactly how I feel. I'm glad I'm not alone.

---

Posted by Future Mulligan

FMIL watches FSIL's baby while she and her husband are at work.....in the beginning FSIL used to cry everyday when she had to leave her 2 month old baby to go back to work.....it was really sad.....I don't know how FSIL does it......I think I would be jealous if my Mom got to spend more time with my baby than me......I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

But at the same time, I am nervous to stay home....I don't want FH to feel jealous that I get to stay home with our children when they are babies...and I don't know how I would feel asking FH for money or him giving me an allowance I would HATE that!!

I don't know there are so many variables! Its crazy!

---

It's not jsut him being jealous of you staying home. I think at some point you might be jealous of him going out and getting to interact with adults all day. I know that sounds crazy, and that most people would love to stay home everyday, but I think after a while it would drive me banana's listening to Dora and barney all day with no adult interaction, KWIM?

---

Posted by yelley77
I think after a while it would drive me banana's listening to Dora and barney all day with no adult interaction, KWIM?

---

I agree. I'm going to join every goddamn mommy and me that I can find.

---

Posted by AmandaLynn04

---

Posted by Future Mulligan

I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

---

This is exactly how I feel. I'm glad I'm not alone.

---

but if this was the case then only the people who can afford to have someone stay at home would have children. That's not right either.

---

Posted by Future Mulligan

FMIL watches FSIL's baby while she and her husband are at work.....in the beginning FSIL used to cry everyday when she had to leave her 2 month old baby to go back to work.....it was really sad.....I don't know how FSIL does it......I think I would be jealous if my Mom got to spend more time with my baby than me......I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

But at the same time, I am nervous to stay home....I don't want FH to feel jealous that I get to stay home with our children when they are babies...and I don't know how I would feel asking FH for money or him giving me an allowance I would HATE that!!

I don't know there are so many variables! Its crazy!

---

i think that is something i wouldn't like, having to ask for money to buy things

---

Posted by AmandaLynn04

---

Posted by Future Mulligan

I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

---

This is exactly how I feel. I'm glad I'm not alone.

---

Because its financially impossible to adequately care for the child?

I mean, I just think this is such a personal decision. People have different financial situations and people have different reasoning for not being a SAHM. While I am not one of these people, many friends of mine had both parents working and they turned out to be perfectly well adjusted people.

So I don't really think its fair to say that if you aren't home with your children that you shouldn't have them at all. Sometimes it's just not possible.

---

Posted by yelley77

---

Posted by Future Mulligan

FMIL watches FSIL's baby while she and her husband are at work.....in the beginning FSIL used to cry everyday when she had to leave her 2 month old baby to go back to work.....it was really sad.....I don't know how FSIL does it......I think I would be jealous if my Mom got to spend more time with my baby than me......I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

But at the same time, I am nervous to stay home....I don't want FH to feel jealous that I get to stay home with our children when they are babies...and I don't know how I would feel asking FH for money or him giving me an allowance I would HATE that!!

I don't know there are so many variables! Its crazy!

---

It's not jsut him being jealous of you staying home. I think at some point you might be jealous of him going out and getting to interact with adults all day. I know that sounds crazy, and that most people would love to stay home everyday, but I think after a while it would drive me banana's listening to Dora and barney all day with no adult interaction, KWIM?

---

Ohh yeah definitley.....I probably will be jealous - and I am worried because when we move we will both work in the beginning - but when I stop working I'm afraid that I will lose friends - because most likely I'll meet my new friends from my job and when I have a baby and leave work that might change and I won't have friends anymore
FH will still be working and meeting people and I'll be all alone

---

Posted by beachbum05

---

Posted by AmandaLynn04

---

Posted by Future Mulligan

I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

---

This is exactly how I feel. I'm glad I'm not alone.

---

Because its financially impossible to adequately care for the child?

I mean, I just think this is such a personal decision. People have different financial situations and people have different reasoning for not being a SAHM. While I am not one of these people, many friends of mine had both parents working and they turned out to be perfectly well adjusted people.

So I don't really think its fair to say that if you aren't home with your children that you shouldn't have them at all. Sometimes it's just not possible.

---

wow bon we are on the same page

---

Posted by yelley77

---

Posted by Future Mulligan

FMIL watches FSIL's baby while she and her husband are at work.....in the beginning FSIL used to cry everyday when she had to leave her 2 month old baby to go back to work.....it was really sad.....I don't know how FSIL does it......I think I would be jealous if my Mom got to spend more time with my baby than me......I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

But at the same time, I am nervous to stay home....I don't want FH to feel jealous that I get to stay home with our children when they are babies...and I don't know how I would feel asking FH for money or him giving me an allowance I would HATE that!!

I don't know there are so many variables! Its crazy!

---

It's not jsut him being jealous of you staying home. I think at some point you might be jealous of him going out and getting to interact with adults all day. I know that sounds crazy, and that most people would love to stay home everyday, but I think after a while it would drive me banana's listening to Dora and barney all day with no adult interaction, KWIM?

---

SOOOO true, i saw a study on this on 20/20...they interviewed a bunch of working mothers and stay at home moms and followed them around. The sahm's were all together in a group being asked questions and same with working moms....one thing SAHM's said was that they missed having regular adult conversations and do get jealous that their husbands do have this, they have their time away from the home and interraction with adults

---

Posted by beachbum05

---

Posted by AmandaLynn04

---

Posted by Future Mulligan

I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

---

This is exactly how I feel. I'm glad I'm not alone.

---

Because its financially impossible to adequately care for the child?

I mean, I just think this is such a personal decision. People have different financial situations and people have different reasoning for not being a SAHM. While I am not one of these people, many friends of mine had both parents working and they turned out to be perfectly well adjusted people.

So I don't really think its fair to say that if you aren't home with your children that you shouldn't have them at all. Sometimes it's just not possible.

---

I didnt mean that in a bad way.....Just for me, I wouldnt want to have a child IF I couldn't raise them....I don't see a point in having my Mom raise my child - she already did her job - she raised me - I don't think its fair to her to have to start all over again with a new baby when her kids are finally grown up! That is why I am marrying a man with the same view as me AND that is why we are moving somewhere that we can afford that lifestyle. For other people they don't mind putting their kids in daycare, or getting a nanny or family member to watch their children - but I rather not do that.

---

Posted by MikeandJess

---

Posted by AmandaLynn04

---

Posted by Future Mulligan

I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

---

This is exactly how I feel. I'm glad I'm not alone.

---

but if this was the case then only the people who can afford to have someone stay at home would have children. That's not right either.

---

No, it's not right. But, what I am saying, is that I am willing to do whatever it takes to stay at home. If I have to live in a smaller house, or buy a used car, or cut coupons like a crazy woman and shop at discount stores, that's what I will do. That's not a decision that everyone will make, but, that's what is right for me.

I worked at a day care, and I would see these parents roll up in their 7 series, at 7am to drop off, and then at 6pm to pick up.

If you can afford a 7 series, and day care, you can afford a Ford and to stay at home. I think a lot of the time it comes down to choices, and people often choose to have really nice things, and send their kids to day care, instead of do without some nice things, and stay home. That's basically all I'm saying.

My mom is retired and FMIL says she will retire...when we have children
but I will still stay home...I'd rather raise my own children for my own reasons lol

I was raised by my grandmother- and im so thankful for having a close relationship with her but I really did miss my mom..My mom tells me today...she should have spent more time with us when we were younger...she worked too much. (she had to, they werent financially able)

Its a double edged sword.

---

Posted by beachbum05

---

Posted by AmandaLynn04

---

Posted by Future Mulligan

I feel like, why have a baby if someone else has to take care of it ??

---

This is exactly how I feel. I'm glad I'm not alone.

---

Because its financially impossible to adequately care for the child?

I mean, I just think this is such a personal decision. People have different financial situations and people have different reasoning for not being a SAHM. While I am not one of these people, many friends of mine had both parents working and they turned out to be perfectly well adjusted people.

So I don't really think its fair to say that if you aren't home with your children that you shouldn't have them at all. Sometimes it's just not possible.

---

I agree, its one thing if you leave your kids with somebody else all the time, even at nights so you can go out and on weekends but during the day to go to work is something different. Honestly either way you look at it theres pros and cons. I know ppl who loved that their mom stayed home, i also know someone who says she was always embarassed that her mom didn't work and when kids at school would talk about their moms careers they'd feel left out. You just have to do whats right for you.

i think whether we continue working or not its still going to be hard and crazy! im going to be REALLY nervous when we are ready to start a family!