Official thread for those who have LOST PARENT(s)....

---

Posted by hannahshim

great thread..
I need help actually

I'm not sure what I am going to do.. I lost my father 2 years ago and my moms been out of my life since i was 2 or 3.. I've only maybe been with her like 3years out of my whole life and shes remarried in Korea... I wanted to do a little memorial thing for my father but my sister and brother doesnt think it will be fair to our 'Step father'............. my mother said shes coming down for my wedding and that my step father will walk me down..... everyone thinks it the right thing for him to walk me down but i feel like its not fair to my father that passed....I've meet my step father before and he is super nice but its just not the same....... you know what I'm saying? I rather have my brother walk me down but people think its not right since hes younger than me and I do have a step father....

is anyone in my situation or close to it??
if there is anyone pleaseee HELP ME..

I feel like im going to let someone down either way i go

---

do you have a relationship with your step father? if you don't, i don't see why he should walk you down the aisle, JMO. if you're closer to your brother, i think it's perfectly acceptable for him to walk you down, his age shouldn't matter one bit. you should do what is best for you, not the other people there. i hope it all works out.

---

Posted by SB7308

---

Posted by JOANNENBRIAN

---

Posted by SB7308

FH mom passed away 4 yrs ago before I met her. I made lapel pin with a picture of her that he will wear. We are also having a memory candle with her and other family members names on it.

---

where did you get the pin made ? TIA

---

Ebay!!!! The seller was wonderful to work with. Really helped out b/c the pic I emailed her was very dark and she lightened it.

---

that's a great idea!

would having 2 look bad? i'd want one for my mom, and one for my grandmother who was like a 2nd mother to me.

---

Posted by KarinAmanda

---

Posted by hannahshim

great thread..
I need help actually

I'm not sure what I am going to do.. I lost my father 2 years ago and my moms been out of my life since i was 2 or 3.. I've only maybe been with her like 3years out of my whole life and shes remarried in Korea... I wanted to do a little memorial thing for my father but my sister and brother doesnt think it will be fair to our 'Step father'............. my mother said shes coming down for my wedding and that my step father will walk me down..... everyone thinks it the right thing for him to walk me down but i feel like its not fair to my father that passed.... I rather have my brother walk me down but people think its not right since hes younger than me and I do have a step father....

is anyone in my situation or close to it??
if there is anyone pleaseee HELP ME..

I feel like im going to let someone down either way i go

---

i think that you need to remember 1 thing - this is your wedding and ultimately this is your decision. you need to do what you feel in your heart. i think that if i were in your position, I would have my brother walk me down. are you close with your step-father? just my opinion, but remember, this is your day and you need to do what makes your comfortable regardless of what others may say or think. you have lost already and they need to recognize how hard it will already be

---

i agree 100% it is your choice, whoever makes you feel more comfortable you already went through alot already by losing someone. I think your bro should walk you down JMO though

---

Posted by teenigrrl

---

Posted by SB7308

---

Posted by JOANNENBRIAN

---

Posted by SB7308

FH mom passed away 4 yrs ago before I met her. I made lapel pin with a picture of her that he will wear. We are also having a memory candle with her and other family members names on it.

---

where did you get the pin made ? TIA

---

Ebay!!!! The seller was wonderful to work with. Really helped out b/c the pic I emailed her was very dark and she lightened it.

---

that's a great idea!

would having 2 look bad? i'd want one for my mom, and one for my grandmother who was like a 2nd mother to me.

---

Well I'm not wearing it, FH will be. I dont think 2 would look bad. He can wear one on each side of the tux.

FMIL passed away when FH was little but we wanted to incorporate her into the service...we're going to have FFIL light a candle and place a wreath around it at the beginning of the pass during the procession to symbolize her presence and FFIL will light the unity candle from that.

We're going to do a memorial candle area for her as well as some people in my family that were special to me that are gone.

I'm carrying Gardenias in my bo-k because they were her fav. The wreath for her memorial will also be ivy and gardenias.

I think i might get a charm made up for my bo-k with a locket of her and my grandmother in it...i do like the pin idea though...that's really beautiful!

I also saw something for Irish brides here....

Pocket locket for Irish brides

I think someone posted this a while ago....

---

Posted by KarinAmanda

---

Posted by hannahshim

great thread..
I need help actually

I'm not sure what I am going to do.. I lost my father 2 years ago and my moms been out of my life since i was 2 or 3.. I've only maybe been with her like 3years out of my whole life and shes remarried in Korea... I wanted to do a little memorial thing for my father but my sister and brother doesnt think it will be fair to our 'Step father'............. my mother said shes coming down for my wedding and that my step father will walk me down..... everyone thinks it the right thing for him to walk me down but i feel like its not fair to my father that passed.... I rather have my brother walk me down but people think its not right since hes younger than me and I do have a step father....

is anyone in my situation or close to it??
if there is anyone pleaseee HELP ME..

I feel like im going to let someone down either way i go

---

i think that you need to remember 1 thing - this is your wedding and ultimately this is your decision. you need to do what you feel in your heart. i think that if i were in your position, I would have my brother walk me down. are you close with your step-father? just my opinion, but remember, this is your day and you need to do what makes your comfortable regardless of what others may say or think. you have lost already and they need to recognize how hard it will already be

---

thanks for your word of advice I really appreciate it.. well i keep my distance since I dont know him THAT well but he is super nice and he does try.. but i've only seen him a few times.. I want everyone to be happy... but in order to make everyone happy I have to sacrifice my feelings but im not sure I can do that... its alot easier said then done... and also I dont want to hurt my moms feels.. regardless if she never helped when things were tough(she must had her reasons)
my sister doesnt think I should put a memorial for my father because its a day of celebration.. in a way I feel like shes right..but in a way he is the one that took care of us our whole life.. he deicated his whole life to us kids.. he only wanted the best for us.. this is making me sad & depressed.... its always hard bring up my father..

---

Posted by hannahshim

---

Posted by KarinAmanda

---

Posted by hannahshim

great thread..
I need help actually

I'm not sure what I am going to do.. I lost my father 2 years ago and my moms been out of my life since i was 2 or 3.. I've only maybe been with her like 3years out of my whole life and shes remarried in Korea... I wanted to do a little memorial thing for my father but my sister and brother doesnt think it will be fair to our 'Step father'............. my mother said shes coming down for my wedding and that my step father will walk me down..... everyone thinks it the right thing for him to walk me down but i feel like its not fair to my father that passed.... I rather have my brother walk me down but people think its not right since hes younger than me and I do have a step father....

is anyone in my situation or close to it??
if there is anyone pleaseee HELP ME..

I feel like im going to let someone down either way i go

---

i think that you need to remember 1 thing - this is your wedding and ultimately this is your decision. you need to do what you feel in your heart. i think that if i were in your position, I would have my brother walk me down. are you close with your step-father? just my opinion, but remember, this is your day and you need to do what makes your comfortable regardless of what others may say or think. you have lost already and they need to recognize how hard it will already be

---

thanks for your word of advice I really appreciate it.. well i keep my distance since I dont know him THAT well but he is super nice and he does try.. but i've only seen him a few times.. I want everyone to be happy... but in order to make everyone happy I have to sacrifice my feelings but im not sure I can do that... its alot easier said then done... and also I dont want to hurt my moms feels.. regardless if she never helped when things were tough(she must had her reasons)
my sister doesnt think I should put a memorial for my father because its a day of celebration.. in a way I feel like shes right..but in a way he is the one that took care of us our whole life.. he deicated his whole life to us kids.. he only wanted the best for us.. this is making me sad & depressed.... its always hard bring up my father..

---

i agree about the day of celebration part BUT keep in mind, you can put together a montage celebrating your dad and the relationship that the two of had. keep the pictures happy, happy uplifting music, make people laugh. i am going to try and make mine this way, it was the same at his funeral. we celebrated his LIFE

hugs for all of you- I hope you dont mind me dropping in- but fh's dad past away and I wanted to find a special way to include his dad in our wedding

---

Posted by futuremrsfab

hugs for all of you- I hope you dont mind me dropping in- but fh's dad past away and I wanted to find a special way to include his dad in our wedding

---

you are more than welcome and for you and FH

---

Posted by DnellD809

My mom passed away 3 years ago. When she got married she had a special dance with her mom to Helen Reddy's-You and me Against the World. It was all of ours song for eachother. So I was going to dance with her to it at my wedding as well as a different song with my dad. Since she passed away I am going to use that song for my father daughter dance. Everyone in the family knows it was our song so I think it'll be really special...it's just going to be really hard for me to hold back the tears!

---

i hear ya sista, the tears will be flowing!

---

Posted by KarinAmanda

---

Posted by DnellD809

My mom passed away 3 years ago. When she got married she had a special dance with her mom to Helen Reddy's-You and me Against the World. It was all of ours song for eachother. So I was going to dance with her to it at my wedding as well as a different song with my dad. Since she passed away I am going to use that song for my father daughter dance. Everyone in the family knows it was our song so I think it'll be really special...it's just going to be really hard for me to hold back the tears!

---

i hear ya sista, the tears will be flowing!

---

That's for sure! I mean the whole day alone is going to be emotional. I know it's supposed to be a happy day and it will be but I know I'm going to be so sad that she's not there.

---

Posted by DnellD809

---

Posted by KarinAmanda

---

Posted by DnellD809

My mom passed away 3 years ago. When she got married she had a special dance with her mom to Helen Reddy's-You and me Against the World. It was all of ours song for eachother. So I was going to dance with her to it at my wedding as well as a different song with my dad. Since she passed away I am going to use that song for my father daughter dance. Everyone in the family knows it was our song so I think it'll be really special...it's just going to be really hard for me to hold back the tears!

---

i hear ya sista, the tears will be flowing!

---

That's for sure! I mean the whole day alone is going to be emotional. I know it's supposed to be a happy day and it will be but I know I'm going to be so sad that she's not there.

---

thats soooooo special~~~
I'm sure everyone will get all teary

My father passed away this year. Its obivously been very difficult for my family. He was sick for a very long time and I truly feel that he did not pass until he knew that I found my soulmate. Dan asked for his permission to marry me before he passed and he knew I was truly happy and going to be taken care of. In honor of him at our wedding, Dan and I will be dancing to 'Keeper of the Stars' for the father daughter dance while in the background the tv screens will be posting pics of my dad and us.
I think it will be very special.

---

Posted by treesh37

My father passed away this year. Its obivously been very difficult for my family. He was sick for a very long time and I truly feel that he did not pass until he knew that I found my soulmate. Dan asked for his permission to marry me before he passed and he knew I was truly happy and going to be taken care of. In honor of him at our wedding, Dan and I will be dancing to 'Keeper of the Stars' for the father daughter dance while in the background the tv screens will be posting pics of my dad and us.
I think it will be very special.

---

That's so sweet! It's for sure going to be a really special moment you'll never forget!!!

My father passed away a year and a half ago very unexepectedly in an accident. We are going to have a memorial candle that me and my sister (MOH) will light while a poem that was read at my parents wedding is read. My cousin, who has always been like a brother to me, is walking me down the aisle.

I was thinking of doing a dance with my mother to one of my dad's favorite songs. But I don't think I am going to announce it or anything because I don't want to get too sad.

WOW...seriously...I'm crying at my desk right now....I think all of your ideas are wonderful! What a great tribute seriously...I think they would be very proud of you all

My dad passed away just before my 18th birthday and I really miss him. As my wedding day approach, I find myself crying more but I find strength from all the beautiful memories we shared. I am not quite sure how I will incorporate him into one of the most special days of my life, but one thing for sure, I am certain that he will be there. I found a link where you can have cufflinks customized with a picture but I guess that would be great for a groom that has lost a loved one.

I have to say that I have an awesome step dad and there is no doubt that he will be walking me down the aisle. However, I have decided to skip the bride/dad dance, as it will be too overwhelming for me.

Here is the link:

LINK

I'm just dropping in to say I'm very sorry to all those that lost someone..remember your loved ones are forever alive in your hearts..hugs