So its final....the wedding is being called off and I dropped off an application for an apartement for him yesterday.
I just can't bring myself to stay in this marriage anymore and our first wedding was so simple, just us, that I really wanted to create such wonderful memories at this one and I don't see that happening the way I always wanted....so I've decided to end it now.
I know that I deserve more and he isn't a bad man at all, he is just not the family type. My daughters aren't happy and I'm not happy and frankly I don't think he is either. I have definetly learned that no matter how much money you have, it cannot buy your happiness. I hear people saying how if they had his money they be so happy, but its wrong! All I have is money, not emotional support, not a loving atmosphere, not a shoulder to cry on, not a friend, it is horrible!
I don't wan to end up like my mother or my aunt who stayed in loveless marriages for too long and although my mom got out...my aunt has wasted 43 years never feeling loved. I can't see myself doing that without going completely insane! We tried couselling, granted only twice, but not that I expected a full 360 but I did expect a glimmer of hope, something. I got nothing until I told him it was over and he needed to go, but now its almost too little too late. He is being a completely different person now, but I can't believe that it is genuine since we have gone through this before and it doesn't last. I think that once he is out of the house, he'll realize that its the best thing for both of us! I just know that I can't live like this anymore.
I know that there is someone out there willing to treat me like the princess I am and not take me for granted and that I won't take for granted.
So as far as the wedding goes, I think that I am going to have a big old party...I mean why lose all this money, I only owe a few vendors a few dollars now and I can always just cut the packages to fit in what I already gave them! So I am looking to host a fundraiser so if anyone knows of a child who needs help please FM me!
We are trying to separate on as good of terms as possible. It is working ok for now but next week may be different and he can be back to his old self all over again...so wish me luck. I'll still be lurking around these boards because honestly, it keeps me sane!
Thank you everyone for everything! You have been wonderful during all of this and I couldn't get through it without LIW!
SusiBtoM
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Melissa,
Keep us posted on your fundraiser. I'd like to make a contribution to whatever cause you chose, and I would like to make that contribution in your honor, for your strength and for your courage.
LuckyMe
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Im so sorry I know you've been struggling with this for awhile. I hope it all works out. Maybe you should continue the couseling with out of the house. If you ever need to talk feel free to FM.
enewedding
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I wish you the best of luck in life. You will meet someone that will treat you the way that you deserve to be treated. It may be hard going at first but dont give up or give in. mr right will come. dont settle for mr right-now.
I am sure that if you FM Ron or Kim they can help you with finding a worthy person for your good deed.
LuckiestGirl
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I am so sorry, but you know what is best for you and you know what you deserve. Good luck in your future and I know one day you will find true happiness!
B22
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I am SO very proud of you....
and would love to help you turn this into a fundraiser... just let me know if you need anything!!
Mooshyboo
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awwwww ~ I am sooooooo sorrrrrry ~ But it sounds to me that you are doing what is best for you and your girls... Stay in touch!
(I have read your past posts and responded & they seemed like you were still confused & this post sounds like you are firm and have really thought it out and decided this is the best thing for you and your girls!) Hang in there... Keep us posted on how you are doing ~ Here are some and for you during this time!
menc
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You are a strong women. Sorry for your hard times, but you are doing the right thing and you should be proud of yourself. I think havinga fundraiser is an awesome idea. You have many wonderful things to look ahead to in your life and most importantly you have your girls. Good luck with everything
soon2BMrsDee
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It is a bitter-sweet ending... you are realizing something that it take others years or decades to come to grips with... I commend you for that. I wish nothing but the best for you and your daughters. And for you, love and happiness within yourself and with another.
Saram
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im so sorry that its not working out for u...i think u are so wonderful to use your hall for a charity event...this just shows what a kind and generous person u are...u deserve someone who will appreciate u for who u are...good luck to u and your daughters...
Colette
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I am so so sorry, I think you've made a very BRAVE decision, and I know the result will be worth it. Your daughters are REALLY learning something priceless through your actions - I hope that helps you during the toughest times even a little... Please keep posting, let us know how you are doing!!! And I'd love to hear all about your fundraiser - what a generous and beautiful action on your part Getting to this decision was so hard, and I believe this is part of a bigger plan for you... and I wish you well on your road to healing and happiness :)
sweetdreamz1181
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i am very happy you were able to make your decision....... that is such a nice thing to do for a child.. most people wouldnt do something like that..... good luck and i hope you find that man that will treat you like a princess
jtgarsik
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I am so sorry to hear you are going through this and i'm offereing lots of hugs, support, and prayer! at the same time - I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!!!!! This is something that so many people settle with because it takes an enormous amount of strength and perserverance...and i am so happy that you are pressing forward to a beautiful future for you & your daughters!!!!! YOU GO GIRL!!!! We are all here for you with plenty of love & support I do know of a family & and an organization that are in dire need of fundraising - so if you havent decided on one yet, I will put some imformation together and FM it your way (ps: i think it's wonderful that you are going ahead with the fundraiser)....I wish u all the best!
SylvieB
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I never responded to any of your other posts but I did read and really prayed for you and thought of you several times over the last couple of weeks.
You should be extremly proud of yourself!! Your girls will be in functional, productive, healthy relationships b/c you had enough strength to leave a situation that although was not abusive, was not healthy for you or them. Having my daughter was what made me leave a relationship that was very similar to yours. He loved me as best as he was able to. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough for me. My motivation was my girl and the thought of her witnessing this loveless relationship for the rest of her life and then repeating the cycle. I wanted better for her. My story had a happy ending and so will yours!! Congratulations!!!
Edited to add: BTW, the fundraiser idea is awesome!! Good Luck & best wishes to you and your girls!
Mich0621
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OMG, so sorry
LitBallerinaGirl
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Sounds like you'll be fine. Good Luck to you. You definitely made the right decision.
BrideInBlue
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I am so sorry that you have to go this difficult situation. It is a very brave thing to make a choice like this but you deserve better and I'm sure you will find that perfect someone who treats you like a goddess. I think that by wanting to use this chance to throw a fundraiser you are proving how strong you really are.
I sent you can FM with information about a sick baby in need as a possible candidate for your fundraiser. NO matter what the cause i'm sure it will be a success!
Autumn08
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I'm sorry you are going through this but you sound like you have a good head on your shoulders.
TrueLoveIn2008
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So sorry it has come to this, but as everyone else has said, I am proud of you for making this decision for you and your girls. AWESOME move with the fundraiser - please keep us posted!!!
Jenny
Mizzdimple
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im so sorry but it sounds like this is a good thing for you.
luna bride x
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i'm so sorry.. but i think you're doing a great thing for yourself.. and as for the fundraiser.. i think you're amazing for doing that!