Please help with maitre'd tipping question

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Posted by LRR223

what about your banquet manager? the suggested tip for our maitre d was about $3-4 per person (we'll be having about 190) and then the bridal attendant, and then another 'suggested' tip for our manager....anyone else doing this????

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They told us the maitre'd splits it with the wait staff and the chef. I personally never heard of tipping the chef, but then again this is my first wedding lol. I don't remember him saying anything about the bridal attendent so I'm assuming that is not included. Is the banquet manager the person you signed the contract with?

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Posted by cbcf

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Posted by futuremrsfab

This is a dumb question- but does the maitre'd keep the whole tip or does he split it with the waiters- we were gonna tip the $3-$5 range, but we thought that they also paid the waiters with that money

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i think some halls might say they split it, but i know my sister did alot of weddings as a waitress (she was mostly a bridal attendant) but she did wait staff and they never saw any of that tip the maitre'd got

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Thanks Catie- I had a feeling thats how it was- so in that case we will probably tip the maitre'd a little less & tip the waiters/waitresses individually

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Posted by futuremrsfab

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Posted by cbcf

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Posted by futuremrsfab

This is a dumb question- but does the maitre'd keep the whole tip or does he split it with the waiters- we were gonna tip the $3-$5 range, but we thought that they also paid the waiters with that money

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i think some halls might say they split it, but i know my sister did alot of weddings as a waitress (she was mostly a bridal attendant) but she did wait staff and they never saw any of that tip the maitre'd got

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Thanks Catie- I had a feeling thats how it was- so in that case we will probably tip the maitre'd a little less & tip the waiters/waitresses individually

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your welcome!!! yeah it's funny because i was talking to my sister about this the other night and she was like WAIT WHAT you are going to tip the maitre'd $4 per person...she said def not and that they don't even split it with the wait staff...

so i am doing what you are doing as well...giving about $2-3 per person to the maitre'd and then tipping the wait staff as well

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Posted by kristin597

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Posted by LRR223

what about your banquet manager? the suggested tip for our maitre d was about $3-4 per person (we'll be having about 190) and then the bridal attendant, and then another 'suggested' tip for our manager....anyone else doing this????

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They told us the maitre'd splits it with the wait staff and the chef. I personally never heard of tipping the chef, but then again this is my first wedding lol. I don't remember him saying anything about the bridal attendent so I'm assuming that is not included. Is the banquet manager the person you signed the contract with?

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yep....we've gone over all the details with him so far....we don't even meet the maitre d until the day of the wedding (which is normal, right?)....if anything, i feel like the manager should get more of a tip than the MD...thoughts anyone?

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Posted by LRR223

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Posted by kristin597

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Posted by LRR223

what about your banquet manager? the suggested tip for our maitre d was about $3-4 per person (we'll be having about 190) and then the bridal attendant, and then another 'suggested' tip for our manager....anyone else doing this????

---

They told us the maitre'd splits it with the wait staff and the chef. I personally never heard of tipping the chef, but then again this is my first wedding lol. I don't remember him saying anything about the bridal attendent so I'm assuming that is not included. Is the banquet manager the person you signed the contract with?

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yep....we've gone over all the details with him so far....we don't even meet the maitre d until the day of the wedding (which is normal, right?)....if anything, i feel like the manager should get more of a tip than the MD...thoughts anyone?

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Well, I have a final appt next week and it is with the maitre'd. He is going to go over some specifics I guess. I thought the managers got a commission of sorts.

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Posted by kristin597

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Posted by LRR223

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Posted by kristin597

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Posted by LRR223

what about your banquet manager? the suggested tip for our maitre d was about $3-4 per person (we'll be having about 190) and then the bridal attendant, and then another 'suggested' tip for our manager....anyone else doing this????

---

They told us the maitre'd splits it with the wait staff and the chef. I personally never heard of tipping the chef, but then again this is my first wedding lol. I don't remember him saying anything about the bridal attendent so I'm assuming that is not included. Is the banquet manager the person you signed the contract with?

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yep....we've gone over all the details with him so far....we don't even meet the maitre d until the day of the wedding (which is normal, right?)....if anything, i feel like the manager should get more of a tip than the MD...thoughts anyone?

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Well, I have a final appt next week and it is with the maitre'd. He is going to go over some specifics I guess. I thought the managers got a commission of sorts.

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hmmm....very interesting.....i'm def going to call my place and see if we do that (meet w/ the md). thanks for your help!

Now Im confused!! Do we tip the Banquet Manager too?????

Glad there is a post about this, i had a screaming match about this with my dad . In my contract 800 is alloted for tips , my dad thinks this includes the maitre's , I don't . I will have to call them and ask

NOT tipping banquet manager , just not necessary . the madness of spending needs to end somewhere

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Posted by kslmbuggie

$2-$3pp is a good amount. Who said they split with the wait staff? Isnt the wait staff supposed to be paid from the B-S 20% gratuity they add on2 the bill?

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FH's niece is waitstaff at an RH and she told me they don't see any gratuity..not even the extra 20% we get charged. They only get tips if the people at the table actually tip them. i was soo shocked when she told me this. I thought that the 20% was to cover their tip.

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Posted by wifetobe

Now Im confused!! Do we tip the Banquet Manager too?????

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i've never heard of having to tip the Banquet Manager.

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Posted by kristin597

See this is what I was thinking originally, like $3-4 per person, maybe a bit more if I really felt that he was great. My RH told me that they 'recommend' giving $1000

My FH thought I was having a stroke bc I could barely speak, lol.

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OMG!!! That is crazy. I suggest you give what you can, unles you feel like they did an AMAZING job and want to give a little extra. My RH suggested $375-$600. I was planning to meet them half way, if that day I feel like giving a bit more I will if I can.

mines getting 150 ..and thats it

I am paying that hall enough money they should be paying him better if he needs to collect tips

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Posted by kslmbuggie

$2-$3pp is a good amount. Who said they split with the wait staff? Isnt the wait staff supposed to be paid from the B-S 20% gratuity they add on2 the bill?

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I totally forgot about the 20% gratuity! Where the heck does that go if it doesnt go towards the maitre'd or waitstaff?

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Posted by Songstress

800

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Thats what you gave for everyone?

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Posted by bluekat16

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Posted by kslmbuggie

$2-$3pp is a good amount. Who said they split with the wait staff? Isnt the wait staff supposed to be paid from the B-S 20% gratuity they add on2 the bill?

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FH's niece is waitstaff at an RH and she told me they don't see any gratuity..not even the extra 20% we get charged. They only get tips if the people at the table actually tip them. i was soo shocked when she told me this. I thought that the 20% was to cover their tip.

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wow, that is just crazy!!! I still dont understand why we have to tip these people. Dont they get an hourly wage, or some type of salary?

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Posted by kristin597

My RH gave us a 'recommended' amount we should tip the maitre'd. I nearly fell off my chair. Would anyone mind sharing what they tipped or are planning on tipping? I'm just trying to figure out if I'm completely out of touch with 'tipping norms'. Thanks in advance ladies.

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i think i can guess about how much they suggested, i remember what JT told me as they suggested tip. It definitely is more than the norm of $3 per person.

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Posted by wifetobe

Now Im confused!! Do we tip the Banquet Manager too?????

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Well from what i was told is that the maitre'd splits the tip with the BM. When they made the suggestion of a tip to me regarding the maitre'd, she also explained that the whole tip doesnt go just to the maitre'd but he will split a percentage of it with the bm whom you worked with.