Pre-Matrimonial Interview (Catholic)

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Posted by jbean36251

I too am getting married in a Catholic Church.
Did you guys have to fill out a Pre nuptial investigation form by the Diocese of RC?
It asked if you had ever been to professional counseling. I asked what if you had. The Deacon said they may ask you to sign a release form so they could talk to your doctor. i think this is a little intrusive. I don' think they have the right to do that. i understand they want you to be able to enter the marriage freely sand maube want to make sure you can make a decision on uour own. Do they really need to dig into your life that much. I was raised Catholic and really want to get married in the catholic church but that question really made me think twice.

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this question is NOT at all meant to be intrusive. it is asked to actually HELP you or your spouse. if you or your spouse suffers from mental health issues, they want to be able to refer you to someone to help you if needed. also, many people that may struggle with mental illness are not ready emotionally or mentally to enter a marriage. many marriages end because of the stress that comes from a serious mental illness. they want to help you with that and help prevent a marriage that may end in divroce, or to help you through it.

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Posted by PegaLega

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Posted by SoinLoveRwe2

You mentioned St. Pats- I don't know if it's the same one (we're getting married at St. Pats in Bay Shore)

We DEFINATLEY got the third degree!!! FH is Catholic and I am not and we live togther and Fr. Tom kept calling me a 'non- catholic co-habitor!!!'

LOL!! Then they passed over an entire bookelt of all the rules during the ceremony-- I was SHOCKED at all of the things that we're NOT allowed to have!!! Can't have a runner, no petals, rice, birdseed! There are such EXPLICIT instructions on photo and video- there's even a map of where the photog and videog can stand in the church and it says that they can take 'one picture of each member of the BP on their way down the aisle.'

If we want our own musicians we have to pay a per hour rate for mandatory practice in church and they have the right to refuse our musicians and every song that we choose must be approved by the director of the music department....


Just to name a few!!! SOOOO many rules to follow!!!

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They do this b/c to the church its a sacrament and should be treated as such. As brides of course we want pictures but they want you to remember why you are really there not the flash or the video guy to take away from taht.

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I agree that the church should be a sacred place and we should not let the festivities of the wedding overshadow the fact that this is a religious celebration-- an I understand why there are rules but it just seems like they are TRYING to make your life difficult!

I dont think that they should allow the photog to stand on the alter--- but I also think that they act as if taking pictures overshadows the ceremony-- all I want to do is create memories of something that is so important to us!!

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Posted by MD835

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Posted by SoinLoveRwe2

You mentioned St. Pats- I don't know if it's the same one (we're getting married at St. Pats in Bay Shore)

We DEFINATLEY got the third degree!!! FH is Catholic and I am not and we live togther and Fr. Tom kept calling me a 'non- catholic co-habitor!!!'

LOL!! Then they passed over an entire bookelt of all the rules during the ceremony-- I was SHOCKED at all of the things that we're NOT allowed to have!!! Can't have a runner, no petals, rice, birdseed! There are such EXPLICIT instructions on photo and video- there's even a map of where the photog and videog can stand in the church and it says that they can take 'one picture of each member of the BP on their way down the aisle.'

If we want our own musicians we have to pay a per hour rate for mandatory practice in church and they have the right to refuse our musicians and every song that we choose must be approved by the director of the music department....


Just to name a few!!! SOOOO many rules to follow!!!

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We're getting married at St. Patrick's Cathedral on 5th Ave in NYC and the priests are really intimidating - I met with 2 - the priest who's helping us with the paperwork and the Rector

Yeah they have a LOT of restrictions (no petals,etc) but I guess they can because of prestige -- I really believe there's seriously some sort of corporate heirarchy going on in the church

We can't have our own musicians -- we HAVE to follow all their rules to get married there!!

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Yes they are really strict!! Who is marrying you? We're not being married by a St. Pats preist, Monsignor Jim Vlaun (CEO of telecare) is a family friend and he is performing our marraige ceremony- so it's a little different becuase we deal with Fr. Tom now and Msgr Jim later.

One thing i LOVE about St. Pats (besides how beautiful it is...) FOCUS!! FH and I loved it and we had a TOTAL blast!! We thought it was a great communication tool and it was so awesome to see how well we know eachother!

I was raised Catholic and have all the necessary sacraments up to marriage but I now attend a protestant church. My FH and I will be married in his Protestant church and we are required to complete what they call marriage counseling which is like the interview.
I wonder what the differences will be.