PSA for brides

Original post by wp2006

May 23, 2006 12:29 PM

Public Service Announcement for brides from a wedding party member:

Paying for your 'maids hair & make up is NOT a gift to them. it is a gift to YOU. it puts them out and benefits only you, therefore doo not refer to it as a gift to them, it will only annoy them.

If your wedding is at 4:00 pm, your wedding party is not obligated to be anywhere, etc before 2:00 pm earliest. Anything earlier you need to say please & thank you and be grateful for inconveniencing them.

Splitting up couples is rude. Splitting up married couples is hateful. In order to properly belss your own marriege, you should bless hte concept of marriage. karma will come back & bite you.

If fyou want to do a bouqet toss/garder toss fine. but if you call out your friends after they discreetly & politely decline, you are not a good friend. Hunilation is NOT a bridesmaid requirement! (and yes, many people find it humilating, just cause you don't doesn't mean you get to choose their values)

If you gave a crappy cheap gift to your friends last year, don't complain if you get the same $$ amount back. it doesn't matter that your wedding cost more - daa if you can afford more you NEED less.

MrsWmson2be Posted: May 23, 2006 01:40 PM

Re: PSA for brides

I was really relaxed with my bridesmaids. I didn't require any of them to have their hair & makeup done, or dye their shoes or wear certain jewelry. I say that if you dealt with it this long, just go through with it.

It's a shame that the bride is this inconsiderate, but I guess she has a severe case of tunnel vision. I can only imagine that she'll get worse as the next 2 weeks progress.

Re: transportation: can you and the other people in your situation arrange for a car service to drive you and split the cost?

SeptBride70 Posted: May 23, 2006 01:40 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by BellaEyes

Posted by JennandPhil827

Posted by itslaurie.

Posted by RadioLau

I guess I just don't understand why complaining on LIW is helping anything.

couldn't this same sentiment be applied towards a large percentage of the posts on this entire website?

Well in this case something someone else did is being directed at us instead of the right person(her friend) which makes it annoying.

WELL SAID!!

exactly!! i agree and i agree also with what bellaeyes originally posted.

Summer101 Posted: May 23, 2006 01:40 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by klingklang77

Posted by JennandPhil827

Posted by itslaurie.

Posted by RadioLau

I guess I just don't understand why complaining on LIW is helping anything.

couldn't this same sentiment be applied towards a large percentage of the posts on this entire website?

Well in this case something someone else did is being directed at us instead of the right person(her friend) which makes it annoying.

i dont think she is directing it at us. she is just venting, god knows why she is doing it here, perhaps the bride is on this site and she secretly hopes she find out. just ignore it.

and as someone said she does make valid points, but the delivery is wrong. if you agree with the basic idea of what she is saying, then try to NOT be like the bride she is complaining about.

Actually it is telling brides whatto do and what not to do, so IMO it is directed at us

SeptBride70 Posted: May 23, 2006 01:41 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by BellaEyes

QUICK EVERYONE start analizing if it's YOU!!!

KandR419 Posted: May 23, 2006 01:42 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by ChrissynRicky

Posted by wp2006

oh and I wasn't asked to be a bridesmaid. i was told I would be (with a not imagined implication that if I declined, we would no longer be friends).

If that was me, and a friend DEMANDED such a 'task' from me, I'd reconsider the friendship, and yes, I would lose that person as a friend.

I agree

SeptBride70 Posted: May 23, 2006 01:43 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by JennandPhil827

Posted by klingklang77

Posted by JennandPhil827

Posted by itslaurie.

Posted by RadioLau

I guess I just don't understand why complaining on LIW is helping anything.

couldn't this same sentiment be applied towards a large percentage of the posts on this entire website?

Well in this case something someone else did is being directed at us instead of the right person(her friend) which makes it annoying.

i dont think she is directing it at us. she is just venting, god knows why she is doing it here, perhaps the bride is on this site and she secretly hopes she find out. just ignore it.

and as someone said she does make valid points, but the delivery is wrong. if you agree with the basic idea of what she is saying, then try to NOT be like the bride she is complaining about.

Actually it is telling brides whatto do and what not to do, so IMO it is directed at us

right, exactly-- the name of the post is 'public service announcement for brides' and it's basically saying what we should and should not do-- i mean, it's just not being said in a polite manner at all.

Summer101 Posted: May 23, 2006 01:43 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by STBMrsDaniRella

Posted by neener1211

It is funny how your 'friend' is being so inconsiderate, and now you feel the need to be just as inconsiderate to a bunch of happy brides that don't even know you.

Do something about the problem, don't wallow in it.

totally agree. you are an adult, take care of it yourself. if you were an active member on here i could see being upset about it and needing the time to vent-- but some of the statements are not being said about whoever this bride is personally but more as general statements and it could hurt the feelings (and probably is) of other brides on here and that's not right.
take it up with your 'friend' and if she is that bad get rid of her as a friend!! we are all women and i'm SURE we have all had a $hitty friend along the way in our lives-- nip it in the bud and get her out of your life, JMO.

Exactly! If you gave advice and were on here for good reasons too and not just have a few posts and then start saying what brides should and shouldnt do - I think that is rude

RachelisEngaged Posted: May 23, 2006 01:50 PM

Re: PSA for brides

To the original poster: I think that it's fine to vent about something wedding related on here, and I dont think you''re rude at all. Maybe someone here would benefit from your story.

And, while I think you should address this with your friend, I can see how it could be difficult to get through to her because brides are crazy sometimes!!!! Just go with the flow and dont stress it, at least you're getting your hair done and are going to look great for the day

smara Posted: May 23, 2006 01:56 PM

Re: PSA for brides

I dont get the splitting up couples thing-- some one please explain?

Also wanted to add that I must be old school because if I am in a wedding I expect the bride to tell me what dress, shoes, hair, place and time. And if there is something so far fetched than I dont do it or inquire about it. Is the bride going to put a gun to you or eat you alive, they are just people who are stressed like anyone partaking an important event in there life....- All my BM asked me are there specific shoes, where r we getting out hair done and so forth..

Ex) Me and my sister were in a wedding and we threw the shower for the bride no one in the party wanted to help at all, we also paid for her video. So we were tapped out of money and then last min they wanted to go out for a bacheloer party w/ limo etc.. we just said no and explained to the bride why we couldnt do it.

randella Posted: May 23, 2006 01:56 PM

Re: PSA for brides

I definitely think some brides can be inconsiderate-- I have experienced some of this-- or have heard about it from friends-- but never ever on the level as the original poster-- a small thing here or there. I personally tried to go out of my way to make sure my BMs were not inconvienced and tried to make them being in my wedding party a honor, and not an honor and an inconvenience as well.

I know you are venting-- as many brides on here have done in the past including myself. Try not to make yourself too crazy-- you are still a part of this wedding, and despite the money, it's one weekend that will be over in two weeks. Try to still be happy for your friend- even if you feel she is being unreasonable-- and yes. the last two weeks before the wedding are incredibly stressful- so, if you can hold it in, than you should if that is something you are willing to do.

Boston&NY2006 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:11 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by wp2006

So you all, as brides, really think that I shoudl approach the bride, NOW inteh 11th hour (wedding in less than 2 weeks) with these concerns?

You think that would be appropriate?
You don't think that would maybe be stress she doesn't need right now?

These were [mostly] not issues back a few months out when I could have gracefully declined. if I back out now, she needs to reconfigure her procession, her seating, her everything.

So I decided to vent ina nuetral place while also letting brides in on how actions appear to others.

it;s JUST a wedding.

And while maybe htis experience is showing I shouldn't be friends with her in general, i somehow thing now, during her stressing, is not the appropriate or mature time to break off being friends.

Interesting that you're being so considerate of your 'friend' now because she's stressed, but chose to unleash on brides you don't even know about 'how actions appear to others.' Newsflash, sweetie: The majority of brides don't behave like your so-called friend is behaving, so it's rude to post a 'Public Service Announcement' airing your list of grievances with her, but direct it at other brides.

I'm truly sorry that you have to deal with a bridezilla, but you're sorely mistaken if you think that this is how all brides behave. (and as a sidenote, we do know that it's 'just a wedding' as you keep saying....it just makes you sound a little bitter and jealous to keep saying it.)

wp2006 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:12 PM

Re: PSA for brides

FYI, the bride has actually responded to this thread.

And, well you all can read the posts - she didn't own up to any of this. She knows it's her...

Honestly, sorry to offend some of you, but really now, it is just a party. it's not the end of the world if someone wants to wear their own lipstick. I'm being ofriced to use someone elses mascara for goodness sake - GROSS.

Everyone can take a lesson from this. i apologise in regards to my harsh delivery tho.

smara Posted: May 23, 2006 02:13 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by smara

I dont get the splitting up couples thing-- some one please explain?

Can someone explain this to me - is it because of the limos or at the reception when the BP is sitting with the on the Dais (sp?)

RadioLau Posted: May 23, 2006 02:15 PM

Re: PSA for brides

I was thinking the splitting up part is walking down the aisle ??? Just a guess.

FallBride05 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:15 PM

Re: PSA for brides

to the original poster. Looking at your profile I see you are already married. Did you think your wedding was 'just a wedding' or 'just a part' probably not. Perhaps you forgot what wedding planning was like.

SeptBride70 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:15 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by smara

Posted by smara

I dont get the splitting up couples thing-- some one please explain?

Can someone explain this to me - is it because of the limos or at the reception when the BP is sitting with the on the Dais (sp?)

well, we are splitting from our BP-- me and FH will be in a classic limo and they will be in a mercedes-- i mean, i know everyone does it differently but that's what we will be doing. JMO

smara Posted: May 23, 2006 02:15 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by wp2006
Honestly, sorry to offend some of you, but really now, it is just a party.

Call my wedding a party again and see what happens Remember the Friends episode when Monica said this to Joey --- it was when he realized he had to work and he had to be an officiant. Sorry im a Freinds - A - Holic

CLMon7906 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:16 PM

Re: PSA for brides

wait, we have to sit with the groom????? since when did this tradition begin???

lilqtpie2181 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:16 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by tonimike

Um someone is mad at someone huh ?

Looks that way!!!

Summer101 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:16 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by smara

Posted by smara

I dont get the splitting up couples thing-- some one please explain?

Can someone explain this to me - is it because of the limos or at the reception when the BP is sitting with the on the Dais (sp?)

It is at the reception- that people in the bridal party is seated separately from their dates. I am personally not doing that and some points were valid but it was all in the delivery which wasnt presented nicely