PSA for brides

Original post by wp2006

May 23, 2006 12:29 PM

Public Service Announcement for brides from a wedding party member:

Paying for your 'maids hair & make up is NOT a gift to them. it is a gift to YOU. it puts them out and benefits only you, therefore doo not refer to it as a gift to them, it will only annoy them.

If your wedding is at 4:00 pm, your wedding party is not obligated to be anywhere, etc before 2:00 pm earliest. Anything earlier you need to say please & thank you and be grateful for inconveniencing them.

Splitting up couples is rude. Splitting up married couples is hateful. In order to properly belss your own marriege, you should bless hte concept of marriage. karma will come back & bite you.

If fyou want to do a bouqet toss/garder toss fine. but if you call out your friends after they discreetly & politely decline, you are not a good friend. Hunilation is NOT a bridesmaid requirement! (and yes, many people find it humilating, just cause you don't doesn't mean you get to choose their values)

If you gave a crappy cheap gift to your friends last year, don't complain if you get the same $$ amount back. it doesn't matter that your wedding cost more - daa if you can afford more you NEED less.

smara Posted: May 23, 2006 02:17 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by STBMrsDaniRella

Posted by smara

Posted by smara

I dont get the splitting up couples thing-- some one please explain?

Can someone explain this to me - is it because of the limos or at the reception when the BP is sitting with the on the Dais (sp?)

well, we are splitting from our BP-- me and FH will be in a classic limo and they will be in a mercedes-- i mean, i know everyone does it differently but that's what we will be doing. JMO

yeah so are we... I thought she meant that she had to be in a limo an therefore away from her hubby

Summer101 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:18 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by FallBride05

to the original poster. Looking at your profile I see you are already married. Did you think your wedding was 'just a wedding' or 'just a part' probably not. Perhaps you forgot what wedding planning was like.

Well said!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SunBride07 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:18 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Stop complaining and do something about it - talk to you friend and back out of the wedding party.

Nina Posted: May 23, 2006 02:19 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by RadioLau

I think there are some people out there that need to respectfully decline when asked to be a member of a bridal party. You were a choice and it is your choice to say no.

Bravo

RadioLau Posted: May 23, 2006 02:19 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Or maybe she didn't really have a big wedding and wishes she did.

smara Posted: May 23, 2006 02:19 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by JennandPhil827

It is at the reception- that people in the bridal party is seated separately from their dates. I am personally not doing that and some points were valid but it was all in the delivery which wasnt presented nicely

yeah I am sitting couples together too, but my cousins wedding 10 yrs ago we had to sit at the long table with the couple. I think that style is not used so much anymore.

wp2006 - can you explain how you are getting split up.. its killing me?

SeptBride70 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:21 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by smara

Posted by wp2006
Honestly, sorry to offend some of you, but really now, it is just a party.

Call my wedding a party again and see what happens Remember the Friends episode when Monica said this to Joey --- it was when he realized he had to work and he had to be an officiant. Sorry im a Freinds - A - Holic

SeptBride70 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:22 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by JennandPhil827

Posted by FallBride05

to the original poster. Looking at your profile I see you are already married. Did you think your wedding was 'just a wedding' or 'just a part' probably not. Perhaps you forgot what wedding planning was like.

Well said!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i agree!!!

Soon2BeMrs2006 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:22 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by STBMrsDaniRella

Posted by smara

Posted by wp2006
Honestly, sorry to offend some of you, but really now, it is just a party.

Call my wedding a party again and see what happens Remember the Friends episode when Monica said this to Joey --- it was when he realized he had to work and he had to be an officiant. Sorry im a Freinds - A - Holic

SeptBride70 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:23 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by melissa&carmine

Stop complaining and do something about it - talk to you friend and back out of the wedding party.

LOL talk about getting right to the point!!

i love it!!!

wp2006 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:23 PM

Re: PSA for brides

yes my wedding was just a party. Was it big? yes (in terms of my life)
Was it expensive? sure
did it stress me? yup

But my focus was on creating an atmosphere of joy & love and fun. it was about a CELEBRATION, in other words, yes it was just a party.
This wedding is about photos and impressions and showing up others.

As for splitting up couples, I mean married couples - both in WP, walking with others down the aisle because one is best man but his wife is 'only' a BM. And splitting up [married & engaged] couples so they sit at different tables and have to take photos with, and [have to] dance with their match up instead of their spouse [or date].

SeptBride70 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:23 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by smara

Posted by JennandPhil827

It is at the reception- that people in the bridal party is seated separately from their dates. I am personally not doing that and some points were valid but it was all in the delivery which wasnt presented nicely

yeah I am sitting couples together too, but my cousins wedding 10 yrs ago we had to sit at the long table with the couple. I think that style is not used so much anymore.

wp2006 - can you explain how you are getting split up.. its killing me?

you are so funny smara!!! it's killing me too tho lol

Summer101 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:24 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by smara

Posted by JennandPhil827

It is at the reception- that people in the bridal party is seated separately from their dates. I am personally not doing that and some points were valid but it was all in the delivery which wasnt presented nicely

yeah I am sitting couples together too, but my cousins wedding 10 yrs ago we had to sit at the long table with the couple. I think that style is not used so much anymore.

wp2006 - can you explain how you are getting split up.. its killing me?

Yes true it isnt done that much anymore

SeptBride70 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:26 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by wp2006

As for splitting up couples, I mean married couples - both in WP, walking with others down the aisle because one is best man but his wife is 'only' a BM. And splitting up [married & engaged] couples so they sit at different tables and have to take photos with, and [have to] dance with their match up instead of their spouse [or date].

this august my sister is getting married and her FH's best man is his brother. i am my sister's MOH and my FH was asked to be in the wedding party (which we are thrilled about and were very honored that they asked us). my FH will be walking with my sister's girlfriend Kathleen-- i have NO problem with this, i was happy that my FH was asked to be in the party at all-- i'm certainly not going to start telling my FBIL to BUMP his brother so that I can walk down an aisle for 20 seconds with my FH... to be upset about that is ludicrous, JMHO

ETA: and if my sister chose to have a couples dance then FH would dance with Kathleen too and i would happily dance with FBIL's brother-- i mean, give me a break.

CLMon7906 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:28 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by wp2006

As for splitting up couples, I mean married couples - both in WP, walking with others down the aisle because one is best man but his wife is 'only' a BM. And splitting up [married & engaged] couples so they sit at different tables and have to take photos with, and [have to] dance with their match up instead of their spouse [or date].

UM....let's say for a moment that my MOH and her husband are to be in our wedding party....her husband is a dear friend to us, but by far, NOT the man FH wants up there as his 'best man'....should i then demote my MOH (and my dearest friend) or insist that he make the husband is best man so that they don't walk with other people?? that is dumb.

as for tables that is wrong...i can see her wanting some cute photos of the WP dancing together...with their walk-in 'partners' it doesn't mean you can't dance with your real date the rest of the day/night.

Summer101 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:28 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by wp2006

yes my wedding was just a party. Was it big? yes (in terms of my life)
Was it expensive? sure
did it stress me? yup

But my focus was on creating an atmosphere of joy & love and fun. it was about a CELEBRATION, in other words, yes it was just a party.
This wedding is about photos and impressions and showing up others.

As for splitting up couples, I mean married couples - both in WP, walking with others down the aisle because one is best man but his wife is 'only' a BM. And splitting up [married & engaged] couples so they sit at different tables and have to take photos with, and [have to] dance with their match up instead of their spouse [or date].

Would it kill you to walk down the aisle with someone else? Is it that terrible?? I think you should have just said no to the BM thing. I dont think you know how to do something for someone elses day- certain things are unreasonable to ask of a bridal party member but to walk down an aisle with someone else is not.

Summer101 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:29 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by STBMrsDaniRella

Posted by wp2006

As for splitting up couples, I mean married couples - both in WP, walking with others down the aisle because one is best man but his wife is 'only' a BM. And splitting up [married & engaged] couples so they sit at different tables and have to take photos with, and [have to] dance with their match up instead of their spouse [or date].

this august my sister is getting married and her FH's best man is his brother. i am my sister's MOH and my FH was asked to be in the wedding party (which we are thrilled about and were very honored that they asked us). my FH will be walking with my sister's girlfriend Kathleen-- i have NO problem with this, i was happy that my FH was asked to be in the party at all-- i'm certainly not going to start telling my FBIL to BUMP his brother so that I can walk down an aisle for 20 seconds with my FH... to be upset about that is ludicrous, JMHO

ETA: and if my sister chose to have a couples dance then FH would dance with Kathleen too and i would happily dance with FBIL's brother-- i mean, give me a break.

I know!! I think I need to walk away from this post!!!!!

SeptBride70 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:30 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by JennandPhil827

Posted by wp2006

yes my wedding was just a party. Was it big? yes (in terms of my life)
Was it expensive? sure
did it stress me? yup

But my focus was on creating an atmosphere of joy & love and fun. it was about a CELEBRATION, in other words, yes it was just a party.
This wedding is about photos and impressions and showing up others.

As for splitting up couples, I mean married couples - both in WP, walking with others down the aisle because one is best man but his wife is 'only' a BM. And splitting up [married & engaged] couples so they sit at different tables and have to take photos with, and [have to] dance with their match up instead of their spouse [or date].

Would it kill you to walk down the aisle with someone else? Is it that terrible?? I think you should have just said no to the BM thing. I dont think you know how to do something for someone elses day- certain things are unreasonable to ask of a bridal party member but to walk down an aisle with someone else is not.

yeah exactly-- you act like she is asking you to perform a sexual act on someone else who is not your FH/DH while walking down the aisle, it's crazy!!!

SeptBride70 Posted: May 23, 2006 02:30 PM

Re: PSA for brides

Posted by JennandPhil827

Posted by STBMrsDaniRella

Posted by wp2006

As for splitting up couples, I mean married couples - both in WP, walking with others down the aisle because one is best man but his wife is 'only' a BM. And splitting up [married & engaged] couples so they sit at different tables and have to take photos with, and [have to] dance with their match up instead of their spouse [or date].

this august my sister is getting married and her FH's best man is his brother. i am my sister's MOH and my FH was asked to be in the wedding party (which we are thrilled about and were very honored that they asked us). my FH will be walking with my sister's girlfriend Kathleen-- i have NO problem with this, i was happy that my FH was asked to be in the party at all-- i'm certainly not going to start telling my FBIL to BUMP his brother so that I can walk down an aisle for 20 seconds with my FH... to be upset about that is ludicrous, JMHO

ETA: and if my sister chose to have a couples dance then FH would dance with Kathleen too and i would happily dance with FBIL's brother-- i mean, give me a break.

I know!! I think I need to walk away from this post!!!!!

LOL me too-- it's like a crazy relative that you don't want at family functions but part of you does just to laugh at LOL

RadioLau Posted: May 23, 2006 02:32 PM

Re: PSA for brides

If my FH's brother should get married I know my FH would be the BM and I wouldn't expect to be walking with him. It would be fine. THere has to be a hierarchy.