RE: The Infidelity thread on the NW board

LOL, Karen! May be he is, eh?

That is a very valid point and Shamma already mentioned it in her post! Why would you stay a partnership like that? Shamma said that her and her man have an agreement: instead of cheeting, just be honest and leave. And while it's really quite a sad topic for discussion, it's an honest, srtraightforward outlook! Nothing is worse than finding out your partner was making a fool out of you for months and months!

RE: The Infidelity thread on the NW board

I think that referring to someone as being deformed due to a weight gain is a little extreme. Some people gain weight as they get older because their metabolism changes or because of some other medical reason.

There are many people who BATTLE with their weight. It isn't necessarily because they 'let themselves go' and refuse to turn things around. For example, some women gain a lot of weight while pregnant and no amount of dieting and exercise gets them back to their pre-pregnancy weight.

I wouldn't seriously entertain the thought of leaving or cheating on my husband based solely on the fact that he gained weight. I would not have married him if I expected him to stay the same forever, because no one does. I think we will both gain weight as we get older and change in many non-physical ways. I can deal with them because that is what I signed on for.

RE: The Infidelity thread on the NW board

Becky You said it!!

Weight loss is tough a lot of times. It's not just 'go on a diet and get on the treadmill'... sure that works for a lot of people, but it's easier said than done.

RE: The Infidelity thread on the NW board

I think the issue is more then just weight gain, ladies! I thnk it about physical appearance in general, keeping yourself attracive!

Very few lucky woman stay in exactly the same shape ater babies as they were before! Ogf cource, there is some weight gain and generally changes in your figure, but it doesn't mean lettign your self go!

I look at my mother and of course she gainded weight compair to their wedding pictures, but she takes care of herself, always dresses well, gets her hair and nails done, and doesn't let go of her body! She cares, doesn't eat bread at night, signed up at the swimming pool and made my Dad do the same! So, now they take care of their well being together!

ok, it's official, I really can't spell at all

RE: The Infidelity thread on the NW board

Anya, the spell checker is coming they say

People part all the time, we never know what will happen, like I said before we are only guaranteed today. NO one knows what or how us or our hubby is going to feel 10, 15 yrs down the line. They can leave and you are still hot and sexy. The reality is that things happen. Live the best life you can while you can.

RE: The Infidelity thread on the NW board

I am very disappointed to see a group of adult educated women refer to gaining weight as women letting themselves go.

Come on. I know tons of overweight people that are attractive and keep themselves together more than slim women. They are educated and can keep a man.

I am sorry but if my husband came to me and said he would leave if I gained weight the first thing I would do is question our marriage.

RE: The Infidelity thread on the NW board

I think I must be missing something..... if it's that easy to lose weight and stay thin, don't you think there would be less overweight people?

After reading some of this, you would think people who are overweight choose and want to be that way. There are so many factors involved in weight gain and weight loss.
I don't understand putting conditions on a marriage regarding weight at all. Marriage is a lifetime committment, period.

RE: The Infidelity thread on the NW board

I totally agree! The weight issue was brought up in the NW thread., and got me to thinking.

Believe me, neither my FH or myself are small by any means, but we both take care of ourselves and dress nice. The weight issue really bothered me because I do not bleieve that someone would end a marriage over it. Yes, I can understand that you may be less attracted, but divorce is a harsh decision!

RE: The Infidelity thread on the NW board

I would never leave him.

RE: The Infidelity thread on the NW board

I would never leave him either. He gained like 60 pounds. As well as myself gaining. I love him.IMO someone who would cheat or leave someone cause they put on some pounds doesnt really love themselves their mate. And probably shouldnt be married anyway!

The comments about the overweight woman letting themselves go. Or Overweight people not taking care of themselves really upset me. I am overweight. All the woman in my family are overweight. I try to take it off. ITS HARD. People who are like a size 2 might not realize this. Dont u think 'fat' peope want to be skinny. Dont u think I want to go into a regular store and buy something of the rack in 5 minutes.Don't u think I dont like going into the store like lane bryant. I get my nails done I wear make up. I get my hair done. I shower everyday. Im just like skinny people minus the skinny.

RE: The Infidelity thread on the NW board

i also think that when you say overweight people are 'letting themselves go' or are 'unattractive' you're playing into the stigma that society has created that being attractive is being thin.

yes, being grossly overweight can be a health concern, and that is when it needs to be taken care of becuse it will affect other people.

but there are some people who are not their ideal weight and yet, they are still healthy!

something to think about....i have a friend who weighs between 100-110. recently, when she was at the doctor, she was told that her blood pressure is the same as a 300 pound woman on the verge of a heart attack. she is considered attractive by today's standards because of her weight, yet she is no where near healthy.

beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

and i would never leave or cheat because my husband gained weight....if it started the threaten his health i would support him and try to help him get healthier! isn't that what love is?