My fiance and I have only been engaged for one week and people have already been saying mean things to us about our engagement. Is this normal?
Apparently my fiance's cousin said that I must be a superficial b*tch who is only marrying him for his money because my engagement ring is on the larger side.
My best friend who I thought would be so happy for me and who I was going to ask to be my MOH has been avoiding me since our engagement.
FH's older sister told us we're way too young to be getting married.
Lastly, we haven't set a date yet and we're already getting snide comments about it. We are hoping to get married on the first of a month (since we started dating on the first of a month and were engaged on the first of a month) and we were told this is 'stupid' by multiple people. We're also hoping to get married in 2008 since we got engaged on New Year's and feel like this is 'our year.' I overheard my brother's girlfriend saying that I'm probably pregnant and using this as an excuse to have a shotgun wedding.
This is supposed to be a joyful time for us and all of these comments are making it hard to be happy. Shouldn't these people be happy for us, especially since they are FAMILY and close friends?
shroney
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
That is awful. I am sorry people are rude. People make insensitive, ignorant remarks all the time. I know it probably hurts but try to be a bigger person than they are and don't let them see it bothers you. Just try to laugh it off.
Soon2BMrsD
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
well thats just RUDE! im sorry to hear that this is how your engagement started!!
1st off CONGRATS! you must be so excited! 2nd... tell everyone else that if they have nothing nice to say to say NOTHING!
i get the 'your way to young to get married, your throwing your life away' all the time luckly its NOT from our family! our families are SUPER supportive since we got engaged 10 days after turning 21! People dont realize that what they say is rude or hurtfull so you need to call them out on it so they know they are stepping out of line! thats one thing ive learned from being engaged for 2 years.
and lastly WHO CARES! i know it hurts your feelings but as long as you and him know your doing whats right.. Screw everyone else Its your life and you know what they say about opinions... 'opinions are like @ssholes, everyone has one and they ALL STINK!' (i've had to use that a few times to people who have had mean things to say!)
Good luck with your planning if you need anything we're all here!!
laura33
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
Jeoulosy is what it is
RKellner
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
Sorry you are going through all of this! Keep your head up and ignore the comments... Yea it may be hard to but they arent worth it.... The only thing that matters is the love between you and your fiance... Everything will come together... You just know people's true colors... Personally, if it were me... I wouldnt keep my mouth shut.. I would tell them exactly what I thought of what they had to say... I would at least confront them... It IS supposed to be a joyous time for you both.... Why let other people put a damper on it... Or get away with rude remarks? Say whats on your mind!!
Kimbalina
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
I am sorry that you are facing this. I know lots of brides on here have faced this, including myself.
Congrats on your engagement and WE are excited for you here!
AndRecKy
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
OHHHH DONT LISTEN TO ANYONE-THEY ARE ALL JEALOUS! eNJOY YOUR ENGAGEMENT!! CONGRATS TO YOU JESSICA!!!
HAPPY PLANNING!!
minibride08
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
I agree w/ everyone - JEALOUSY!!!! Do what makes you happy and don't listen AT ALL to what they say.... If you want to get married this year, on the first, wearing a pink dress, with a blue dog walking you down the isle = than do it!! It's about you and FH - not all the family, in-laws, etc...
I think you should talk to your BFF. You're right, she might feel like she's losing you. And, I'd hold off until you feel 100% that she's there for you and will support you as your MOH.
ENJOY this time & good luck!
Luvbsb4eva
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
First I want to say congratulations on your engagement! You must be so excited! And I am so sorry that people are doing this to you! You never know how those around you are going to react... But as long as the both of you love each other and are happy that's all you need to know!
I also wanted to add that you're not the only one who wants to do the date thing because of a certain reason... I wanted to have our wedding date be 8/8/08 because we had our first date on 4/4/04! People usually say it's cute to my face, who knows if they really think it's stupid, I don't care though, I love it!
Miblove
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
LOOK WHAT I FOUND ON THEKNOT!
So appropriate for this discussion
I won't let downers dampen my enthusiasm. As you've no doubt already noticed, there are people out there who seem determined to make you feel bad about your wedding planning excitement. Maybe they're single and jealous, or not-so-happily married and bitter, or just the types who can't bear to witness other people's joy without trying to chip away at it. It can be hard to ID these people because their negativity is often backhanded and disguised as advice ('Don't stress about the details so much -- it's just a party that will be over in five hours!'), or because they might ask you lots of questions about your wedding day details only to teasingly call you 'Bridezilla' when you answer. But once you've noticed that discussing your plans with certain people leaves you feeling defensive or deflated, cross them off your list of conversation partners. You have plenty of others in your life who are genuinely excited for you and eager to hear about (almost) every aspect of the planning process.
he gives me butterflies
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
Posted by JessicaLuvsDanny
My fiance and I have only been engaged for one week and people have already been saying mean things to us about our engagement. Is this normal?
Apparently my fiance's cousin said that I must be a superficial b*tch who is only marrying him for his money because my engagement ring is on the larger side.
My best friend who I thought would be so happy for me and who I was going to ask to be my MOH has been avoiding me since our engagement.
FH's older sister told us we're way too young to be getting married.
Lastly, we haven't set a date yet and we're already getting snide comments about it. We are hoping to get married on the first of a month (since we started dating on the first of a month and were engaged on the first of a month) and we were told this is 'stupid' by multiple people. We're also hoping to get married in 2008 since we got engaged on New Year's and feel like this is 'our year.' I overheard my brother's girlfriend saying that I'm probably pregnant and using this as an excuse to have a shotgun wedding.
This is supposed to be a joyful time for us and all of these comments are making it hard to be happy. Shouldn't these people be happy for us, especially since they are FAMILY and close friends?
people are mean, rude and JEALOUS!!! btw your ring is gorgeous! and everyone should be happy for you, at first a lot of our freinds were jealous, and unfortunately some still are, but they'll come around. and if not, keep your head up and let your ring sparkle b/c your ENGAGED!!!!!!!
Crystan08
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
I really am sorry that people can be so rude especially at such a happy point in your life!!! Try not to listen to other people and remember why the two of you got engaged in the first place. I am young as well so i def have heard a few comments about my age but don't let anyone get in the way of your happy time planning. I have a few friends who i thought would be more excited about our engagement as well but i think it's a combination of a few things but also the fact that some of my friends aren't even thinking about getting married yet. So although it may seem as if some friends are not as happy for you it could be that they just aren't in that boat yet you know? One thing to remember....you are never going to get this time back so try to enjoy your planning with your FH and the people who are truly happy for you!!!! Good Luck!!!!!!
Julybride08
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
Don't listen to anyone. they are all just jealous of you and your FH. Don't worry about it.
LnF0405
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
Unfurtunaly that is how people are.... 2 week before we got engaged My FSIL said that I was manipulating his brother to do what I want with the wedding and that was only ******** that he agree with me her exact words where 'that is bulls*** he only agree to have a small wedding to make YOU happy' his cousin went to his house scream as why we are doing this and that (2 weeks before getting engaged) . A lot of people thought that I was too young (and in back they where saying that I was probably pregnat). Someone else said that why he proposed with such a small ring.. Someone else told me that a person who waits more than a year after getting engaged to get married is that they dont want to get married. My BF and MOH everytime I send a email to know ask her when she can come or how are we going to measure for her dress she dont return my email (she live in another country but she travel ALOT so I know she have the money to come I just want to know when so I can put my vacation that way I can spend time with her),... All this and I am still 1 year and 3 months to the wedding... You have to be focus and only care about what you and FH want.
mariaobride
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Re: Snide remarks about your engagement?
Posted by Soon2beAlberti
you know what...I always said if you wanna know who your true friends are (especially female ones) ...get engaged. Some of the people whom I thought would never be jealous of me during the happiest time of my life...were the first ones to show their true colors. I had my best friend get married (she planned the wedding in less than 2 months and did JOP wedding)and not tell me til 1 week before the wedding...i wasn't invited but WAS invited to bridal shower with only one week notice via phone call.
another friend started snatching magazines from me and ripping out pages for her wedding when she wasn't even engaged...she bugged her man to get her the ring and now they are getting married in a few months (before me). its like all of a sudden girls were on a mad dash to get married and pregnant before I 'beat them to the punch' and it was really sad to see because all I wanted to do was marry my soul mate...WHO I'VE BEEN WITH FOR 7 PLUS YEARS!!! these girls had been with there men for less than 1 yr and 3 yrs.
people get stupid, but don't let it get to you. focus on the love you have for your fiance because thats what the marriage will be about. no matter what happens in this world, you and your future husband will be there for each other and that is deff something to celebrate. so forget about what these people are saying and doing and just enjoy this time with your partner...and enjoy every second because it goes quick. don't let them put a damper on it.
i am so with you on that one- very well put i couldnt agree enough
