Someone made me cry today...

I was manning a table at a walk today, and I was eating a bagel with soy cream cheese - I only eat bagels on the weekend - my little treat...

Anyway, it's a big bagel, and I was taking a bite, and this older woman I have known for a few years laughs and says to me, 'I thought brides are supposed to be very thin!'

I couldn't even answer... Later on I gave FH the other half of my bagel, and he asked me why... I couldn't even answer him...

Then he said - is it because of what Pat said? I didn't even think he heard...

I went to the bathroom and cried....

Am I over reacting? I have worked really hard on losing the 30 pounds I gained a few years ago when I was depressed, and I finally was happy with the way I looked - I cried later to FH because it made me feel like I wasn't going to be a beautiful bride because I am not 'very' thin - I mean, I am between a size 4-6 - I am not heavy anymore... He told me that i will be a very beautiful bride, and people compliment me all the time - but soemtimes it seems like no matter what 100 people say, what 1 person stupidly says can really hurt, you know?


Sorry - I just need some encouragement and nice words....

Oh my gosh! That has got to be the rudest thing I have ever heard!! I think you look great!!! Dont let what she said get you down. Im sure shes an old fart anyway!

You are not 'big' at all. Did she mean you had to be a 'bag of bone'?

Don't worry about it!!!

---

Posted by sr081906

You are not 'big' at all. Did she mean you had to be a 'bag of bone'?

Don't worry about it!!!

---

i don't know what she meant!

My FH said that I am a fat girl inside a skinny body, so things like that always seem to get to me....

I agree with him...

F*ck her!!!!

I would kill to be a size 4-6! If she was right, I wouldnt be a bride, because compared to you I am a whale!

Dont let people like that get to you, she is apparently miserable, and you know what they say about misery

---

Posted by princessofci

F*ck her!!!!

I would kill to be a size 4-6! If she was right, I wouldnt be a bride, because compared to you I am a whale!

Dont let people like that get to you, she is apparently miserable, and you know what they say about misery

---

Thank you!

You are NOT a whale!!!

I think she meant to be funny - she really is a nice person, and an older woman, and she probably thought I could take it because people really have no idea about my body issues - and when I tell people I used to be heavy, they say really? They think I am a very confident woman - and I am - but my achilles heel is to insinuate in some way that I am heavy - and thats it.... I crumble....

are you kidding? That's a pretty rude thing to say.

I hate that people think that just because you are getting married you should suddenly be going on a starvation diet and be obsessed with shrinking down a size 0.

A size 4-6 is TINY. I'm a size 10-ish, and I don't consider myself to be heavy (I'm 5'10, so I'm just proportionate), I can't imagine a size 4-6 being called fat!

---

Posted by weddingbunny

are you kidding? That's a pretty rude thing to say.

I hate that people think that just because you are getting married you should suddenly be going on a starvation diet and be obsessed with shrinking down a size 0.

A size 4-6 is TINY. I'm a size 10-ish, and I don't consider myself to be heavy (I'm 5'10, so I'm just proportionate), I can't imagine a size 4-6 being called fat!

---

Thanks - I usually have people telling me I am thin, but I personally don't see it because I'm messed up in the head (I was overweight for most of my life) - so whenever I am complimented - thats what rolls off my back, rather than the other comments, like the one she said, that sticks...

I am working on that - I am 32 and a bright woman and know where its coming from - I get more frustrated sometimes with myself for not getting over it...

People say the stupidest things. I think its great that you treat yourself to a bagel on the weekend. It encourages you to be good during the week to know you have something special on the weekend.

It does stink that you remember what the one person said and not the other 100.

Between a 4 and 6 is tiny! Don't let her ruin your success. (I know - easier said than done).

Yuck. Some people are just so rude, it's unbelievable.

---

Posted by Tria1110

People say the stupidest things. I think its great that you treat yourself to a bagel on the weekend. It encourages you to be good during the week to know you have something special on the weekend.

It does stink that you remember what the one person said and not the other 100.

Between a 4 and 6 is tiny! Don't let her ruin your success. (I know - easier said than done).

---

Thank you!!!!

---

Posted by stephanielyse

Oh, F that stupid lady in the A$$, Liza.
You're going to be a gorgeous bride!

---

In the A$$, huh? Thats a little severe, don't you think???



I love you Stephanie - a fellow vegan, an Ani fan AND a woman who knows the right thing to say for every situation!!! Ever think of working for Hallmark?

Liza you are amazingly beautiful! Dont take what she said to heart - although I could see how hard that was for you. Sometimes people dont even realize what they said. You will be the most beautiful bride - your the cutest

---

Posted by ZuzusPetals

Liza you are amazingly beautiful! Dont take what she said to heart - although I could see how hard that was for you. Sometimes people dont even realize what they said. You will be the most beautiful bride - your the cutest

---

AMAZINGLY beautiful? Wow - thats a good one... I'll try and let that one stick!!!

---

Posted by stephanielyse

---

Posted by lipglossjunky73

---

Posted by stephanielyse

Oh, F that stupid lady in the A$$, Liza.
You're going to be a gorgeous bride!

---

In the A$$, huh? Thats a little severe, don't you think???



I love you Stephanie - a fellow vegan, an Ani fan AND a woman who knows the right thing to say for every situation!!! Ever think of working for Hallmark?

---

Hallmark is working on an 'F him/her in the A$$' line of cards right now. We're just finalizing the graphics.

---

it is a rude thing to say. sometimes people just dont realise what they are saying and how women can be about their bodies.

i had a rude comment from my boss a few weeks ago, when i was eating something. i ate something fried and he is like 'watch what you eat, you have a wedding dress to fit into'. i was like w t f did you just say? mind you i am a size 2-4. a few weeks later he had a BIG pimple on his face and i pointed that right out. revenge is sweet!

Before my wedding, I also lost about 30 pounds....and people would say the rudest things to me....thinking they were complimenting me.
Examples: 'Oh, I didn't recognize you...I don't' think I've ever seen you skinny'
and
'Wow, you don't look as fat as you do in that picture'
I think that sometimes people feel more comfortable commenting on people's weight when they're thin...as obnoxious as the comments might be...

So, if you think about it that way....it could have been a compliment from her because she thought you were thin enough that she could comment on your weight.....