Stressful Hall Decision!!!!!

i think 50k is a realistic budget and a good idea of what you are going to spend.....there are cheaper RHs and vendors and there are more expensive RHs and vendors but i think 50k is a safe bet......

i see why a saturday is best for you (considering all your OOT guests).....unless you do some kind of holiday weekend you are kind of stuck on a saturday....

i think you should keep looking around - you never know what you might find.....you may end up liking something better - the chance of that happening is probably slim but you never know until you look.....i wanted our reception in a certain room at a certain place (its how i imagined it) so i totally understand why you want what you want for your wedding......we had to make it work for us - which meant off season and a friday - but we are making it happen - where there is a will, there is a way

We had the same 'out of towners' problem as well and we went with a Sunday wedding where a holiday falls on the next day (labor day weekend). Although we are paying a bit more then Sunday prices, we're not paying Saturday evening prices at our hall which would have been the same price you are looking at.
Yes there was one other place in the running that had a VERY similar setup to the hall we picked (and was $40 per person cheaper), but it was a two weddings at a time place. And although initially I didn't think that would be a problem when I went to see the hall we picked it just highlighted things that might be an issue (like we would have had limited access to the beach for pictures and such with the hall that had 2 wedding at a time).
Ultimately what it comes down to is that it is your decision. You and your FH need to sit down and decide what is right for you. For my FH and I we felt we didn't want to spend several thousand dollars and then look back at our wedding day pictures and think 'we should have went with the other hall.' We're paying for the majority of the wedding ourselves, and when all is said and done (hall, dj, pics, etc) we'll be pretty close to the $50K mark (but we're also having a guest list of over 200 people). We're doing everything we can to save now and once I start working when I graduate (in Dec) we'll have a lot more income to work with. If it comes time for final payment and we're a bit short, we're planning on taking out a loan and then paying it back right after the wedding. (I know that a lot of people say you should go into debt for a wedding, but different things work for different people).

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Posted by LnF0405

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Posted by Future Pepper

wow! It's very difficult to put a price on your 'perfect wedding', I know! But I think you should weigh the options (which you already started to do in your post). IMO, I think it's not worth all the financial hardship to go with dream place. Having a house right after the wedding is the ultimate goal of some brides, from what I've heard! I'd rather have the wedding fully paid for, not owe anything afterwards, AND have a foot in the door of a house that I'm going to OWN! I know this will be a difficult decision, so GL with whatever you choose and welcome!

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I have to agree with Pepper... I would feel much better at the end to have my bills paid (as you are trying to do) my wedding pay off and money for my house (which is great goal) than just have my 'perfect wedding' JMHO

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I agree with these girls too.. you dont want to get yourself more in the hole than you already are, and I understand that you want that perfect place, but realistically you have to weigh out what is more important to you...good luck!

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Posted by Dr Meg

We had the same 'out of towners' problem as well and we went with a Sunday wedding where a holiday falls on the next day (labor day weekend). Although we are paying a bit more then Sunday prices, we're not paying Saturday evening prices at our hall which would have been the same price you are looking at.
Yes there was one other place in the running that had a VERY similar setup to the hall we picked (and was $40 per person cheaper), but it was a two weddings at a time place. And although initially I didn't think that would be a problem when I went to see the hall we picked it just highlighted things that might be an issue (like we would have had limited access to the beach for pictures and such with the hall that had 2 wedding at a time).
Ultimately what it comes down to is that it is your decision. You and your FH need to sit down and decide what is right for you. For my FH and I we felt we didn't want to spend several thousand dollars and then look back at our wedding day pictures and think 'we should have went with the other hall.' We're paying for the majority of the wedding ourselves, and when all is said and done (hall, dj, pics, etc) we'll be pretty close to the $50K mark (but we're also having a guest list of over 200 people). We're doing everything we can to save now and once I start working when I graduate (in Dec) we'll have a lot more income to work with. If it comes time for final payment and we're a bit short, we're planning on taking out a loan and then paying it back right after the wedding. (I know that a lot of people say you should go into debt for a wedding, but different things work for different people).

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I completely agree with the way you feel- if I am spending several tens of thousand of dollars on one day, it better damn well be a place that I am in love with!!!!!! Just out of curiousity, what was your 2nd choice place?

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Posted by JessesGirl
I completely agree with the way you feel- if I am spending several tens of thousand of dollars on one day, it better damn well be a place that I am in love with!!!!!! Just out of curiousity, what was your 2nd choice place?

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The Surf Club in New Rochelle.

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Posted by CNC4eva3402

Well first off I'd try to negotiate..every little bit can help...

If your hall is gorgeous (as is) you may be able to cut other costs, such as flowers ..etc..maybe opt for much simpler CPs to cut some costs..

50k I think is a little off..but it depends what you want and how much work you want to do. If you want a DJ with all the special effects, lighting, photo montages..and a photographer with all the newest features..CPs that are HIGH and full...etc..etc..of course your wedding could add up to 50k quite easily...but if you just want a DJ you can find one for about $900, if you DIY your CPs and B-Ks you can save yourself around $1500...I've become the Queen of Cheap because I don't want to push my wedding back another year...you can find cheaper ways to do almost everything..

If its important to you to get married by next year then write out what is most important...and how much money you'll have in that time..and see if you can alot the money to tha places that are most important and cut corners in places that aren't so important...

I agree with you completlely that you have to find a hall that you are in love with - even if its only for 5 hours - you are still shelling out a lot of money for it..so you should love it...but be reasonable...it certainly isn't worth going into debt over. Wouldn't you rather put that extra 15k towards a home you'll be in EVERY day vs. a room you'll be in for 5hrs?

Have you tried Atlantica, Surf Club. Louis XVI, Trumpets At The Gate or Cresent Beach Club? They are all a little diff, all beautiful and all on the water!

Good luck and let us know what you deceide!

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Thanks for the places you suggested- they are all amazing and many of them I have already looked in to, but the pricing was high. I am also going to take your advice and maybe cut costs on the details that aren't as important...( ie. flowers, videographer, etc.) I would love to have 15,000 for a house but in the end, i would be happy patying for the wedding without going into debt and then using the $$$ we receive at the wedding for a deposit on a house. It's not an easy decision either way!

And Future Mulligan- you are 100% right! Where there is a will, there is a way and it may be stressful now, but if you want something bad enough, you can make it happen.

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Posted by JessesGirl

Hi Girls- I have a dilemma.

I got engaged 2 months ago and immediately fell in love with a beautiful expensice waterfront place to get married. They are charging $180/head for a Saturday night wedding while every other place we looked at charges $110-150. (these rates are for a sat. night wedding which we are insistant upon for many reasons). The problem is that all the generic halls and mansions we looked at on Long Island dont compare at all! So many have terrible carpeting, horrible chandeliers or are realllllly tacky. We are still looking but the dream place wants us to book by this weekend. They are even using the 'another bride is interested in your date' tactic! After talking to my parents about budget, I have 3 options:

A) Get married in a year or so at the dream place and have to save $15,000 on our own (very stressful since I am currently trying to pay off some credit card debt!)

B) Get married in a year or so at a mediocre place and have the entire wedding payed for and more $ to buy a house!

C) Get married in 2 years at the dream place and have time to save the $15,000.

I knew that I loved the dream place the minute I walked in but my friends say that its 'just one night' and its not worth the stress it would put on me. Not to mention the risk of not having a nicer house b/c we spent all our $ on the wedding. Any advice would be much appreciated!!!!!!!!

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I would go for the dream place, you don't want to get your photos and look back years from now thinking I wish my wedding would have been at Pier 60. With that said, what about Glen Island Harbor Club in Westchester? I heard it is beautiful and has a water view.
I also agree with you about Sat night weddings.....that was my FIRST priority....I HAD to have a Sat Night (thats just me though and what my friends and family are used to).

I skimmed through most of the other posts but I don't think it's worth going into debt for a wedding. I know you are set on a Sat night, but are you set on a specific weekend? If not, don't let that hall pressure you -- there should be other dates left.

I'd keep looking to see if there is a different hall you wont consider 'mediocre' -- you dont want to regret your decision because even the 'mediocre' hall will still be a lot of money. in the meantime you can tell the hall you love that it seems amazing but it's just out of your budget. tell them you'd love to have a sat night wedding there, but you just cant afford it. see if they can work with you. they should be clamoring for you to book, not the reverse.

I'd really recommend looking for an off-season wedding which will save you costs on your hall and on your other vendors.

In the end it might be worth waiting a little longer to save up for the hall you want -- maybe a year and a half instead of a year, but i understand why you might not want to.

you will need to balance what is important to you and choose something you will be happy with.

good luck with your decision

you definitely have a tough decision on your hands... i agree with the other girls, its one that you and your fh need to make together.

that said, i know what you were going through, because there are soo many halls out there that are crazy expensive! one of the things that helped me make my decision was that you really only enjoy a waterfront wedding during the CH for an evening wedding (once it's dark, no one notices the beautiful view). we decided on a friday night rather than saturday . we are still getting married on the water, and also plan on getting our pictures done on a beach.

good luck with your decision!

My advice is to go with what you want. It comes down to what your willing to sacrifice for your wedding day. The lighthouse at Chelsea Piers was my first choice. There are many factors as why we didn't chose the place. Sometimes I get bent ouf of shape about it, but I believe we made the right choice for our situation.

Edited for the wrong Abigail Kirsch venue.