The Official 'You Can Kiss My @ss' Thread

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Posted by Mimacat

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Posted by ant n tilde

Dear Bowels,
must you be so irritable?

Love, the body you are inside and have NO compassion for

PS i would ask you to kiss my @ss but you are kind of part of my @ss so that wouldn't really work

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I wonder how you'd address an envelope to your bowels.

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Mr. Cocky Poo
123 Instestine Lane
Up-the-creek, LI 11223

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Posted by yelley77

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Posted by Mimacat

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Posted by ant n tilde

Dear Bowels,
must you be so irritable?

Love, the body you are inside and have NO compassion for

PS i would ask you to kiss my @ss but you are kind of part of my @ss so that wouldn't really work

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I wonder how you'd address an envelope to your bowels.

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Mr. Cocky Poo
123 Instestine Lane
Up-the-creek, LI 11223

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that was way better then my sad try

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Posted by TGs Lady 22908

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Posted by yelley77

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Posted by Mimacat

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Posted by ant n tilde

Dear Bowels,
must you be so irritable?

Love, the body you are inside and have NO compassion for

PS i would ask you to kiss my @ss but you are kind of part of my @ss so that wouldn't really work

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I wonder how you'd address an envelope to your bowels.

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Mr. Cocky Poo
123 Instestine Lane
Up-the-creek, LI 11223

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that was way better then my sad try

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LMAO

Dear Long Island Railroad,

I think it's absolutely wonderful that your trains are only considered late if they are at least 5 minutes and 59 seconds late. Those other 5 minutes and 58 seconds are really not important.

I'm glad my train has been only 3-5 minutes 'not late' for the past three weeks.

I hope that you have to commute to your job at LIRR on the LIRR so you can experience the same daily pleasures that I do.

As a special holiday thank you, please kiss my @ss.

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Posted by skinny237

Dear Long Island Railroad,

I think it's absolutely wonderful that your trains are only considered late if they are at least 5 minutes and 59 seconds late. Those other 5 minutes and 58 seconds are really not important.

I'm glad my train has been only 3-5 minutes 'not late' for the past three weeks.

I hope that you have to commute to your job at LIRR on the LIRR so you can experience the same daily pleasures that I do.

As a special holiday thank you, please kiss my @ss.

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dear work,
once again this year i'm on pd. vacation, i need a break from you, you suck. you make me work passed 8 hours, cause you hire call off queens. i am exhausted!! yes my pay is nice, and quit telling me i shouldnt mind, i need the $$ for my wedding, you dont know my finances, and quit calling me to come to work everytime i have a day off, like today i started vacation you called 4 times and woke me, let a girl sleep in. you all can kiss my a$$, i wont be back to work until tuesday. and if you keep calling i'll take a pd. sick day...................sooooo kissssss my a$$$$$$$$$.
signed,
melissa.

Dear Uucontrollable food cravings,

If you do not go away right now I might have to eat the entire contents of the kitchen. then you are going to be sorry because I will work out and work out and work out until you are gone.. But of course you will rear your ugly head once again... GO AWAY!!!! I hate you. I have clothes I have to fit into and people I have to look better than.. you are of NO help to my ever growing rear end... this is an official kiss my a$$

Sincerely,

My size 87 pants

Dear Jury Duty,
Why must you mess up my entire week and force me to sit in an auditorium with strangers with a sore throat and tons of stuff to do at work? Also, why must you ask me to come back a second day and do the same thing only to send me home at 11am and tell me I will only get credit for 1 day. Please explain this to my employer.

I hate you,
Christina

dear employer.
I can do better salary wise and find a better career with a retirement plan!!!! Im going to school soon (just so you know)

KISS MY ***!

also....


To the lovely radio stations

there are soooo many holiday songs out there, WHY WHY WHY must you loop the same 5 songs every hour on the hour??? some people are only able to listen to certain stations at work... its called VARIETY!!!! LEARN IT LIVE IT>>>>

and on top of that Celine Dion and her nails on a chalk board voice can jump on the kiss it train.....

Sincerely,

bleedin ears

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Posted by jeffamanda080808

AS ALWAYS YELLEY IS THINKING!!!


Dear Charles Dolan,

You run a L.I. monopoly and are really beginning to p i s s me off.

You Can Kiss My @SS.

Sincerely,
A ticked off customer

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Who's Dolan? Mary MOB

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Posted by debismom

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Posted by jeffamanda080808

AS ALWAYS YELLEY IS THINKING!!!


Dear Charles Dolan,

You run a L.I. monopoly and are really beginning to p i s s me off.

You Can Kiss My @SS.

Sincerely,
A ticked off customer

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Who's Dolan? Mary MOB

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The owner of Cablevision.Charles Dolan

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Posted by jeffamanda080808

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Posted by debismom

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Posted by jeffamanda080808

AS ALWAYS YELLEY IS THINKING!!!


Dear Charles Dolan,

You run a L.I. monopoly and are really beginning to p i s s me off.

You Can Kiss My @SS.

Sincerely,
A ticked off customer

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Who's Dolan? Mary MOB

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The owner of Cablevision.Charles Dolan

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Oh, ok. Mary MOB

Dear 'work' (and all other businesses that are ignoring that there is a blizzard outside),

It's hailing, on top of 3 inches of snow and the roads are slippery. Why oh why do you insist on staying open and force me to leave at 5 and then sit in traffic for at least 2 hours... last month, when we had that awful rain that caused floods everywhere, it took me two hours to get home.

Anywho, thanks for ignoring the situation at hand... you are the best.

Love always,
disgruntled employee

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Posted by yelley77

Dear 'work' (and all other businesses that are ignoring that there is a blizzard outside),

It's hailing, on top of 3 inches of snow and the roads are slippery. Why oh why do you insist on staying open and force me to leave at 5 and then sit in traffic for at least 2 hours... last month, when we had that awful rain that caused floods everywhere, it took me two hours to get home.

Anywho, thanks for ignoring the situation at hand... you are the best.

Love always,
disgruntled employee

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I second that!

Dear future employer,
You told me over a week ago that I got the job, and that you'd send the salary proposal THAT NIGHT. I'm still waiting...I have a wedding to budget for, as well as the holidays and my FH's birthday. Please stop sucking and just send the damn thing so I can start earning money.

Also, since FH works for you currently, I'd like to tell you kiss my @ss on his behalf as well... the school district you sent him to today is CLOSED... yet you told them it wouldn't be a problem for him to be part of their 'child care' program today even though he's part of their 'afterschool progams' not their 'CHILD CARE'
The roads are awful, you know he's sick, and you promised he'd be there even though the school said they could make other arrangments today.

KISS OUR @ss.
~disgruntled soon to be employee and even more disgruntled fiance of one of your employees lol

Dear Make-up Customer that walked out on me last Saturday without buying anything from me after I spent 45 minutes explaining skincare to you and applying a full face of make-up on you!

As everyone else was selling perfume set after perfume set raking in lots of commission...I was kind enough to help you find the 'perfect' foundation that you 'supposedly' wanted to buy! Then you asked about eyeshadows because you loved the colors I had on...so I put them on you and you said you loved them and had to have them!
I turned my head for 1 minute to get the foundation you told me you were buying and you were gone!!!!!!!!!!!
That's f-ed up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hope you break out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Posted by Princess Cut Bride

Dear Make-up Customer that walked out on me last Saturday without buying anything from me after I spent 45 minutes explaining skincare to you and applying a full face of make-up on you!

As everyone else was selling perfume set after perfume set raking in lots of commission...I was kind enough to help you find the 'perfect' foundation that you 'supposedly' wanted to buy! Then you asked about eyeshadows because you loved the colors I had on...so I put them on you and you said you loved them and had to have them!
I turned my head for 1 minute to get the foundation you told me you were buying and you were gone!!!!!!!!!!!
That's f-ed up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hope you break out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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you forgot:

I hope you break out and when you do, you can KISS MY @SS!!!!

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Posted by jeffamanda080808

Very good Yelley!!!!!!!!!!!! I didn't know that we had the same boss!!!

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LOL