Very sad about wedding....

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Posted by cublica82

If you dont have a large guest list it is sooo possible to have a wedding thats not $20,000!!!
I kept my guest list to 84(I orginally wanted 50) but its still intimate. Aside from the all inclusive venues, which really could be a great option, there are so many halls that dont have a high min or too much $ pp. esp if you do fri night sat or sun day. i was getting married at the miller beach surf club in miller place. it is VERY affordable, their packages and prices are on their website and they specialize in smaller weddings. It would only cost you about 3000-6500 depending on your menu and number of guests. also, for photo you can get pics on cd and buy your albums later. i was using lighthouse photography and he has a package for cd pics high res and you own the rights for only $800 and u can get a basic dj set up for about 800-1100. I made my own centerpieces which are candles cause they are way cheaper and they look gorgeous!!!! and i only spent 60 bucks on them for 11 tables!! My dress i only paid 700 and its gorg!!! u can do donation cards instead of favors and print your own invites. mine came out better than my friends that had theirs made!! as far as honeymoon, i was dying to take one right away too, but soo many people either take a mini moon or wait and use their gift money and book at a later time. it will still be your honeymoon and then you will have something to still look forward to after the wedding! Punta cana is beautiful and fairly inexpensive. i found my wedding shoes at burlington coat factory for 11 bucks and they are so pretty. u just have to do some legwork but trust me its possible! sorry so long but i really felt for you....we were going through same thing. my FH was out of work for a yr and then in between jobs so i basically paid for the whole wedding :( also, i didnt have a bridal party to save on flowers and gifts. theres also always destination weddings!!! i had my heart set on one from the beginning but it didnt work out. that will save u a lot of $ and your honeymoon is right there. GOOD LUCK :)

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Sounds like you guys should chat. I def. don't think you should take getting marrid at a RH that isn't all inclusive out of the mix. When you add in what you need/want- basic dj can be cheap. (FM entertainment) just get the dj not the MC.. and i heard the combo is good! Centerpieces - do it yourself! candles are always beautiful! or low centerpieces- if you have 80 gues thats 8 or 7 tables depending on hall. That would be like 350 from like ******* for low cp. Photo/video just get the cd like she said. We are getting our album made but we are making the parents album ourselves. You def. can do it!! Ask everyone for help and ideas!!!

Manor east in Massapequa has an all inclusive package as well. A girl at work says it starts around 7k.

I am lucky enough to have my mom who is going above and beyond but if I didnt these are the things I would have looked into!! Good luck! let me know if you need anything!


---- EDIT---

Did some searching

http://manoreastcaterers.com/index.php?p=packagetemp&did=5

Thats there smalled package. YES is is 13,000 but that is for 100 maybe it will be less if you have less people. You can ask if video goes to ceremony site. (there are like 5 churches within like 10min of there- if traveling for the video/photo is an issue)

your dress- you can def get a decent prices same with tux.

Bridal party- either don't have one or do very small gifts. I dont know if flowers for them would be included but if not you can totally get flowers from somehwere there day off. SOOO MUCH CHEAPER..

Honeymoon- either do a honeymoon registry or wait. So many people wait now! GOOD LUCK

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Posted by VCanizalez

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Posted by bethie853

Aawwwww girl don't stress too much! You have time to look around and the best girls around to help you here on LIW!! Everyone can help you pull stuff together just wait and see!

Remember to look at days other than Saturday, we saved a bunch doing a Sunday, and remember you can negotiate negotiate negotiate!

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We doing a Snday wedding....
Sep 25 2011 or Oct 2 2011....


Thank u chica...
this is just... heartbreaking....

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You should maybe check into the months that are a little bit cheaper. I know sept and oct are higher cost months. Also A lot of places let you do payments here and there. Thats what we are doing. We are dropping off payments every month. It's rough and sometimes we are like this is crazy especially since we are already married but I really want to be a bride I want to walk down teh aisle to my husband.Say our Vows, so we are doing it. Aug, Sept, and Dec are killers b.c I have to pay for my kids bdays, bday presents and xmas presents. Which is all costly. But it will work out. You just need to set a budget for yourselves.

Veronica , I can sympathize with you b/c FH and I are also on a tight budget.

My suggestions would be:
1) Catholic Church--we are only paying 450 for ours with music--our music is the organist from the church. not sure if pre-cana is gonna cost anything. FOCCUS costs 50 bucks. so figure about 5-600 for your church. (hopefully you come in under budget)
2) have a smaller bridal party!! our mistake is having a large bridal party..which means---more money for limo, gifts, etc.
3) for a rehersal dinner do something simple like at someone's house pizza's and bottles of beer and wine.
4) Church-if your church will allow it--don't do flowers! just put bows at the end of the aisle ---you can get these in Michaels...i think it's 12 for 24 bucks...use a coupon! wait til you get a 50 off one!
5) Make your own centerpieces out of candels!!! Also if you are thinking of the fall you could get mums at a local farm stand (or takea ride out east--they are 3 for 12 dollars usually) and if you only have 80 people you only need about 9....which means....36 bucks!!! and people can bring them home to plant and they come up every year so every year they can think of you and FH
6) bouquets--do very simple....
7) only get FH a bout and your dad and his dad--the whole bridal party does not need a boutinere
8) Dress---check out David's Bridal---i tried on plenty of dreses there for 500 or less....also they do the 99 dollar sale...
9) Tux-his should be free with the groomsmen rentals
10) Video for ceremony---have a friend do it--yes it won't be pennylane or couped up but it will get the job done and your vows will be recorded for ever!
11) photography-you could try searching Craigs List for a photographer or call a local newspaper-a lot of the reporters take their own pics for stories and have high tech cameras....ask around....you might be surprised and find someone who does photography as a side job or a hobby. You could also call local colleges who have this as a major (or School of Visual Arts in the city) and ask if they ahve any students that might be interested. And make your own albums!!! You can do this after teh wedding and save up for it after! my gf got married last oct and still hasn't gotten her album!!! usually you don't get them right away
12) extra decorations---just remember less is more!!!!!!! you could look at oriental trading for extras if you must have them
13) I know we all have our hearts set on a weekend wedding but if you do a thursday night it is way cheaper!! Also I have a friend getting married this columbus day which is a money. They are having an afternoon ceremony at Vineyard Caterers adn they are only paying 60 a person!!!

13) I second Miller Beach Surf Club. There package is very reasonable. I believe for a Thursday night Buffet it is 53 per person for the top shelf liquor. you could cut it down 5 a person by only having beer and wine.
14) honeymoon--take a few days somehere and then do the big honeymoon later. you could drive up to Vermont for a few days and go hiking and exploring. Plus if you wait till columbus day monday--the leaves will be changing color!!!!!

You can make this work!!! Remember-the day is yours and what you make it!!!! Not everyone needs to do the big shebang wedding!!! It will still be beautiful no matter what you do b/c it is yours!!!!!!
HTH

Oh one more thing my big mouth forgot......
go to a local florist for bouquets....MUCH cheaper than using a wedding florist!! thats what we did and for what I wanted it saved us a significant amount of loot!

we are in the same position...we have a child to take care of and i lost my good paying job last year and im working a no so good paying one just to help with the bills

we are doing a lot of it ourselves and we are taking a honeymoon a couple months after our wedding to save up money to go...maybe this could be an option for you?

we are just going to spend a night in the city and go on our 'real' honeymoon in april when we are getting married in november

awww veronica, don't be sad!

I think you can definitely have your wedding for less than 22000 if your guestlist is 60-75 like you said!

You have the right idea with getting an all inclusive package. Aside from that, check prices in Nov/Dec/Jan/Feb and see if the prices are lower then.

You can get a beautiful dress without spending thousands by getting a sample dress or sales. Several girls on this site got their dress for under 1000 at David's bridal.

Evita got a Carolina Herrera dress for like 800 I believe by going to running of the brides. I've seen that dress on other sites for over 2500! It's all about doing your research and putting in a little leg work!

You can also have a fun honeymoon without going bankrupt. You loved Miami - other parts of florida are BEAUTIFUL and really romantic. Naples for one has gorgeous beaches. You can really save money on airfare by staying in the state

Don't beat yourself up - you and FH are one of the youngest couples on this site and moved here less than a decade a go. You guys are just getting started in your professional lives so of course it is a struggle.

And as for friends - we are here for you and we'll help with ideas to save whenever you need it! And I'm with Amy, I'll come too!!

YES! YES! YES! Miller beach Surf club! So pretty and quaint...if I didnt have more than 120 guests I def would have it there!!!


PLEASE look online at it!! They have brunch specials for like $30 pp!!!! SOOOOOOOO NICE!

awww Veronica don't be discouraged, the other girls have already given you great advice so I wouldn't repeat it.

Fh and I aren't going on our honeymoon right away, we'll wait a little while. Maybe you can delay that a little bit.

I'm so sorry you're upset Veronica.

Wait to take a honeymoon. Keep in mind you will be getting money as gifts from most of your guests that should help. Is there anybody, your parents, his parents, grandparents that are willing to help? Even if it is just paying for the photog or something, everything helps

Are there things you can cut back in your life style now? Not going to dinner as much? No more vacations? etc

Are there things you can cut back in the wedding?

Also keep in mind that your guest list is not the final headcount! Typically 10-30% of the invitees say 'no'!!!!

Awww..everything usually has a way of working out

Try Douglaston Manor they have a package that includes photo and video

Ariana Waterfall has a package that includes photos, video, DJ, flowers and Limo
You would only need to get your dress

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Posted by Tromsugar2b

you know pricing in the winter months is a worlddd apart from spring/summer and fall from what I looked at, maybe you wanna consider moving your wedding to dec, jan feb mar? Also don't stress about honeymoon, you will go on tons of vacations with FH throughout your life, this one dosent need to be perfect, you just wanna go away somewhere to relax and celebrate, dosent need to be over the top! Also a lot of people hold off on the honeymoon and go away for just a weekend right after, this would make a lot of sense if you got married in the winter months, but a lot of people do it just because of scheduling/work stuff. Don't stress you'll find a way!!

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Thank u....
I will def try to chek prices....
I dont want to move wedding date, but if it will help a lot... then I could move to november...

The problem is for the winter, I get knee pains because I have Menicus Tear =( when its cold, I am always on pain.. so technically ALL winter I am on pain wit my knee... and I dont want to be in pain when I have the wedding...
But i will def check that =)
Gracias!

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Posted by cublica82

If you dont have a large guest list it is sooo possible to have a wedding thats not $20,000!!!
I kept my guest list to 84(I orginally wanted 50) but its still intimate. Aside from the all inclusive venues, which really could be a great option, there are so many halls that dont have a high min or too much $ pp. esp if you do fri night sat or sun day. i was getting married at the miller beach surf club in miller place. it is VERY affordable, their packages and prices are on their website and they specialize in smaller weddings. It would only cost you about 3000-6500 depending on your menu and number of guests. also, for photo you can get pics on cd and buy your albums later. i was using lighthouse photography and he has a package for cd pics high res and you own the rights for only $800 and u can get a basic dj set up for about 800-1100. I made my own centerpieces which are candles cause they are way cheaper and they look gorgeous!!!! and i only spent 60 bucks on them for 11 tables!! My dress i only paid 700 and its gorg!!! u can do donation cards instead of favors and print your own invites. mine came out better than my friends that had theirs made!! as far as honeymoon, i was dying to take one right away too, but soo many people either take a mini moon or wait and use their gift money and book at a later time. it will still be your honeymoon and then you will have something to still look forward to after the wedding! Punta cana is beautiful and fairly inexpensive. i found my wedding shoes at burlington coat factory for 11 bucks and they are so pretty. u just have to do some legwork but trust me its possible! sorry so long but i really felt for you....we were going through same thing. my FH was out of work for a yr and then in between jobs so i basically paid for the whole wedding :( also, i didnt have a bridal party to save on flowers and gifts. theres also always destination weddings!!! i had my heart set on one from the beginning but it didnt work out. that will save u a lot of $ and your honeymoon is right there. GOOD LUCK :)

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Thank u so much!
I will def. check the Miller place... Sounds great!
I check that and prices are great =)

No destination weddings =( I wanna walk down the Altar with Parents there... Paretns cant go to another states with us... =(

I will def. do ALL of my 'legwork'...

I will do the DiY things.... =)...

Thanks... WOW I am overmel i think w/o the whole process....
but i appreciate it and will look into all of this!

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Posted by FutureMrsRufle2011

You took the words right out of my mouth. I always dreamed of getting married in the fall with sunflowers everywhere because I'm obssessed with sunflowers but if I wanted a 'big' wedding at the RH I am having it at, I needed to have a winter wedding, so thats what I did. I don't regret it one bit because utimately I am marrying the man of my dreams and thats all that matter, not when and where it is! As for the honeymoon, I'm not going on one, we wanted a house and I would rather not spend the money on an outrageous vacation and save it for our one year anniversary! I hope you feel better sweetie!!! and BTW, I think I saw that you work at Fox hollow????? I worked there for many years....Dave Gerrin or Tony Scotto couldn't hook you up???????

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Thanks Honey..... I will do that....

Ur right, at the end of the day, I will be marryin the Man of my Life....

I went to a party in Fox Hollow... never work there =(....

Thank u so much!
U are right!
we never though that, we could save the honeymoon money towards OUR House Dream =)

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Posted by harts2976

[
Sounds like you guys should chat. I def. don't think you should take getting marrid at a RH that isn't all inclusive out of the mix. When you add in what you need/want- basic dj can be cheap. (FM entertainment) just get the dj not the MC.. and i heard the combo is good! Centerpieces - do it yourself! candles are always beautiful! or low centerpieces- if you have 80 gues thats 8 or 7 tables depending on hall. That would be like 350 from like ******* for low cp. Photo/video just get the cd like she said. We are getting our album made but we are making the parents album ourselves. You def. can do it!! Ask everyone for help and ideas!!!

Manor east in Massapequa has an all inclusive package as well. A girl at work says it starts around 7k.

I am lucky enough to have my mom who is going above and beyond but if I didnt these are the things I would have looked into!! Good luck! let me know if you need anything!


---- EDIT---

Did some searching

http://manoreastcaterers.com/index.php?p=packagetemp&did=5

Thats there smalled package. YES is is 13,000 but that is for 100 maybe it will be less if you have less people. You can ask if video goes to ceremony site. (there are like 5 churches within like 10min of there- if traveling for the video/photo is an issue)

your dress- you can def get a decent prices same with tux.

Bridal party- either don't have one or do very small gifts. I dont know if flowers for them would be included but if not you can totally get flowers from somehwere there day off. SOOO MUCH CHEAPER..

Honeymoon- either do a honeymoon registry or wait. So many people wait now! GOOD LUCK

---

Thank u so much!!!!!!!

Ur right I coudl def use those packages n photography!!!
DIY centerpieces are a MUST do then.....
thanks!!!!!!

---

Posted by Leia1920

Veronica , I can sympathize with you b/c FH and I are also on a tight budget.

My suggestions would be:
1) Catholic Church--we are only paying 450 for ours with music--our music is the organist from the church. not sure if pre-cana is gonna cost anything. FOCCUS costs 50 bucks. so figure about 5-600 for your church. (hopefully you come in under budget)
2) have a smaller bridal party!! our mistake is having a large bridal party..which means---more money for limo, gifts, etc.
3) for a rehersal dinner do something simple like at someone's house pizza's and bottles of beer and wine.
4) Church-if your church will allow it--don't do flowers! just put bows at the end of the aisle ---you can get these in Michaels...i think it's 12 for 24 bucks...use a coupon! wait til you get a 50 off one!
5) Make your own centerpieces out of candels!!! Also if you are thinking of the fall you could get mums at a local farm stand (or takea ride out east--they are 3 for 12 dollars usually) and if you only have 80 people you only need about 9....which means....36 bucks!!! and people can bring them home to plant and they come up every year so every year they can think of you and FH
6) bouquets--do very simple....
7) only get FH a bout and your dad and his dad--the whole bridal party does not need a boutinere
8) Dress---check out David's Bridal---i tried on plenty of dreses there for 500 or less....also they do the 99 dollar sale...
9) Tux-his should be free with the groomsmen rentals
10) Video for ceremony---have a friend do it--yes it won't be pennylane or couped up but it will get the job done and your vows will be recorded for ever!
11) photography-you could try searching Craigs List for a photographer or call a local newspaper-a lot of the reporters take their own pics for stories and have high tech cameras....ask around....you might be surprised and find someone who does photography as a side job or a hobby. You could also call local colleges who have this as a major (or School of Visual Arts in the city) and ask if they ahve any students that might be interested. And make your own albums!!! You can do this after teh wedding and save up for it after! my gf got married last oct and still hasn't gotten her album!!! usually you don't get them right away
12) extra decorations---just remember less is more!!!!!!! you could look at oriental trading for extras if you must have them
13) I know we all have our hearts set on a weekend wedding but if you do a thursday night it is way cheaper!! Also I have a friend getting married this columbus day which is a money. They are having an afternoon ceremony at Vineyard Caterers adn they are only paying 60 a person!!!

13) I second Miller Beach Surf Club. There package is very reasonable. I believe for a Thursday night Buffet it is 53 per person for the top shelf liquor. you could cut it down 5 a person by only having beer and wine.
14) honeymoon--take a few days somehere and then do the big honeymoon later. you could drive up to Vermont for a few days and go hiking and exploring. Plus if you wait till columbus day monday--the leaves will be changing color!!!!!

You can make this work!!! Remember-the day is yours and what you make it!!!! Not everyone needs to do the big shebang wedding!!! It will still be beautiful no matter what you do b/c it is yours!!!!!!
HTH

---

Thank u so much for all of this!!!
This is def helptful!!!
The Miller place has a GREAT package!!!
That sounds great, jut taking a little vacation just to get away... Never bee to Vermont so mayb thats a good idea!!!

THANK U SO MUCH!!!! THANK U....

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Posted by VCanizalez

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Posted by harts2976

[
Sounds like you guys should chat. I def. don't think you should take getting marrid at a RH that isn't all inclusive out of the mix. When you add in what you need/want- basic dj can be cheap. (FM entertainment) just get the dj not the MC.. and i heard the combo is good! Centerpieces - do it yourself! candles are always beautiful! or low centerpieces- if you have 80 gues thats 8 or 7 tables depending on hall. That would be like 350 from like ******* for low cp. Photo/video just get the cd like she said. We are getting our album made but we are making the parents album ourselves. You def. can do it!! Ask everyone for help and ideas!!!

Manor east in Massapequa has an all inclusive package as well. A girl at work says it starts around 7k.

I am lucky enough to have my mom who is going above and beyond but if I didnt these are the things I would have looked into!! Good luck! let me know if you need anything!


---- EDIT---

Did some searching

http://manoreastcaterers.com/index.php?p=packagetemp&did=5

Thats there smalled package. YES is is 13,000 but that is for 100 maybe it will be less if you have less people. You can ask if video goes to ceremony site. (there are like 5 churches within like 10min of there- if traveling for the video/photo is an issue)

your dress- you can def get a decent prices same with tux.

Bridal party- either don't have one or do very small gifts. I dont know if flowers for them would be included but if not you can totally get flowers from somehwere there day off. SOOO MUCH CHEAPER..

Honeymoon- either do a honeymoon registry or wait. So many people wait now! GOOD LUCK

---

Thank u so much!!!!!!!

Ur right I coudl def use those packages n photography!!!
DIY centerpieces are a MUST do then.....
thanks!!!!!!

---

if you did manor east-- or the packages some where i believe they include centerpieces... there they do a dozen roses. if you still want to dress it up you can do little candles everywhere- buy in bulk- 200 for like 40 dollars on whilesale websites

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Posted by mybabylovesmoi

awww veronica, don't be sad!

I think you can definitely have your wedding for less than 22000 if your guestlist is 60-75 like you said!

You have the right idea with getting an all inclusive package. Aside from that, check prices in Nov/Dec/Jan/Feb and see if the prices are lower then.

You can get a beautiful dress without spending thousands by getting a sample dress or sales. Several girls on this site got their dress for under 1000 at David's bridal.

Evita got a Carolina Herrera dress for like 800 I believe by going to running of the brides. I've seen that dress on other sites for over 2500! It's all about doing your research and putting in a little leg work!

You can also have a fun honeymoon without going bankrupt. You loved Miami - other parts of florida are BEAUTIFUL and really romantic. Naples for one has gorgeous beaches. You can really save money on airfare by staying in the state

Don't beat yourself up - you and FH are one of the youngest couples on this site and moved here less than a decade a go. You guys are just getting started in your professional lives so of course it is a struggle.

And as for friends - we are here for you and we'll help with ideas to save whenever you need it! And I'm with Amy, I'll come too!!

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Awwwww You will alsoo fit in right? =) I am sure... As long as i have pupusas =) Lol....
Which most likely I will!!! LOL I need pupusas in the wedding!!!!!!!!! hahahahahahaha
Thanks so much...

I think i am strugglin to much...
I have to do the same thig as Evita.. =)

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Posted by J79

I'm so sorry you're upset Veronica.

Wait to take a honeymoon. Keep in mind you will be getting money as gifts from most of your guests that should help. Is there anybody, your parents, his parents, grandparents that are willing to help? Even if it is just paying for the photog or something, everything helps

Are there things you can cut back in your life style now? Not going to dinner as much? No more vacations? etc

Are there things you can cut back in the wedding?

Also keep in mind that your guest list is not the final headcount! Typically 10-30% of the invitees say 'no'!!!!

---

We are cutting a lot of things now....
Miami vacation was th FIRST vacation we taken...
Plus, saving money for a house add ups to the struggle of the wedding $....
My paretns will help us wiht soemthing, I dunno what,... But they said its a surprise... I know its $ because my mom told me...
Maybe i should ASK how muhc $ =)

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Posted by VCanizalez

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Posted by J79

I'm so sorry you're upset Veronica.

Wait to take a honeymoon. Keep in mind you will be getting money as gifts from most of your guests that should help. Is there anybody, your parents, his parents, grandparents that are willing to help? Even if it is just paying for the photog or something, everything helps

Are there things you can cut back in your life style now? Not going to dinner as much? No more vacations? etc

Are there things you can cut back in the wedding?

Also keep in mind that your guest list is not the final headcount! Typically 10-30% of the invitees say 'no'!!!!

---

We are cutting a lot of things now....
Miami vacation was th FIRST vacation we taken...
Plus, saving money for a house add ups to the struggle of the wedding $....
My paretns will help us wiht soemthing, I dunno what,... But they said its a surprise... I know its $ because my mom told me...
Maybe i should ASK how muhc $ =)

---

I would def ask how much. Only bc you need to know the budget your working with. are they giving you $500 or $5000. it makes a HUGE diff.

things will work out love!