What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

JuneBride2005 Posted: Apr 29, 2004 11:57 AM

What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

I really don't want to 'lose' my last name, so i was thinking of making it a legal middle name (although I already have one). I have heard of people doing that...it is just too long a name to hyphenate, and I really don't want to just drop it totally. I was wondering what everyone else was doing...

katebloom99 Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:03 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

My mom did that when she married - she made her maiden name her middle name and took my stepfathers last name.

Personally, I can't wait to get rid of my last name b/c I have never liked it. So I will be taking my fh's.

shelly3950 Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:04 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

I think thats a great idea.

AJsMommy122 Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:04 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

Posted by katebloom99

Personally, I can't wait to get rid of my last name b/c I have never liked it. So I will be taking my fh's.

Same here!!!! I love FH's last name!

nylibride Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:15 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

I'm having a really hard time with this. I think I want to somehow legally add his last name, but I'm not sure if I'm actually going to use it personally? professionally? Ugh. I really can't decide. Is anyone else finding it hard? I sort of feel like I already have a name that I'm very attached to. I think it is a personal decision for each person. I don't have a general opinion on this at all. Help!

DrmnBlnd Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:15 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

I am taking his. I can't wait!

november12003 Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:16 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

Posted by JuneBride2005

I really don't want to 'lose' my last name, so i was thinking of making it a legal middle name (although I already have one). I have heard of people doing that...it is just too long a name to hyphenate, and I really don't want to just drop it totally. I was wondering what everyone else was doing...

I read somewhere that in NYS you cannot change your maiden name to your middle name, you can only take his or hyphenate.

JuneBride2005 Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:19 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

Posted by november12003

Posted by JuneBride2005

I really don't want to 'lose' my last name, so i was thinking of making it a legal middle name (although I already have one). I have heard of people doing that...it is just too long a name to hyphenate, and I really don't want to just drop it totally. I was wondering what everyone else was doing...

I read somewhere that in NYS you cannot change your maiden name to your middle name, you can only take his or hyphenate.

My friend's aunt and my mother's cousin both did this with their maiden names...they both live in NY state...have they changed the laws?

Xelindrya Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:19 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

Other:

in true Spanish form.. I just added his.

So Im a four named freak!

First, Middle, Maiden, Last

DMV wouldnt allow four names so I just made my middle name my last name. It was easier for them. I also just sign First, Maiden, Last

sammi102 Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:19 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

I'll be taking his name!

hbradio Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:19 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

Posted by JuneBride2005

I really don't want to 'lose' my last name, so i was thinking of making it a legal middle name (although I already have one). I have heard of people doing that...it is just too long a name to hyphenate, and I really don't want to just drop it totally. I was wondering what everyone else was doing...

This is what I wanted to do and I heard in NY they dont let you do that. I hope what I heard is not true. I love my future last name but I feel like dropping my old one, I will lose a part of my dad as weird as that may sound. I always want to have that name with me.

anne_nyc Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:21 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

I really want to just add my fiancee's last name to mine. I want to share a last name with my husband and children but I also don't want to lose the name I have had for 28 years!

tracyg Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:22 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

just taking his, dropping mine.

I can't lose my middle name since thats what my dad REALLY wanted to name me, and calls me by it. So thats more special to me than my last name. Plus i don't really like my current last name.

OctBride05 Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:31 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

i am dropping mine and taking his

FeliciaDA Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:35 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

I'm taking FH's name

I will miss my name a bit. But my name is so long, always mispronounced and misspelled, that in some ways I cannot wait to take FH's .. though his tends to get mispronounced a lot also (but at least its shorter! LOL)

May2704bride Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:40 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

I will officially take his last name but for the work purposes I will still use my current last name until I can get used to using his

laudipop Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:42 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

Oh, I have big issues with this one. It's like all my feminist tendencies somehow just got focused on the name issue! It makes me so mad that I'm expected to change my name--a huge part of my life for 34 years now--but FH isn't! It's just patently unfair, and nobody seems to care. Why should we change our names? Why shouldn't men change their names?

I'm so sick of having to defend myself on this one! People look at me like I have two heads. My brother informed me that he'll still call me by FH's last name, anyway. Nice.

diamondgrlie Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:44 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

Im taking his but I am NOT happy about it. I love my Italian sounding last name and his is... I have no idea, he doesnt either! (Its either french or german but sounds spanish)

oneday Posted: Apr 29, 2004 12:51 PM

Re: What are you doing iwth your last name after you are married?

Posted by laudipop

Oh, I have big issues with this one. It's like all my feminist tendencies somehow just got focused on the name issue! It makes me so mad that I'm expected to change my name--a huge part of my life for 34 years now--but FH isn't! It's just patently unfair, and nobody seems to care. Why should we change our names? Why shouldn't men change their names?

I'm so sick of having to defend myself on this one! People look at me like I have two heads. My brother informed me that he'll still call me by FH's last name, anyway. Nice.

I know what you mean, I didn't think it seemed fair that I was expected to just let go of my name and take his. We decided to both hyphenate (unfortunately, neither of our last names was very short, so it's sometimes a bit of a PITA) but DH understood why I wouldn't want to lose mine and he agreed that if I would take his, he'd take mine on too. It causes a lot of confusion sometimes (the DMV tried to tell us he COULDN'T hyphenate his name) and some people just refuse to use both (I want to say, 'Alright, then since your name is Smith, I'll just call you Jones instead.' ) but, I really just felt like it was part of who I am and didn't want to lose that.