What do you call your FILs??

johnsae Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:14 PM

What do you call your FILs??

I just found out that I will be calling my future ILs 'Mr. and Mrs. B' for the rest of my life, even after I become 'Mrs. B'! I'm sorry, but there's a time and a place for manners....I know these people so well, but they are so old-fashioned, so I have to play the 'Mr. and Mrs.' game for the rest of my lives. I find it a bit annoying - anyone else with me??

Soon2BeMrs2006 Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:16 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

Posted by johnsae

I just found out that I will be calling my future ILs 'Mr. and Mrs. B' for the rest of my life, even after I become 'Mrs. B'! I'm sorry, but there's a time and a place for manners....I know these people so well, but they are so old-fashioned, so I have to play the 'Mr. and Mrs.' game for the rest of my lives. I find it a bit annoying - anyone else with me??

ouch did they tell you to call them this? mine said to call them mom and dad, but I haven't felt comfty to do that yet so i'm calling them mama t and papa j for now.

otherme Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:17 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

that stinks! are you close with them? Perhaps you could ask them what they prefer.. if they say Mr. and Mrs. B you could ask them why. Or just ask them if its ok if you call them by their first names

WedHead Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:17 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

They asked that you call them Mr. and Mrs. forever? That's a bit formal for family. I call my ILs by their first names.

MissingTheBGene Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:18 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

Right now, it's 'Mr. & Mrs.', after the wedding, I'm sure 'Mom & Dad' will slip out eventually.

waterspout4 Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:19 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

I have been brought up to call parents by Mr. and Mrs. _____. I knew this would change after marriage. But FH's family and friends call their parents by first names. So his mom wants me to call her by her first name. I'm having such a problem doing this.

But we need to call them what they want. I guess it's a small price. Look at the awful things that some IL are doing. If calling them by their first name is my only problem, I'll deal.

soon2bmrsdunn Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:22 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

I will call them mom and dad. I already call his mom, mom and his dad I would use Mr. D but I normally just start talking to him and never really have to address him.

103005FallBride Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:23 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

'Hey You!' is what I'm most comfortable with...

I'm honestly not comfortable with calling them Mom and Dad. Just me. Maybe in time, but not anytime soon.
I don't feel comfortable calling them by their first names either...I find that disrespectful in a way.

So...Hey You is what it's come down to because she hates that I still call her Mrs. E and him Mr. E...

'Hey You'...

Katie&Chris2006 Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:24 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

Yikes...I know how you feel because I think the same thing is going to happen to me. It's gonna be so weird, especially since I think my parents will have FH call them Mom and Dad.

johnsae Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:24 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

yeah, FH's Dad has some hangup with 'respect', and I have spoken with my FBIL and FSIL about it and they seem to think that it will never change...I'll bring it up at some point, but I think that it is going to stick

103005FallBride Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:26 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

Posted by johnsae

yeah, FH's Dad has some hangup with 'respect', and I have spoken with my FBIL and FSIL about it and they seem to think that it will never change...I'll bring it up at some point, but I think that it is going to stick

Can I please change ILs with you... I can't bear to call my ILs 'Mom and Dad' and SHE'S dying to hear it.

johnsae Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:29 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

Posted by 103005FallBride

Posted by johnsae

yeah, FH's Dad has some hangup with 'respect', and I have spoken with my FBIL and FSIL about it and they seem to think that it will never change...I'll bring it up at some point, but I think that it is going to stick

Can I please change ILs with you... I can't bear to call my ILs 'Mom and Dad' and SHE'S dying to hear it.

no thanks, I think that's weird too!
I would never be able to call them Mom and Dad, I just want to call them by their first names

103005FallBride Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:30 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

Posted by johnsae

Posted by 103005FallBride

Posted by johnsae

yeah, FH's Dad has some hangup with 'respect', and I have spoken with my FBIL and FSIL about it and they seem to think that it will never change...I'll bring it up at some point, but I think that it is going to stick

Can I please change ILs with you... I can't bear to call my ILs 'Mom and Dad' and SHE'S dying to hear it.

no thanks, I think that's weird too!
I would never be able to call them Mom and Dad, I just want to call them by their first names

Damn! I thought I was onto something for a minute!

ali120206 Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:31 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

My friend and I were talking about this last night. I think I'm going to avoid calling them anything unless I necessarily have to (that's what she's doing right now).

I don't think I'd be comfortable calling them mom or dad and I know I wouldn't be comfortable calling them by their first names after calling them Mr. and Mrs. for so long.

weddingbunny Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:37 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

Posted by 103005FallBride

'Hey You!' is what I'm most comfortable with...

I'm honestly not comfortable with calling them Mom and Dad. Just me. Maybe in time, but not anytime soon.
I don't feel comfortable calling them by their first names either...I find that disrespectful in a way.

So...Hey You is what it's come down to because she hates that I still call her Mrs. E and him Mr. E...

'Hey You'...

Yeah, that's kind of my approach too... I really don't know that I will ever be comfortable calling them mom and dad - and honestly, I just don't WANT to call them mom and dad. They are not my parents. It just doesn't feel right.

And for years I called them Mr. and Mrs. so now it just feels kind of strange to call them by their first names, but they want me to treat them 'like family' so I try to just avoid calling them by name if I can.

It is a bit strange to be asked to call them Mr. and Mrs. for life... I think I might be kind of hurt, and feel like they didn't want me to be a part of their family. Strange.

Mrs. dleeny Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:37 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

Posted by johnsae

yeah, FH's Dad has some hangup with 'respect', and I have spoken with my FBIL and FSIL about it and they seem to think that it will never change...I'll bring it up at some point, but I think that it is going to stick

all I have to say is...

give me a BREAK!

ETA: I call my MIL by her first name. Mom just seems wrong to me, she's not my mother.

SPITSBRIDE Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:38 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

I just call them by their first names and my husband calls my parents by their first names also.

johnsae Posted: Jan 04, 2006 01:39 PM

Re: What do you call your FILs??

Posted by dleeny

Posted by johnsae

yeah, FH's Dad has some hangup with 'respect', and I have spoken with my FBIL and FSIL about it and they seem to think that it will never change...I'll bring it up at some point, but I think that it is going to stick
all I have to say is...

give me a BREAK!

ETA: I call my MIL by her first name. Mom just seems wrong to me, she's not my mother.