Help! My FMIL has made us an offer that I'm not sure we can refuse - and I feel like I'd be making a pact with the devil!
My FMIL is divorced and has a very nice home in Suffolk County. She has only about 70 k left on her mortgage. She asked my FH if he and I would like to take over the mortgage and have the house put in our names (just he and I) and live there with her.
Here's the thing: I want to own a home in the worst way, but at the rate we're saving and the way prices are rising, it will be 5 years or so before we can buy anything. And I'd like to have a child and stay home for the first few years, etc. I don't think I could afford to stay home with our child at all if we bought a house.
My FMIL is a nut, and usually I can't stand to be around her for more than a day. On the one hand it seems my decision should be no way - do not live with her. On the other, I may not be able to do the things I really want to do (have a home and a child) without her.
I should add that FH and I have been living together for 4 years, so it wouldn't be like we'd be starting out with his mom. I am really torn - please advise! Thanks!
Cindy
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Re: Who would live with their MIL/FMIL? LONG
Never in a million years!!!!!
Meg9-20-02
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Re: Who would live with their MIL/FMIL? LONG
We moved in with my MIL for a few months due to major problems with an apartment we were renting (let's just say we had to leave this apartment after being there for only 2&1/2 weeks). We lived on the lower floor of a high ranch. We had our own 1/2 bath but share a shower. We also didn't have our own kitchen. I love my MIL to death but she can be very overbearing. I would definitely not recommend moving in with in-laws. I understand your desire for a home and the offer seems great as far as finances go but you really have to consider your relationship with your FH - It might suffer. Good luck!
februarybride
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Re: Who would live with their MIL/FMIL? LONG
I lived with my MIL for about 3 months after we got married, we were waiting to close on our house. Honestly it wasn't that bad, but I think it was because there was an end in sight. I don't think we could have lived there forever..... I think your situation is tough....it's a great opportunity -- but you have to be very careful....it may cause a strain on your relationship with your husband. Good luck!
cluelessbride
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Re: Who would live with their MIL/FMIL? LONG
Thanks everyone - we talked a lot about it this weekend and decided we were crazy to even give it a second thought. No way, we're not doing it. It may mean that we have to move out of the LI-NYC area in order to afford a home, but it's worth our sanity.
cecil
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Re: Who would live with their MIL/FMIL? LONG
I would have to see how well I got along with her, and also no matter what MAKE SURE SHE CHANGES THE NAME ON THE HOUSE! My mom and dad passed away and I have a sister, they did not have a will, so I have to buy out my sisters half of the house, it was a mess, and created a lot of tension with the both of us, but we came to an agreement and it is behind us now, but money can do strange things to people.
NuBride
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Re: Who would live with their MIL/FMIL? LONG
Good decision, cluelessbride. My response would of been ....H*** NO! don't do it, but I think you knew the answer before you even asked. Good Luck to you.
