would you 'insist' ...

ok so would you insist that your husband not attend a wedding with out you ... Ok i am having this 'argument' with one of my friends ... there really is a lot more to it but the poll would just not work ... so in general would you allow your husband to go to a wedding with out you?

ETA: ok 'allow' seems not to have been a good word ... so i switched it to say insist instead!!

hmmmm I would allow him, i am not his mother lol...but would it bother me-depends, not whether or not he is going bc if he got invited to a wedding of someone he knows and wants to go then he should go...BUT depending on who invited ONLY him, well it might bother me...if we were just dating it would be different but being that we are engaged or if we'll be married, i would wonder why i didnt get invited...If i knew they didnt invite anyone with guests or something like that then it would be different...But if others are invited with their wives and i didnt get invited yeah it would bother me. If i didnt know the person though you cant expect it.

Overall i wouldn't be mad, but it would be his decision to make, not mine.

i can't really answer this survey. . . if it was for family of course i would tell him to go and have a ball - i go to family weddings by myself all the time

if it was for friends or something i would be like eeehhh. . . something that involves drinking and people i dont know sounds fishy to me. . .

i am being honest. . .if anyone rips me i will freak out lol

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Posted by Espo22

hmmmm I would allow him, i am not his mother lol...but would it bother me-depends, not whether or not he is going bc if he got invited to a wedding of someone he knows and wants to go then he should go...BUT depending on who invited ONLY him, well it might bother me...if we were just dating it would be different but being that we are engaged or if we'll be married, i would wonder why i didnt get invited...If i knew they didnt invite anyone with guests or something like that then it would be different...But if others are invited with their wives and i didnt get invited yeah it would bother me. If i didnt know the person though you cant expect it.

Overall i wouldn't be mad, but it would be his decision to make, not mine.

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and i would say it would bother me ... so lets say hes really good friends with the guy but you just dont get along with the bride and the groom not so much so they didnt invite you ... would you really tell him he couldnt go because you werent invited ... yeah be pissed at the couple ... but me i wouldnt want to go ...

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Posted by Snowflake08

allow?? sorry but i dont like that word

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well ok ... would you argue with him and insited he not go??

honestly, if it was someone that he was friends with and i didnt like them, i wouldnt care if he went
however, if we are engaged and he was not invited with a guest, then i would prefer he didnt go

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Posted by ant n tilde

i can't really answer this survey. . . if it was for family of course i would tell him to go and have a ball - i go to family weddings by myself all the time

if it was for friends or something i would be like eeehhh. . . something that involves drinking and people i dont know sounds fishy to me. . .

i am being honest. . .if anyone rips me i will freak out lol

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i am not ripping you ... but so what if its friends ... ok how about this what if you both had weddings the same day and same time and you both wanted to go to the wedding you were invited for you both just wouldnt go to each wedding stag??

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Posted by Snowflake08

honestly, if it was someone that he was friends with and i didnt like them, i wouldnt care if he went
however, if we are engaged and he was not invited with a guest, then i would prefer he didnt go

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well i am saying your married already and he was just invited not you ... you really rather him not go ... though he wanted to go...

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Posted by blu6385

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Posted by ant n tilde

i can't really answer this survey. . . if it was for family of course i would tell him to go and have a ball - i go to family weddings by myself all the time

if it was for friends or something i would be like eeehhh. . . something that involves drinking and people i dont know sounds fishy to me. . .

i am being honest. . .if anyone rips me i will freak out lol

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i am not ripping you ... but so what if its friends ... ok how about this what if you both had weddings the same day and same time and you both wanted to go to the wedding you were invited for you both just wouldnt go to each wedding stag??

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yeah i think i would do that but thats a different circumstance there is almost no other choice. . .

ETA: i feel like he shouldnt go out of respect for me if i wasnt invited. . .thats just me though i dont know what he would actually end up doing in the end.

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Posted by kzecha

First off, I do not 'allow' my FH to do anything. He is a big boy and can make his own decisions. If it is a trust issue,then maybe you should not be together. If you cant trust him to do things on his own, that is not healthy. JMO.

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see thats what i am sayng ... i just dont see what the big deal about him attending a wedding on his own if you werent invited ... can someone who finds it a big deal for him to attend it alone please explain why?

hmmmm it is a very tough situation...If i didnt get along with the bride and the groom, well i probably wouldn't want to go to their wedding anyway...I dont like to be all fake like omg congratulations and pretend i am happy for someone if i am not, and i wouldn't be able to act all happy for someone if i am not.

Its still rude that they didn't invite the both of you if you are engaged, but if there have been problems with you and the couple before, then hmmmm a bit understandable...I probably wouldnt want someone at my wedding that i didnt get along with and had problems with before.

Now if he should or shouldn't go thats the tough part...If he is very close to his friend then i can see why he wants to go, it happens sometimes when your SO doesn't get along with your friends, but doesn't mean you dont value your friendship with the person anymore. I guess express to him how you feel and let him make the decision.

But in the end you do what you feel is right, we can all give you advice but its your relationship and you have to live with it, not us...so handle the situation how you feel best

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Posted by blu6385

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Posted by kzecha

First off, I do not 'allow' my FH to do anything. He is a big boy and can make his own decisions. If it is a trust issue,then maybe you should not be together. If you cant trust him to do things on his own, that is not healthy. JMO.

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see thats what i am sayng ... i just dont see what the big deal about him attending a wedding on his own if you werent invited ... can someone who finds it a big deal for him to attend it alone please explain why?

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like i said before, if he is invited and you arent and you are MARRIED that is being disrespectful to you, his wife. So out of respect for you I think he should not attend.

I know our relationship is different than other couples so i cant really go further than that i guess. if he asks me not to do something bc it would upset him, i basically dont do it and vice versa. . .maybe allow is the wrong word, but in the end we listen to each other's opinions and requests. . .

ANyway - what is important is that YOU arent upset by him going. I mean dont ask him not to go bc you think that you SHOULD be upset. If it truly doesnt bother you then i dont see a problem - different things bother different people

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Posted by ant n tilde

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Posted by blu6385

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Posted by kzecha

First off, I do not 'allow' my FH to do anything. He is a big boy and can make his own decisions. If it is a trust issue,then maybe you should not be together. If you cant trust him to do things on his own, that is not healthy. JMO.

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see thats what i am sayng ... i just dont see what the big deal about him attending a wedding on his own if you werent invited ... can someone who finds it a big deal for him to attend it alone please explain why?

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like i said before, if he is invited and you arent and you are MARRIED that is being disrespectful to you, his wife. So out of respect for you I think he should not attend.

I know our relationship is different than other couples so i cant really go further than that i guess. if he asks me not to do something bc it would upset him, i basically dont do it and vice versa. . .maybe allow is the wrong word, but in the end we listen to each other's opinions and requests. . .

ANyway - what is important is that YOU arent upset by him going. I mean dont ask him not to go bc you think that you SHOULD be upset. If it truly doesnt bother you then i dont see a problem - different things bother different people

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I agree, i wouldn't say NO YOU CANT GO AND THATS IT!!! i would express to him how i feel and from there he can make a decision...If he were to tell me NO YOU BETTER NOT GO!!! honestly that alone would make me want to go even more and piss me off...if he sat me down and said listen this is why it bothers me and this is how i feel then i would give it some consideration...If i saw it really upset him and he came to me and spoke to me about it in a mature matter then i would respect his feelings, just the same way i would want him to respect my feelings.