You won't believe what my mother did....

Original post by Kathy116

Aug 23, 2003 01:05 PM

I have all the Save the Date Cards...well, she came over my house, took a bunch of them, and has been sending them to people, without telling me, people I specifically said I DID NOT want at the wedding (a step-cousin who hasn't spoken to me or my family in over 15 years, more of her relatives who are so far removed that they're like 5th cousins).

I am furious, it just wasn't right for her to do this, and she knew it was wrong, that's why she 'stole' the Save The Dates and wouldn't tell me until now.

My FI has all of 10 people coming to this wedding for him (most of his family are not coming, they are soooo far away, and they're J ERKS!)
If anyone is going to add to this list, it's going to be him, he has a ton of friends that he wants to come, but originally we decided that it would just be family, because my parents wanted to keep the number down to around 130.

It's frustrating, because she keeps telling me that she's paying for the reception (just Flowefield, nothing else).,...so she has the final say!

FI and I are paying for EVERYTHING ELSE! We are spending DOUBLE what her and my father are spending. BUt in her eyes, it doesn't matter.

Kathy116 Posted: Aug 23, 2003 02:23 PM

Re: You won't believe what my mother did....

Thanks sweeite

Xelindrya Posted: Aug 23, 2003 03:21 PM

Re: You won't believe what my mother did....

You poor thing

I'd be ****ed to.

I know a lot of people are getting STDs for my wedding I specifically do not want at my wedding. I just have to hope that when they don't get a formal invite they'll get the idea.

butterfly20 Posted: Aug 23, 2003 06:43 PM

Re: You won't believe what my mother did....

kathy there are two things id probably do, one would be just let your fiance invite all his friends... your wedding ceremony is for you and your fh.......... the reception is for YOUR friends to celebrate with you..... not people you dont hang out with.....
otherwise if you dont care about inviting many people for your side.... i would say pay for the reception yourself(then you eliminate the stress of your mom holding it over your head) and send out letters to your distant relatives saying that there has been a confusion and it is a small reception and those were mistakenly sent out......
you could always ask your fiances parents for the money until after you get the wedding gifts to pay them back.....

christy Posted: Aug 23, 2003 07:12 PM

Re: You won't believe what my mother did....

Kathy116 Posted: Aug 23, 2003 07:31 PM

Re: You won't believe what my mother did....

THanks again christy!!!! FM

We wanted to also pay for the reception, but my parents wouldn't have it, they were somewhat insulted and said they want to give their daughter a proper wedding...you know, a lot of pride. Which is so very sweet that they love me so much, I'm not complaining.

I'm not sure how it's going to work out, but I will take what everyone has suggested and bring it up when we all sit down together Monday night.

Thanks again for being supportive and for all your suggestions...and sorry if I may have come across as a overly sensitive B itch, things are back into perspective and I'll keep you posted!

butterfly20 Posted: Aug 23, 2003 11:24 PM

Re: You won't believe what my mother did....

kathy you have all right to be upset...
just my opinion.... but giving a proper wedding i wouldnt consider it to be just the hall(and being most of your family)...its a generous amount but you mentioned that you are paying double of what they are on the other things...
my parents are paying a set amount which happens to cover the reception hall... then my mothers starts telling people' i decided to splurge on this and that'..... imthe one whos planning within my budget, im not asking her for any extra money, His parents are giving a set amount which is covering pretty much the rest of our expenses, yet they are just giving us the money as a gift and are not imposing any input into the wedding.(sorry. my little vent i guess)