Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

Hrm,
I’m torn.

We lived together (but not alone) before and we got married THEN planned our wedding for a year and got married again. So I’m on my second year but first after the ‘wedding’.

I want OUT! I’m thinking of the future I don’t want to live with my in-laws anymore. He is just happy right now where he is. He agrees we need our own space but he doesn’t seem too involved in making a difference. I don’t know I see the struggle there, but somehow we keep working through it.

Ask me in another few months. Tax time is our deadline for apt shopping. All this is on hold depending if I keep my job that long!

*shrug*

Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

I'd say the first year was about what we expected.

Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

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Posted by tracyg

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Posted by Irishbride

Much harder than I expected and we lived together b/4 we got married.

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that's interesting.

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Me too, I think that there are expectations on each of our sides that needed to get worked out. We are even better than we ever were before now.

Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

Yikes! The first six months have been NOT WHAT I EXPECTED!!!! We started out great. We spent a month in my parents' basement which wasn't as horrible as it sounds. Then we moved into our condo and spent a month and a half enjoying fixing it up and being young and married and then BAM! DH and went back to our night school teaching job two nights a week, DH started grad school for two of the other nights of the week and we barely got to see each other because we were either in work or school or so tired we were asleep and my MIL continues to bug us about when we are having children yet she tells me that it is my job to push DH to do well in school and at work and be THE BEST. I finally had to tell her that between work and school we have no time or energy to even practice making a baby.

The good news about our first 6 months is that we got two kittens and they seem to the best thing for DH. He can come home from the most stressful day of work and class and see our furbabies sprawled across our bed and his face softens and his eyes light up and he is a puddle of mush.

I wonder what the next 6 months will bring.

Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

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Posted by Irishbride

Much harder than I expected and we lived together b/4 we got married.

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exactly the same for me. the second year has been tons easier though. I think DH and I were together so long before the wedding that all of a sudden we were married, then the forever part hit us, and then we were faced with financially building our future together, where before all we did was plan vacations.

Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

probably easier, although it hasn't really changed all that much. we still argue over the same things and we still have a blast together!

Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

Easier. And, we didn't live together before we were married.

Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

It's only been three months but it has been a lot harder than I expected. DH and I had a long distance relationship our first 3 years, and during the last two, we only saw each other an average of 1 out of every ten days. The phone bill is much lower now, but living togeher is taking a lot of getting used to. I've learned things about him that a never new before. Good and Bad

Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

Well, now that the year mark is approaching, I have to say it has mainly been easy. We lived together beforehand so there was no adjustments after the wedding. I did have a lot of high hopes for things we wanted to accomplish in our first year, like buying a home, getting a new job and a couple other things that did not happen. But I have accepted that its not the end of the world and we have our whole lives to buy a house, and I am working my butt off to get a new job.
Our first year has been very relaxed. We have had a lot of good times since our wedding and really enjoy just being with each other whether it be sitting on the couch, laying in bed all day doing nothing or going out and doing something. We just totally enjoy being in each others company. We have a lot of things we want to accomplish and together we will get everything we both want!!

Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

I would have said that things wouldn't change much, since we lived toegther for over three years before we got marrid, but actually we're hitting a little rough spot right now. I love him to death, but we can't seem to get along right now. I'm sure it will pass, but I can tell you it's not much fun and rather unexpected.

Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

It's the same because we've lived together for 3 years. Same getting along sometimes and arguing occasionally. That's always how we are.

Re: did you think your first year of marriage was easier or harder then you expected

OUrs was about the same. We lived together for about 5 years.