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Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts
DGoldfarb0776 Posted: Apr 02, 2008 07:17 PM+
DGoldfarb0776 MEMBER SINCE: 2/07 TOTAL POSTS : 5388 WEDDING DATE: Mar 09, 2008
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Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

DH and I had this question- it might sound weird but then again we both have never been to many weddings and was wondering the following after opening our cards (DH's parents were holding them until we got back from our honeymoon) last night and we were stunned at the amounts that people gave us (both in a good and bad way)

How do some people determine how much to give the bride and groom at the wedding? We're used to giving 'even' amounts like $100.00 and $200.00

We got a few that were as low as $50.00 gift and also as high as $1,000.00- also some odd amounts like $418.00, $120.00, and also $ 180.00. Was wondering if anyone thought/thinks there is some significance in the dollar amounts or just that they pulled the amount off the top of their heads.

Also we're afraid some of the checks might bounce- what do we do in that type of situation?
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joshisgirl Posted: Apr 02, 2008 07:18 PM+
joshisgirl MEMBER SINCE: 6/07 TOTAL POSTS : 1877 WEDDING DATE: Nov 18, 2007
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

i got some weird amounts also, $60, $180, $121 ( all from couples) and i have no idea where that amount came from!
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DGoldfarb0776 Posted: Apr 02, 2008 07:26 PM+
DGoldfarb0776 MEMBER SINCE: 2/07 TOTAL POSTS : 5388 WEDDING DATE: Mar 09, 2008
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts


Posted by joshisgirl

i got some weird amounts also, $60, $180, $121 ( all from couples) and i have no idea where that amount came from!



That's why I was kinda scratching my head- one of my cousins (who was with his wife and three teenagers at the wedding) was the one that gave us the $418.00- I was like over the amount.. like they tried to figure out what we might have paid per person and tried to times it by 4 or something.
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PreshusSmurf Posted: Apr 02, 2008 07:35 PM+
PreshusSmurf MEMBER SINCE: 5/06 TOTAL POSTS : 7770 WEDDING DATE: Nov 10, 2007
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

Aren't you guys Jewish? I'm pretty sure you had a Rabbi as an officiant??

18 is the numerical equivalent of Chai in Hebrew ==> Chai = Good Luck

So that explains the $418 and the $180.

Not sure about the $120.

As for the $50, what can I say? People are cheap?

And the $1000


ETA: Jewish people will commonly give the amount they are planning + Chai ($418) ... or multiples of Chai (10 x Chai = $180)
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SusiBtoM Posted: Apr 02, 2008 07:35 PM+
SusiBtoM MEMBER SINCE: 5/07 TOTAL POSTS : 4721 WEDDING DATE: Oct 27, 2007
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

Who knows ? People do strange things at weddings.
We had a couple of 'low' gift amounts but realize that some had financial problems.
But, we did find that our friends were much more generous than DH's family. My family is only my Dad and sis, so I can't compare.
Our smallest gift was $75, and the largest was $1,000.
No odd numbers though.
Maybe that's all that was in their checking account ?
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bluegreen08 Posted: Apr 02, 2008 07:35 PM+
bluegreen08 MEMBER SINCE: 4/07 TOTAL POSTS : 8028 WEDDING DATE: Aug 17, 2008
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

sorry for crashing... the number 18 means 'chai' or good luck in the jewish religion. some people will give gifts in increments of 18 (ex: 180, 360, etc) or add 18 on to a round number (418, 118, etc). Are you Jewish or were those guests jewish?

as for the others, I don't know!
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PreshusSmurf Posted: Apr 02, 2008 07:39 PM+
PreshusSmurf MEMBER SINCE: 5/06 TOTAL POSTS : 7770 WEDDING DATE: Nov 10, 2007
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

As far as the checks you are afraid will bounce ... is there something specific that gives you that feeling???

We had 1 check that *would* have bounced, but since we have the same bank as that person, the teller actually checked it before depositing it ... and told us.

So we held onto it for a week or two, and then had them check again. When they said it would go through, we deposited it.

I'm not sure if all banks will do that though.

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Snowflake08 Posted: Apr 02, 2008 07:44 PM+
Snowflake08 MEMBER SINCE: 10/06 TOTAL POSTS : 13546 WEDDING DATE: Feb 02, 2008
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

$18 is the luckiest number for Jewish people so lots of people will either give a multiple of 18 or add an extra 18 to the amount

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PegaLega Posted: Apr 02, 2008 07:58 PM+
PegaLega MEMBER SINCE: 6/05 TOTAL POSTS : 29798 WEDDING DATE: May 25, 2007
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

Awhile ago someone had posted this question-I dont remember if we actually came to a real answer.

I know for us we always stick to somewhat even-either 100 or lets say 150 but nothing like 418

We got gifts from 100 up to 800 but all even amounts. Maybe they think certain numbers are lucky or history says they are lucky-no clue but that is the only thing I can think
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PreshusSmurf Posted: Apr 02, 2008 08:11 PM+
PreshusSmurf MEMBER SINCE: 5/06 TOTAL POSTS : 7770 WEDDING DATE: Nov 10, 2007
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts


Posted by PegaLega

Maybe they think certain numbers are lucky or history says they are lucky-no clue but that is the only thing I can think




Yep, that's exactly right!
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DGoldfarb0776 Posted: Apr 02, 2008 08:15 PM+
DGoldfarb0776 MEMBER SINCE: 2/07 TOTAL POSTS : 5388 WEDDING DATE: Mar 09, 2008
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts


Posted by PreshusSmurf

Aren't you guys were Jewish? I'm pretty sure you had a Rabbi as an officiant??

18 is the numerical equivalent of Chai in Hebrew ==> Chai = Good Luck

So that explains the $418 and the $180.

Not sure about the $120.

As for the $50, what can I say? People are cheap?

And the $1000


ETA: Jewish people will commonly give the amount they are planning + Chai ($418) ... or multiples of Chai (10 x Chai = $180)



Yes both DH and I are Jewish...
Omg I didn't remember that 18 was the equivalent of good luck... I am so dumb atm about that.

Yes I was wondering about the $50.00 ones myself- they mainly came from out of town relatives though so where they live it may not be common practice to give more than that amount of a cash gift.

As for the checks bouncing- there's one that we're not so sure of as we know they are having financial problems atm... that worries me as it's a check in a large amount $300.00.

Thanks PreshusSmurf for getting my brain going on that one! I am glad I ask some dumb questions here.
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MJDoc12 Posted: Apr 02, 2008 08:17 PM+
MJDoc12 MEMBER SINCE: 10/05 TOTAL POSTS : 12062 WEDDING DATE: Feb 25, 2007
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

well i just learned something new!!! never knew that 18 was a lucky number for jewish people.
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KRISTYRUSSELL Posted: Apr 02, 2008 08:17 PM+
KRISTYRUSSELL MEMBER SINCE: 4/06 TOTAL POSTS : 2224 WEDDING DATE: Jun 08, 2007
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

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PreshusSmurf Posted: Apr 02, 2008 08:23 PM+
PreshusSmurf MEMBER SINCE: 5/06 TOTAL POSTS : 7770 WEDDING DATE: Nov 10, 2007
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts


Posted by DGoldfarb0776

Yes both DH and I are Jewish...
Omg I didn't remember that 18 was the equivalent of good luck... I am so dumb atm about that.

Yes I was wondering about the $50.00 ones myself- they mainly came from out of town relatives though so where they live it may not be common practice to give more than that amount of a cash gift.

As for the checks bouncing- there's one that we're not so sure of as we know they are having financial problems atm... that worries me as it's a check in a large amount $300.00.

Thanks PreshusSmurf for getting my brain going on that one! I am glad I ask some dumb questions here.



I thought so!

Glad I could help clear up the confusion.

And as for the bouncing checks, I would deposit them .... why worry 'What if?' Most people don't write checks with the intention of them bouncing. Hopefully. And if they do, you'll deal with it later ...
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PreshusSmurf Posted: Apr 02, 2008 08:30 PM+
PreshusSmurf MEMBER SINCE: 5/06 TOTAL POSTS : 7770 WEDDING DATE: Nov 10, 2007
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts


Posted by MJDoc12

well i just learned something new!!! never knew that 18 was a lucky number for jewish people.



Here's more info from Wikipedia





Chai (symbol)
Chai (pronounced [xai], occasionally [hai]) is a symbol and word that figures prominently in Jewish culture and consists of the letters of the Hebrew alphabet Het and Yod.

In the Hebrew language, the word chai spelled by these two letters means 'living,' is related to the term for 'life,' chaim, and also appears in the slogan '`am yisrael chai!' ('The nation of Israel lives!', referring to all Jews).



Numerological implications
There have been various mystical numerological speculations about the fact that, according to the system of gematria, the letters of chai add up to 18 (see 'Jewish use of the Tetragrammaton' and 'Lamedvavniks'). For this reason, 18 is a lucky number in Judaism, and many Jews give gifts of money in multiples of 18 as a result.



References in culture
The Chai symbol is often worn by Jews as a medallion around the neck (along with the Star of David (Magen David) and the Hamsa).

In Hebrew, the related word chaya means living thing or animal, derived from the Hebrew word chai, meaning 'life'.

Although rare, Chai can also be used as a boy's name. Chaya, derived from chai was a popular female name in Hebrew. The name 'Chaim' is quite a common boy's name, particularly among Orthodox Jews and in Israel. Among all Jews, both religious and secular, the toast 'l´chaim', which means 'to life', is frequently used when celebrating something, such as one of the high holidays, birthdays, weddings etc. See also the article about 'Etz Chaim', meaning 'tree of life' for more related information.

Jewish poker pro Mike Matusow can usually be seen wearing a gold Chai necklace. Some non-Jews have also adopted the symbol. Former Baseball star Wade Boggs drew a Chai in the dirt before each at-bat. Elvis Presley wore a Chai necklace while performing toward the end of his life.
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Mizzdimple Posted: Apr 02, 2008 08:36 PM+
Mizzdimple MEMBER SINCE: 3/07 TOTAL POSTS : 10196 WEDDING DATE: Feb 22, 2008
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

I dont know how people determined but heres my theory, you can go either way. Someone gave us $222 - for our wedding day..so....

I mean for me I usually give 150/ person.
if its family I give more.
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DGoldfarb0776 Posted: Apr 04, 2008 07:50 PM+
DGoldfarb0776 MEMBER SINCE: 2/07 TOTAL POSTS : 5388 WEDDING DATE: Mar 09, 2008
Posted: Apr 04, 2008 07:50 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts


Posted by PreshusSmurf


Posted by MJDoc12

well i just learned something new!!! never knew that 18 was a lucky number for jewish people.



Here's more info from Wikipedia





Chai (symbol)
Chai (pronounced [xai], occasionally [hai]) is a symbol and word that figures prominently in Jewish culture and consists of the letters of the Hebrew alphabet Het and Yod.

In the Hebrew language, the word chai spelled by these two letters means 'living,' is related to the term for 'life,' chaim, and also appears in the slogan '`am yisrael chai!' ('The nation of Israel lives!', referring to all Jews).



Numerological implications
There have been various mystical numerological speculations about the fact that, according to the system of gematria, the letters of chai add up to 18 (see 'Jewish use of the Tetragrammaton' and 'Lamedvavniks'). For this reason, 18 is a lucky number in Judaism, and many Jews give gifts of money in multiples of 18 as a result.



References in culture
The Chai symbol is often worn by Jews as a medallion around the neck (along with the Star of David (Magen David) and the Hamsa).

In Hebrew, the related word chaya means living thing or animal, derived from the Hebrew word chai, meaning 'life'.

Although rare, Chai can also be used as a boy's name. Chaya, derived from chai was a popular female name in Hebrew. The name 'Chaim' is quite a common boy's name, particularly among Orthodox Jews and in Israel. Among all Jews, both religious and secular, the toast 'l´chaim', which means 'to life', is frequently used when celebrating something, such as one of the high holidays, birthdays, weddings etc. See also the article about 'Etz Chaim', meaning 'tree of life' for more related information.

Jewish poker pro Mike Matusow can usually be seen wearing a gold Chai necklace. Some non-Jews have also adopted the symbol. Former Baseball star Wade Boggs drew a Chai in the dirt before each at-bat. Elvis Presley wore a Chai necklace while performing toward the end of his life.



Go PreshusSmurf!

I don't mean to be a downer I sincerely hope that none of the checks that we got bounce-if they do I'll just have DH call if it's on his side of the family.


I had one last envelope to open that I overlooked- it had $36 cash in it- 18+18=36 so I guess it's double luck!
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Athee07 Posted: Apr 04, 2008 10:19 PM+
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

I got $101 - I just figured the lady picked up the dollar bill by accident!!!
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curiousgeorge Posted: Apr 05, 2008 01:35 AM+
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts

Smallest gift was 200$ for a couple
largest was Well....it was ALOT

We recieved a gift of 1,777
555 and 777

Not sure...but I didnt care about the numbers I was more shocked of the generosity of almost everyone at our wedding....I cried...and then cried again!!!
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DGoldfarb0776 Posted: Apr 05, 2008 04:22 PM+
DGoldfarb0776 MEMBER SINCE: 2/07 TOTAL POSTS : 5388 WEDDING DATE: Mar 09, 2008
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Re: Wedding Gift Qstion- Regarding Cash Amounts


Posted by curiousgeorge

Smallest gift was 200$ for a couple
largest was Well....it was ALOT

We recieved a gift of 1,777
555 and 777

Not sure...but I didnt care about the numbers I was more shocked of the generosity of almost everyone at our wedding....I cried...and then cried again!!!



I cried as well with certain people giving certain amounts- my great aunt (who is really a PITA) gave us $200.00 I wasn't expecting us to get that from her.

One of DH's friends who has known him since he was three years old gave us $500.00 which really truly shocked the crap out of me.

We got larger gifts than those amounts but I was like at some of them.

I just can't understand why someone gave us only $36!
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