Re: A Question for Police Wives (and anyone else who wants to answer)...
Thanks everybody!
Mrs.C, I have to say, I felt your response to me was a little condescending and judgemental.
First of all, after being together for almost 3 years now, I'm very familiar with the lingo. I even have a pair of panties that say 10-63 on them! (Cops wives will know what I mean...![]()
) When he doesn't understand me, he says, '10-5?' He's told me to 'disregard' a few times too! It's so funny because the lingo just pops out and even takes him by surprise.
He also has familiarized me with his gun (no pun intended), and I know ALL about it and I also know I have NO intention of getting excited about weapons and ammo. That's HIS area of interest and expertise and aside from maybe learning to shoot it one day, for safety reasons, I'd rather keep it at a distance.
I completely and totally respect my DHs job. He's got a ton of medals, has gotten awards, and was involved in a major shooting where he saved his partner's life. Him and his partner were resposible for the most arrests in one year at their old precinct in a very bad and dangerous neighborhood in the Bronx. He's been shot at almost daily. He's had people try to kill him while he stood on foot post by throwing bricks, air conditioners and whatever else they could find out of their windows at him. (But cops are the brutal ones, right?) I am proud of him and honored to be his wife. Thankfully he works in a different precinct now, as a Sergeant.
I know how being a cop means being a cop ALL the time. That doesn't mean I enjoy being left out of conversations, or having to smile and nod politely for hours while quietly enduring endless conversations about horrible Lieutenants and Captains, or how this one at work is a lesbian, or that one is nuts. I also find a lot of their conversations to be negative and lack compassion for others.
I've tried several times to change the subject at these functions. Sometimes, though, I don't feel it's my place to change the subject. I'm in the minority at these things, so why would they WANT to talk about something else? They're obviously enjoying themselves. At the last function someone finally asked me a personal question, and actually showed some interest. It was ... 'Are you a cop, too?' ARRRRGGHHHHH!!!![]()
And personally, I was a little offended by your suggestion that I was the boring one. I am a highly intelligent and interesting person, and can carry on a conversation about anything with anyone. If they can't talk about anything else but their jobs, it makes THEM the boring ones. Not me.
Shamee, I hear you about the control issue stuff. I was with someone in the past who was a complete control freak! OMG! I could never tolerate that! Thankfully, my DH is the total opposite. I think being a Harley man frees his spirit. Other than being a little protective and thinking I'll be in danger if I'm out past dark (LOL), he lets me be who I am and doesn't try to control me at all. We compliment each other nicely. I help free his soul a little, and show him the lighter side of life. He grounds me, and helps me to be a lot less naieve. And about the danger stuff, I just remind him that I had a life before he came along, and I managed perfectly fine to keep myself alive, thank you.![]()
I would never be able to be with a controlling man again! I was SO unhappy back then..
Thanks everybody for your responses..![]()
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Mrs.C, I have to say, I felt your response to me was a little condescending and judgemental.
First of all, after being together for almost 3 years now, I'm very familiar with the lingo. I even have a pair of panties that say 10-63 on them! (Cops wives will know what I mean...
He also has familiarized me with his gun (no pun intended), and I know ALL about it and I also know I have NO intention of getting excited about weapons and ammo. That's HIS area of interest and expertise and aside from maybe learning to shoot it one day, for safety reasons, I'd rather keep it at a distance.
I completely and totally respect my DHs job. He's got a ton of medals, has gotten awards, and was involved in a major shooting where he saved his partner's life. Him and his partner were resposible for the most arrests in one year at their old precinct in a very bad and dangerous neighborhood in the Bronx. He's been shot at almost daily. He's had people try to kill him while he stood on foot post by throwing bricks, air conditioners and whatever else they could find out of their windows at him. (But cops are the brutal ones, right?) I am proud of him and honored to be his wife. Thankfully he works in a different precinct now, as a Sergeant.
I know how being a cop means being a cop ALL the time. That doesn't mean I enjoy being left out of conversations, or having to smile and nod politely for hours while quietly enduring endless conversations about horrible Lieutenants and Captains, or how this one at work is a lesbian, or that one is nuts. I also find a lot of their conversations to be negative and lack compassion for others.
I've tried several times to change the subject at these functions. Sometimes, though, I don't feel it's my place to change the subject. I'm in the minority at these things, so why would they WANT to talk about something else? They're obviously enjoying themselves. At the last function someone finally asked me a personal question, and actually showed some interest. It was ... 'Are you a cop, too?' ARRRRGGHHHHH!!!
And personally, I was a little offended by your suggestion that I was the boring one. I am a highly intelligent and interesting person, and can carry on a conversation about anything with anyone. If they can't talk about anything else but their jobs, it makes THEM the boring ones. Not me.
Shamee, I hear you about the control issue stuff. I was with someone in the past who was a complete control freak! OMG! I could never tolerate that! Thankfully, my DH is the total opposite. I think being a Harley man frees his spirit. Other than being a little protective and thinking I'll be in danger if I'm out past dark (LOL), he lets me be who I am and doesn't try to control me at all. We compliment each other nicely. I help free his soul a little, and show him the lighter side of life. He grounds me, and helps me to be a lot less naieve. And about the danger stuff, I just remind him that I had a life before he came along, and I managed perfectly fine to keep myself alive, thank you.
Thanks everybody for your responses..
