Beside myself

Caroline i know i dont know you nor do i know your husband or anything about your marriage but from what i read in your post it sounds like he has no respect for you or your marriage and im genuinely sorry that your heart is breaking.

i would be super spitefull after i told him to pack his bags get out and meet with a lawyer i would print those pics out and give them to all his family/friends to explain why they wont be seeing much of you anymore!!!!!!

noone should ever feel the way you did! i just cant believe that hes trying to convince you that hes wearing his ring.. is he insane??

anyway im so sorry that your hurting but you deserve someone who loves you and respects you!!!

good luck!

OMG i feel terrible for you. I'm such a jealous person and if i saw my DH in that first pic i would become a raging lunatic. I don't know what the right answer is, but definitely don't let this just get brushed under the rug. He did something wrong and you deserve at the very least, the truth and an apology. We're here for you.

First, I am so sorry your heart is breaking right now. I don't know you or your husband, but from your posts, it's clear you've known for a while that this isn't working. He's not dedicated to you the way a husband should be. You deserve better. Ella deserves better. Don't stay with him just because of Ella because honestly, sometimes that's so much worse than just splitting up. If he thinks he can get away with what he did, what's to say next time he won't take it a step further?

If I were you, I'd go stay with family or friends for a while and really think about what you want to do. I'm so sorry, but we're all here to support you.

Caroline I am so mad for you right now. I can't believe not only that he's trying to convince you that he's wearing his ring, but also that you're sititng sobbing in your bedroom and he's ignoring it

I know this is easier said than done, but you need to be strong for you and for Ella and kick him to the curb. He's gone too far this time and you've put up with his cr@p for longer than you ever needed to.

I'm so sorry you're going through this right now and I imagine your heart is breaking...but you dont need put up with this anymore -- it's not fair to YOU. Be the strong woman that you are and take your gorgeous daughter and leave his sorry @ss.

SO many girls have give such great advice......I'm not going to repeat it but send you many many hugs. You have some tough decisions ahead of you

OK.. that's NOT you in the picture and there's NO ring.. W-T-F..

Caroline that is NOT ok.. I am so sorry sweetie that you are going thru this.. I wish I had better words for you..

WHAT IS HE THINKING???????????

---

Posted by What

Caroline.. i am convinced your husband is a douchebag. I need for you to tell me soething GOOD about him aside from he fathered that gorgeous little girl of yours..

YOU deserve better...
YOU are not alone... you have ella... ALWAYS... you will NEVER be alone.

but you deserve someone who doesn't cause you so much stress...

I for your strength... please hang in there.. if not for YOU, but for Ella...

I am so very sorry he's awful to you...

---

ITA! Caroline, you seem like such a wonderful person, I haven't read that much about your DH in the past, but just from this post I can tell he doesn't deserve you!! especially reading what the counselor told you guys.......you need to separate now, being around him will only empower him right now, apparently he thinks he can do whatever he wants without consequence, you can prove him wrong! just know that you are a beautiful person inside and out- you will get through this. I don't envy your situation, but you have to do what's right for you and for Ella. some prayers for you during this difficult time

I'm so pissed off for you right now. There is no ring in those pictures! How dare he act like you are the one going crazy? He has some nerve!

I agree with the other girls. Pack your stuff and get out of there (don't forget his charge card). He obviously has such a lack of respect for you and your marriage, it's deplorable. I totally do not envy your situation and I wish you all the best. You deserve so much better than to be treated like that. Hang in there!

---

Posted by hayleyandsteve

Oh Caroline, I am so sorry to hear this!!!!!

Those pictures make me so uneasy! He looks WAY too comfortable in that first picture... and I don't like the way his arm is around her! And ITA with the whole 4 girls, 4 guys in the other picture.... too big a coincidence!

I have lots of hugs for you!

What do you want to do????

---

These pics have my stomach in a knot for you!! I agree with hayley- why the fucck is his arm around her!! And NO he is not wearing a wedding band!!

You ARE SO MUCH BETTER than this!! Do not let him get away this- beyond unacceptable!! And who are these whorres anyway?? Do u know them??

I'm sooooo sorry!!

i'm so sorry you are going through this. I don't know you that well and haven't seen other rants but you've always been sweet, funny and helpful; you helped me even and I love reading your posts. You absolutely do not deserve this. I know it's a lot easier said than done, but as so many others have said you have your beautiful little girl and you deserve to be happy and be treated much better than he is treating you right now.

We are all here for you...

OMG, I cannot believe what I am reading!!!!!!

I wholeheartedly agree with what the girls have said already. I don't have much advice to offer that hasn't already been posted.

I know you said you already zoomed in to the pictures, but here's an enlarged version so he can't tell you you're imagining things

Clear as day ... no ring.

Now, I'm not going to say that my DH has NEVER left the house without his ring. He's forgotten it. He went to play hockey the other night, and he ASKED me if it was ok if he didn't wear his ring. They went to a bar after the game, and while I didn't love that he was out w/o his ring, there was no hidden agenda. (plus, he STINKS after hockey )

BUT at the bottom line of it all, the ring is just a SYMBOL of the marriage. What really matters is how he treats you, and the level of respect that he shows for you and your marriage.

The only non-negative I can see, is from the 2nd picture -- at least he isn't sitting next to one of the girls. But that doesn't mean anything. He has repeatedly done the wrong thing by you, and this one sure is a doozy!

Even my hubby is pizzzed off for ya sweetie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TELL HIM HE NEEDS TO GO SLEEP ON JOEY'S COUCH!!!!!!!!!!!

If you need someone to talk to, I am here for you. FM me ... or email me if you want, you have my email address.

I don't know what to say other than what the other girls have said. I'm sooo sorry that you are going through this. I can't even imagine how you are feeling right now. I know it won't make you feel better but, lots of : , I hope it is a big misunderstanding or something. Maybe I'm stupid but I always hope for the best. Stay Strong.

I really don't know you but I am going to give my brutally honest opinion anyway.

Pick up that gorgeous daughter of yours....pack your bag and go to a close friend or family's house for the night. When he goes to work, go home, pack his things and leave them on the front lawn. Then, change your locks and call a lawyer.

You deserve better than that....everyone does. I know you would love to stay together for your daughter, but a terrible marriage is not going to make her life better. It might even do more harm than good.

Best of luck and fm if you need.

---

Posted by PegaLega

I 100000000000% agree with Melissa, you need to tell him to get his asss OUT! Regardless, that second picture is enough for me to definitely say this was NOT a 'guys' weekend. Take Ella and leave or tell him to get his butt out.

Im sorry that you are going thru this-it is NOT something anyone wants but for the sake of your happiness and your daughters you have to take this for what it is-in your heart do you believe he is lying to you?

Dont let him make you out to be ignorant-he is NOT wearing his ring!!! Those pictures would be enough for me to beat the everliving crap out of my DH!
You and your daughter deserve to have someone in your lives to love and care for the both of you-not just be a thorn in your side!

---

I agree with both Melissa & Peggy. My heart goes out to both you & Ella, you deserve better. Please know that we are all here for you if you need to talk.

Those girls look like escorts.... the reason they are clustered together in the dinner pic is because it was likely the beginning of the night- before it was decided who would get what...... I mean, really, beside your husband- how OLD are those guys anyway? What would pretty young women want with their old wrinkly selves unless $$ was exchanged.

He will say whatever it takes to make you believe you are in the wrong. He'll likely berate you for checking his email account. He'll insist you're just 'seeing things'. You are not seeing things. Its pretty obvious this wasn't just a 'guys only weekend'.

Check his bank statements- I'll guarantee they'll tell a tale.

Please let this be the proverbial straw. You are too good for this 'man'. Take your beautiful daughter and go.

Honestly girls --- IT is WRONG OF him NOT to wear his ring. and maybe it was an accident

~However - I do think it is possible it was a guys wknd and than they met those chicks out at a rest/bar.

I have seen this time and time again esp when I go out with my girls single some not.. men will park their @sses at our table all the time b/c they think they are soo farking 'Wanted' - all's it takes is one girl in your crowed single or unhappily married to go along with the program to allow them to all sit down and chit chat ...than the drinks come and than more drinks come.. and pictures happen. Honestly I am shocked I didn't see worse cause I have seen it all from loser men prentending not to be 'married'

In any case Caroline is well aware of the issues going on in her marriage this is why she posts to us to vent. She is questioning the integrity of her DH b/c her gut is telling her to do so. It might have been a gift that this happened and she found the photos.The night even might have been inappropriate behavior of a married man, and we will never know what went on behind closed doors.


However - she did chose this person in her life for a reason and the real issue here is the bond of trust has obviously has been compromised and broken. Even if they get past this.. (which they could ) I have seen it happen, the marriage is Jeopardized, and she will always wonder about the next time. This is only something Caroline can decide upon.

I pray for strength for you I feel you will be able to make a clear decision after the storm subsides .(maybe 48hrs ) lol..

I also don't think Caroline you should just stay for Ella if that is the only reason you have been all along - that infact is a very bad reason.

Please read my FM.

wow caroline, i just really dont understand wtfff is wrong with some men these days.... they have an amazing, beautiful sweet woman and they go and do something so stupid like this.... he does not even deserve you caroline! please, who the he11 does he think he is?????? i am so mad for you hun... and those chicks are disgusting! why on earth would he choose to be with them instead of you???? ridiculous IMO....

I just caught up with this post. Im so sorry youre going through this. I cant even imagine the pain this is causing you. I truly hope you are okay. Im not even going to dog your H ( I wont type DH cause he is definitely not DEAR HUSBAND right now) because you already know where he stands amongst us women. All I will say is right now he has no respect for you or your marriage to have done something like this and then as what he did wrong. His behavior is disgusting. Deep down inside you know this man, we dont, so its your decision whether you will stay with him or not. If you decide to stay with him then his *** better think of ways to get back in your good standing because it shouldnt be easy for him. Maybe you should kick him out so he can realize what he will lose if he continues to act this way...I wish there was something any of us could say to make the pain go away but this is a tough situation. Be strong and put your foot down now. let him know you wont put up with this ever again