Beside myself

Original post by carolinebr

Jun 23, 2008 08:25 PM

Well, I am officially hysterically crying.

As many of you know, my DH is a jerk. I put up with it, well, because we have a kid. But I am at my breaking point. I think I officially hit rock bottom tonight.

He went away this past weekend with 'the guys.' He said it was just the 4 guys and no girls. Well, some girl emailed his pictures from the weekend. In every picture, he's not wearing his wedding ring. And there are girls in every picture.

I can't even see straight. I cannot stop crying. I can barely breathe. I think I am hyperventilating. I even ZOOMED IN to be sure.

There is no ring. And who the FUUCK IS THAT???

Someone talk me off the ledge please because I am out of my mind right now.

carolinebr Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:47 PM

Re: Beside myself

I have locked tghe bedroom door so I can sob in peace & he just knocked to come in. I said go away. He just asked me 'what did I do wrong?'

Toots123 Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:49 PM

Re: Beside myself

Oh no!! I am so, so incredibly sorry. There is no ring in any of those photos. Honestly, I cannot imagine what you're feeling right now. DH and I don't have a child so I cannot imagine all of the things that are going through your mind tonight . I just know that it must hurt and I am so sorry.

You don't need to make a decision right now but I think you should confront him when you catch your breath a little. Is there someone close by that can come over ?? Can you go to someone else's home if he stays home with Ella for a couple hours??? Is there someone to call??

I hope there is a reasonable explanation but I cannot imagine one that doesn't include his wedding band. Good luck!

Summer07Bride Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:50 PM

Re: Beside myself

Posted by DNicholes

Posted by Aug07OFCbride

unless you think it would help to be around him to talk about things, id probably go be with family/friend for a bit to get away and have someone caring around to be with you. can you do that?

I agree....

Well said

NinaChris07 Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:50 PM

Re: Beside myself

Posted by carolinebr

I have locked tghe bedroom door so I can sob in peace & he just knocked to come in. I said go away. He just asked me 'what did I do wrong?'

WHAT DID HE DO WRONG?! Print out that first picture and thats all he should need as an answer...

MJDoc12 Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:50 PM

Re: Beside myself

Posted by carolinebr

I have locked tghe bedroom door so I can sob in peace & he just knocked to come in. I said go away. He just asked me 'what did I do wrong?'

omg he is making ME heated--i can't imagine how you feel!!!!!

hayleyandsteve Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:51 PM

Re: Beside myself

Oh Caroline, I am so sorry to hear this!!!!!

Those pictures make me so uneasy! He looks WAY too comfortable in that first picture... and I don't like the way his arm is around her! And ITA with the whole 4 girls, 4 guys in the other picture.... too big a coincidence!

I have lots of hugs for you!

What do you want to do????

carolinebr Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:52 PM

Re: Beside myself

I need to go for a walk & Catch my breath. If I'm dead in the morning, know that he pulled an Enthwistle

PegaLega Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:53 PM

Re: Beside myself

I 100000000000% agree with Melissa, you need to tell him to get his asss OUT! Regardless, that second picture is enough for me to definitely say this was NOT a 'guys' weekend. Take Ella and leave or tell him to get his butt out.

Im sorry that you are going thru this-it is NOT something anyone wants but for the sake of your happiness and your daughters you have to take this for what it is-in your heart do you believe he is lying to you?

Dont let him make you out to be ignorant-he is NOT wearing his ring!!! Those pictures would be enough for me to beat the everliving crap out of my DH!
You and your daughter deserve to have someone in your lives to love and care for the both of you-not just be a thorn in your side!

GettinHutched Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:54 PM

Re: Beside myself

ugggh Caroline my heart breaks for you.... We're all here for you!!!!

Colette Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:55 PM

Re: Beside myself

Jesus Christ, he's so outta line here.
Caroline do you know the other guys he was with? Are they married? I don't know, I'd be emailing those pics to their wives/SOs in a heartbeat. But that's me.

I think the really upsetting thing here is this isn't an isolated event, he just seems to be so cold sometimes with you, he's really got ISSUES. If you don't have it in you to talk to him tonight, that's FINE, let him sweat it out until YOU are ready to talk.

davenjess Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:56 PM

Re: Beside myself

please let us know when you are back from your walk....

soon2bmrsVPT Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:56 PM

Re: Beside myself

1. tell him to take his pictures and get out
2. take care of you and your daughter
3. meet with a lawyer

you said it best yourself ..... this is a 'deal breaker'. I think for a long time you have been avoiding what your gut is telling you.

I know it seems impossible... you have to stand up for yourself and be strong. You know you can do what you *have to do* for you and Ella

NinaChris07 Posted: Jun 23, 2008 08:59 PM

Re: Beside myself

Posted by soon2bmrsVPT

1. tell him to take his pictures and get out
2. take care of you and your daughter
3. meet with a lawyer

you said it best yourself ..... this is a 'deal breaker'. I think for a long time you have been avoiding what your gut is telling you.

I know it seems impossible... you have to stand up for yourself and be strong. You know you can do what you *have to do* for you and Ella

I totally agree with this... although OBVIOUSLY easier said than done - the one thing I would say is if you decide to go this route - you dont have to leave your home with your baby, you tell HIM to go leave and find a friend's basement...

soon2bmrsVPT Posted: Jun 23, 2008 09:01 PM

Re: Beside myself

Posted by carolinebr

I need to go for a walk & Catch my breath. If I'm dead in the morning, know that he pulled an Enthwistle

This may be a joke, somehow, but it is rather frightening.. please just get away. He has no remorse & doesn't care.

everyone of your DH 'vents' gets me heated because he seems to have an apparent lack of respect for your marriage.. Please, do something for YOU for once!!!!

PegaLega Posted: Jun 23, 2008 09:04 PM

Re: Beside myself

Posted by soon2bmrsVPT

Posted by carolinebr

I need to go for a walk & Catch my breath. If I'm dead in the morning, know that he pulled an Enthwistle

This may be a joke, somehow, but it is rather frightening.. please just get away. He has no remorse & doesn't care.

everyone of your DH 'vents' gets me heated because he seems to have an apparent lack of respect for your marriage.. Please, do something for YOU for once!!!!

Caroline seriously, the vents and frustrations with your husband are a given-we all have them-but there have been SO many times that you have let it go and forgiven him-dont do it again, otherwise who knows what will happen next. It seems like its getting WORSE way faster then its getting better....dont give him the option to make a fool out of YOU

What Posted: Jun 23, 2008 09:05 PM

Re: Beside myself

Caroline.. i am convinced your husband is a douchebag. I need for you to tell me soething GOOD about him aside from he fathered that gorgeous little girl of yours..

YOU deserve better...
YOU are not alone... you have ella... ALWAYS... you will NEVER be alone.

but you deserve someone who doesn't cause you so much stress...

I for your strength... please hang in there.. if not for YOU, but for Ella...

I am so very sorry he's awful to you...

Jaysgirl119 Posted: Jun 23, 2008 09:06 PM

Re: Beside myself

I am so sorry to hear!

soon2bmrsVPT Posted: Jun 23, 2008 09:07 PM

Re: Beside myself

Posted by PegaLega

Caroline seriously, the vents and frustrations with your husband are a given-we all have them-but there have been SO many times that you have let it go and forgiven him-dont do it again, otherwise who knows what will happen next. It seems like its getting WORSE way faster then its getting better....dont give him the option to make a fool out of YOU

I was JUST thinking the same thing... Please do not let this be another 'misunderstanding'.. If you don't take a stand now, it will only continue.. He is walking all over you right now.