FH's parents want to stand up with us during our ceremony. I only want FH and I up there with the Rabbi
How can i tell them nicely they have to sit in their seats?
anyone else going through this?
Randilotus
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
Really is that some type of tradition, I have never heard of the parents standing? I don't think you are wrong to feel this way!
TheFutureMrsM
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
Posted by Randilotus
Really is that some type of tradition, I have never heard of the parents standing? I don't think you are wrong to feel this way!
its so weird, i have been to alot of weddings and have never seen this. My parents are defin not standing up there with me. So i think its just so weird having them up there staring at us the entire time. I am going to be so nervous as it is
sweetdoublenn
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
I never heard of Parents standing. I think it should be just you, your FH, and the Rabbi!
Wifeynella
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
ive been to a few interfaith ceremonies and i've never seen that!!
you should have your FH tell them that he wants your ceremony only about you and he. that should work
TheFutureMrsM
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
Posted by BklynBride2Be
ive been to a few interfaith ceremonies and i've never seen that!!
you should have your FH tell them that he wants your ceremony only about you and he. that should work
This was brought up tonite and they were very insistent on standing up there with us...i am really upset about this and cant sleep
Espo22
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
well ive been to a jewish ceremony, actually the couple was interfaith...the bride was jewish and the groom was catholic. And both parents were standing at the altar but at the side by like where the bp would normally stand.
You're definitely not being a bridezilla. It's totally a matter of personal preference, and if you don't want anyone else up there, then that's your choice. However, I would first check with the Rabbi... I did not want any of the parents under the Chuppah with us either - I told them all that they could sit after walking us down the aisle, but 5 minutes before the ceremony, my Rabbi told them where they would be standing. I wasn't thrilled at all, but honestly, in the end it was kinda nice looking at pictures and seeing our parents smiling at us. Ok, so I digress...anyways, I would be honest with your future in-laws (or semi-honest!), tell them that between you and your fh, the Rabbi and your bridal party, there's going to be way too many people up there. Also point out that they'll have a much better view of you guys from their seats!
I hope everything works out...I know how difficult in-laws can be!! Good luck!!
And btw, your dress is stunning!!
bluegreen08
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
It really is Jewish tradition for the parents (both sides) to stand up there -- not right on top of you but at the sides of the Chuppah. FH wasn't crazy about that at first but he decided he's OK with it because it's a big part of tradition
in the end it's what you guys want, but I just wanted to comment that it's not something random your FH's parents made up to smother you
PreshusSmurf
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
It is a Jewish tradition to have the family under the Chuppah with the Bride and Groom.
We had both sets of parents standing with us during our interfaith ceremony ... it was actually something that I (the Jewish one) really wanted, and my DH (the Catholic one) went along with.
In addition to the parents, we also had the whole Bridal Party standing as well ... off to the sides.
bluegreen08
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
Posted by PreshusSmurf
It is a Jewish tradition to have the family under the Chuppah with the Bride and Groom.
We had both sets of parents standing with us during our interfaith ceremony ... it was actually something that I (the Jewish one) really wanted, and my DH (the Catholic one) went along with.
In addition to the parents, we also had the whole Bridal Party standing as well ... off to the sides.
we're interfaith too and we're doing it exactly the same way
Espo22
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
yeah i don't think it should bother you nicole because regardless you would have people up there with you, we all will because we'll have our bridal party by our side.
MrsD71208
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
I see that this stinks for you to decide, but what does Lee say? I wouldn't want parents up there, period. My MOH is the only one that will be by my side...my BP will be seated in the first row of the church, right by my parents. I don't see why parents need to hold your hand up there....I am with you and would talk to Lee about it...he is understandinag.
mRm2008
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
Posted by Randilotus
Really is that some type of tradition, I have never heard of the parents standing? I don't think you are wrong to feel this way!
yes, me either about them standing with you?!?! for the whole ceremony or just a certain part of it?? i would want them in their seats as well, i would discuss w/ your officiant maybe he could speak to them about that
xXxNovember08xXx
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
Posted by PreshusSmurf
It is a Jewish tradition to have the family under the Chuppah with the Bride and Groom.
We had both sets of parents standing with us during our interfaith ceremony ... it was actually something that I (the Jewish one) really wanted, and my DH (the Catholic one) went along with.
In addition to the parents, we also had the whole Bridal Party standing as well ... off to the sides.
ditto.
it is a jewish tradition and part of the jewesh ceremony for the parents to be there with you.
explain to yoru FH the difference and see waht he says...
sometimes it is VERY difficult to break tradition, and it may not be soemthign that will easily be pushed aside.
Soon2BDoubleL
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
It is Jewish tradition for the parents to be up with the bride and groom. I think it's beautiful, b/c it shows the love of both families.
Snick n Nick
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
Posted by bluegreen08
It really is Jewish tradition for the parents (both sides) to stand up there -- not right on top of you but at the sides of the Chuppah. FH wasn't crazy about that at first but he decided he's OK with it because it's a big part of tradition
in the end it's what you guys want, but I just wanted to comment that it's not something random your FH's parents made up to smother you
Yeah, that's what I thought....I saw pics from my Jewish friend's wedding and it was kind of nice seeing the parents there beaming at them....but I think you'd have to have both sets of parents or neither, or it would be weird.
MrsK2008
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
I would say no........
some parents are just OVER involved
zoe282
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
I don't care if it's tradition personally. If it bothers you, you should try to change it. I don't think it's right to have his parents up there and not yours. I think it should be about you and FH up there. If you don't mind then go for it, but since it is an interfaith ceremony then there should be some lienency on the matter.
sassygirl9
Posted:
Member since
Re: Am I being a Bridezilla???
I've been to a jewish wedding and both parents are up there, not next to them, but to the side. I'm pretty sure thats what they mean. I mean it is his parents not like random people, so it's hard to tell them no. They might also see as a sign of disrespect for their tradition or religion. Honestly, I didn't even pay attn. to the parents while they were up there, the focus is all on the bride and groom. Maybe durin gthe rehearsal you make sure they're up there, but at a distance
