How many brides out there are keeping thier last names when they get married? I've had my name for almost 22 years and I don't feel the need to give it up. FH is not thrilled, but he knows that there's no way I'd ever give up my name, especially for a misogynistic tradition. Are any of you keeping your last name? How does FH feel? Have you discussed what last name your kids will take? How will you let people know? We were thinking of putting in a little card in the invitation like an 'at home' card that clearly says 'Mr. Groom Groomsname and Mrs. bride Bridesname will be at home at..' or just 'After the wedding, the couple will be known as 'Mr Groom Groomsname and Mrs. Bride Bridesname?' What do you think? What kinds of challenges are you facing?
SReidy
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Re: Any bride keeping her name?
I'm hyphenating. This way we'll still be 'MR. & Mrs. _____________' but I still get my name too- it's the best of both worlds.
xjulietx
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Re: Any bride keeping her name?
I am planning of hyphenating. I want my name. I am 27 1/2 years old. It is part of me.
marymoon
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Re: Any bride keeping her name?
Is HE hyphenating also? I'm all about equality. I'd be thrilled to hyphenate if we were both doing it.
NYCHICK
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I am hyphenating, and he isn't.
ETA - I have never heard of a groom hyphenating.
SReidy
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Posted by NYCHICK
I am hyphenating, and he isn't.
Me too.
shawl
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Re: Any bride keeping her name?
Definitely keeping my name - he is welcome to change his if he likes!
brideinapril
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I am taking my fi last name, I am glad to be rid of mine.
tourist
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I voted I don't know.
I think we should both pick a neutral one. I told him I won't change mine , b/c his family won't agree on how to prounouce his, and one of the ways (probably the correct way) sounds silly with my name. I don't know how to tell people though, so they don't right checks out that way.
marymoon
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Re: Any bride keeping her name?
The checks thing is important. It's customary in some aprts of the country (though I've never seen it done) to have cards that say 'mr and mrs so and so will be at home on Dec 15,...' and it gives the address, so I think something like that would be the easiest, and insert in the invite.
FeliciaDA
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Re: Any bride keeping her name?
My last name is TOO long (heck, I'm Italian) and his isn't much shorter.. so hyphenation is just not practical.
I used to swear I'd never give up my name if I got married, but ever since the day I met FH (and knew in my heart I'd marry him) I started calling myself Mrs. P. Not sure why, it just seemed like it 'fit.'
Oldfashioned, yes it is to a degree. But I just love the thought of being Mrs P. , and actually look forward to the day when I can officially call myself that.
nsgraham
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Re: Any bride keeping her name?
I went back and forth on this one. I decided to hypenate - not for him at all - he doesn't want me to, but because we've decided that the kids will have his name and I want to have the same name as my kids for use in situations with them. I don't quite know if I'm legally changing it or just gonna use his name when I feel like it. So many women in my family don't have the same last name as their kids.
But for my writing and my work, I'm keeping my maiden. And it's not moving to middle name status either - i have a perfectly fine middle name.
I really don't like the idea of 'Mrs.' - why do women have to indicate their married status to the world when men don't? I like a family having one name though, so we picked his.
Lorena
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Re: Any bride keeping her name?
I voted 'Yes! I think it's totally romantic and makes us a family' but it really isn't about being romantic for me. It is more because I like the idea that some day our kids will have the same last name as us both. I don't think it's a terrible thing if kids don't, or anything like that, it's just my preference. I may not change my last name at work, just for convenience sake, but we'll see. I definitely am not taking his name out of some kind of 'misogynistic tradition' though. I don't see it that way at all. Actually, if I thought he or his family saw it that way I probably wouldn't be with him!
MCDO15
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FW is glad to join the family name and drop her name. There was no question about it...
I'm excited...it shows we are 1
JZNCK
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I'm taking his.. I can't wait to change my LAST NAME!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL
SteffieSunshine1
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I will be keeping my name because I have built a great reputation within my company & I don't want to just disappear there. I've seen it happen.
I wanted to hyphenate, but it doesn't sound right. FH is not thrilled, but we agreed the kids will have his last name & should I ever leave my company for some reason...I'll take his name at that time.
bxgell2
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Re: Any bride keeping her name?
I was thinking of not taking his last name, not because I'm particularly attached to mine, but because he has an absolutely AWFUL last name... 'Beer' ... no joke. But, I think I'm just going to hyphenate it with mine, just so I have the same last name as my children
I think that professionally I may use my maiden name if I have a full time permanent teaching posistion at the time of my wedding, if not than I will just take his. It is hard I remember being in HS and newly married teachers being snippy about learning their new name but half way through the year when you are used to saying one thing it is hard to switch. Maybe I'll finsih off the year with my name and the following year have the 'new' stdudents call me my new name.
sag530
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Re: Any bride keeping her name?
For a while I was thinking I would keep my name professionally, but then decided it would be too difficult. Now I've decided to change my name completely. For me, it shows FH I am totaly committed and confident our marriage is forever.
Jordan
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Re: Any bride keeping her name?
I'm not changing my name nor am I hyphenating - our names are too long and sound similar.
I don't think this makes us any less comitted or any less of a family. I know plenty of women who changed their name for the sake of family...and are now divorced. I think a marriage is more than just having the same name. But, that's JMO.
Posted by nsgraham
I really don't like the idea of 'Mrs.' - why do women have to indicate their married status to the world when men don't?
