You need to leave him...Thats not the way you deserve to live the rest of your life...You need to leave him and the sooner the better. You deserve to be someone's partner, not someone's maid...
Good luck and keep strong!!
Jennmolloy
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Re: Calling off engagment
This is no way for you to spend your live.
To be as blunt as Gina you should leave him!!!
You deserve so much more than someone who needs that kind of 'attention' and what happens when the attention is not enough and he decides to cheat on you when you are home with the kids. So not worth it.
aseltzer
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Re: Calling off engagment
Get out now. Leopards do not change their spots. Be strong. Otherwise your life will always be filled with these same issues. Life is hard enough, you will find someone who is wonderful and treats you right. When someone cheats on you once, shame on them, cheats on you again, shame on you. Move on. You are not a slave or a maid. Good luck.
ELluvsMB
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Member since
Re: Calling off engagment
This is horrible and he is not treating you the way you should be treated. It's so hard to move on especially when you've spent so much time invested in the relationship but it doesn't sound like he's as dedicated to it as you are. Coming from someone who's sister is getting a divorce, get out while you still can. Things weren't perfect for my sister even before she got married and she still went through with it because the though of starting over killed her. It was the biggest mistake. I feel so terrible for you but in all honestly I would break it off, give yourself time to recover from it. It's going to be hard but in the end you will see that it was a good decision.
Kimbalina
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Re: Calling off engagment
he sounds like he wants a maid or a MOM to take care of things.. and wants to be a bachelor and date aka SCREW around..
See him for what he is a LOSER and move on. I know that it is rough because there is love there, but you are better off.
Im a Pepper
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Re: Calling off engagment
I'm so sorry I think you know what needs to be done. You deserve so much better.
grrulz
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Re: Calling off engagment
Posted by stinenandy2010
If he hurt you once, he will do it again. You deserve better and you will find someone that will treat you like you deserve. I would call off the wedding b/c you don't want to enter a marriage like this. A key element of marriage is trust, and it doesn't seem like you have this. I know its hard to do, but you have to put YOURSELF first. It will be tough, but your friends and family will be there to support you.
i couldn't agree with this more once they do it once they'll do it again! he seems like he needs to fix his own issues...good luck girl
KerriJohnS
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Re: Calling off engagment
Dump his a$$ and pawn the ring for money. That's the best move you can make. If you don't ever get rid of him, he won't ever change and you will just be a glutten for punishment.
MrsBtobe2009
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Re: Calling off engagment
I agree with all the other girls.....You need to get out. At least you found out this before you are married with kids. You DO NOT deserve to be treated this way and should not tolerate it. They dont change. No matter how much they may say it. I am so sorry you are going through this but we are all here if you need anything.
JenBill61210
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Re: Calling off engagment
sorry to hear.... but glad to see you are putting yourself first. you will be much happier than if you stayed in a bad marriage! you are doing the right thing. good luck and my thoughts are with you
BeLissa
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Re: Calling off engagment
he sounds like a manipulative creep and you definitely need to get out. He wont change (and you shouldnt settle for being with someone you want to change anyway, or have to put forth the energy to change him), if anything it will only get worse. Be strong and just MOVE ON.
NYYankeeGirl72
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Re: Calling off engagment
I know exactly what you are going through. For four years, I spent my life with a guy, who treated me exactly the way you are being treated. The times I wanted to leave he would beg, plead and tell me he loves me above all. But just saying that he loves you doesn't mean he really does. He would say he loves me just to get him back in my good graces.....then he would then act up again.
The day I decided to leave him, he begged he pleaded, he even wrote letters to me saying how sorry he was and how much he loved me. But I had had enough!!! Deep down inside I knew that he really didn't love me, coz if he did he would have never mistreated and disrespected me the way he did.
You deserve better than that. A true man who loves you would never hurt you. And don't feel guilty about leaving him. He did you wrong. Remember that!!!
All you have done has been there for him and all he did was hurt you. You need to take care of you. And be sure to inform your family and friends of the situation. You will need their support and guidance, too.
Good Luck!! And if you need to chit chat some more you can always FM me.
JillandJoe
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Re: Calling off engagment
im so sorry you are going through this... but i think you need to leave. You deserve better then that. Go with your gut!
FutureMrsC614
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Re: Calling off engagment
Why are you even second guessing yourself???? NO ONE would want to be with the person you're describing, so it should be an easy decision. PACK IT UP GIRL! and sell the ring :O)
mcbride62009
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Re: Calling off engagment
II am so very sorry to hear this. I don't know you but I am sure you deserve better. You don't want to be married and find out its happening again. Well whatever you decied worry about yourself and no one else. Be strong!
Kimmypie143
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Re: Calling off engagment
Im so sorry. But you just need to walk away from that. You deserve more then he can ever give you! Just walk away and don't look back. Don't let him con you into the face he will change bc you know he wont. Im sorry you have to go through this but I know how that can be. It hurts so bad but its better you do it now rather then in 2 years or 10 years when it is worse. Your prince is out there waiting for you! and You will find him one day!
MrsJuneB2B
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Re: Calling off engagment
first of all, secondly, i'm sorry that you're going through this now... BUT... i honestly think you need to get out now! you deserve SO much more than that. i don't know you, but i know that no one deserves to be made to feel so badly. you need to call it off, stay away from him and move on with your life, knowing that you know what you're worth and that you can be proud that you did the right thing. no matter what he says, honestly, his conduct proves he can't be trusted. and you are worth the sun, moon and stars. repeat that to yourself everyday and believe it.
i'll be thinking good thoughts for you!
yelley77
Posted:
Member since
Re: Calling off engagment
first of all, for you.
Second of all, things don't change. He's proven that to you by the constant lying and going behind your back. You, my dear, should be your number one priority. The fact that you are questioning marrying this man is a good sign that you are not ready. Can you marry him in the future? perhaps. Can he change? there is always a possibility. but to marry him, or to promise to marry him when you are clearyly not happy is not the answer. If you want to work things out with him, you need to forget about the marriage part and start from square one again. But my advise is this... without trust, you have nothing since trust is the foundation of ALL relationships. So if you can't trust him, IMO, there is nothing to base the new start on.
good luck and lots of hugs for you.
Celeste617
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Re: Calling off engagment
So sorry to hear this But better to have realized this now than later. As someone that has once been in an unhealthy relationship, I can honestly say that as tough as it may be to leave, you HAVE to - for your own sake. Don't stay in a bad situation just because. It only gets worse. Good luck
QUIA
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Re: Calling off engagment
Posted by BeLissa
he sounds like a manipulative creep and you definitely need to get out. He wont change (and you shouldnt settle for being with someone you want to change anyway, or have to put forth the energy to change him), if anything it will only get worse. Be strong and just MOVE ON.
ITA!!!!
You need to move on and move on fast! He tells you what you want to hear when you need to.. and you constantly just ok.. I believe you.. he knows your not strong to leave .. and thats why he keeps doing it.. You are telling us of two incidents but Im sure there are a million more you dont know about.. Do yourself a favor.. move on .. and quick.. the situation is going to get worse..