I went looking at gowns yesterday, and I LOVED one. The issue is that it's a discontinued style. I tried on the sample and it was a bit snug but it zipped and the seamstress there said that they could make it work if they let out ALL the seems but that would cost a fortune to do. If I bought the sample and waited a few months and tried it on again after losing some weight, and they didnt have to open all the seams the alterations would be capped at $295.
I decided it seemed worth it, so I called my Mom and had her meet me at the shop to see the gown. She said it was a gorgeous gown, but also said i looked fat. She does this with every gown I've loved so far. I tried explaining to her, that I am NOT a small girl, and white does not help in the slimming department. I'm not going to look small in any big white gown i put on, but I didnt feel huge in this gown.
I loved it, but didnt love how she made me feel in it... so I didnt get it. I spent a good portion of last night moping because of this... and I had wedding nightmares because of it.
I don't know what to do. The shop isnt open again till Tuesday.... I don't even know the style number.
___________________ UPDATE!! So Ashley from the shop just called me!! She told me the style number, and said not to worry she doesnt think it'll get sold. It's not an ugly dress or anything, its just not a popular style. If any of you could try to find pictures of this gown for me, i'll be your best friend! Impressions Style # 2716
thanks so much!!
Snowflake08
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Re: Dress related Vent
ok first of all, i am sorry that your mother is not being very supportive
i looked at your photos of the gowns you've tried on and you do NOT look fat!!! i think the first one looks very flattering on you
what you need to do is to tell your mother that you dont appreciate it when she says those things; that you appreciate her honesty, but im sure there is a better way to tell you
if you loved the gown and it zipped, id go for it!!
bemyyoko
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Re: Dress related Vent
Posted by Snowflake08
ok first of all, i am sorry that your mother is not being very supportive
i looked at your photos of the gowns you've tried on and you do NOT look fat!!! i think the first one looks very flattering on you
what you need to do is to tell your mother that you dont appreciate it when she says those things; that you appreciate her honesty, but im sure there is a better way to tell you
if you loved the gown and it zipped, id go for it!!
thank you! you're sweet. i used to be tiny, and then i gained a ton of weight and i was huge. i've since lost almost 30lbs so while i'm not thrilled with how i look, i'm not miserable about it you know? I think my mom just has trouble not picturing me as a 17 year old version of myself.
I figured the same thing, it zipped! So since I have till March, 10lbs is totally doable, and i don't think i'd need to lose much more to get it to fit comfortably. I'll call them first thing on Tuesday. Cross your fingers for me that it's still there!
DLM107
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Re: Dress related Vent
Mothers always have a way of making us feel worse than we already feel I would wait until Tues. to get the model number and then call around to other shops. In my opinion. . .I would keep looking b/c I think you'll find a dress that you will feel your best in regardless of your size. I hate my size and it was tough looking for dresses but after trying on loads of dresses I finally found one that I think flatters me. If you need any help calling shops FM and I'll help.
Espo22
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Re: Dress related Vent
If you loved it then go for it.
And sorry your mom is being like this but uhmmm maybe you shouldn't invite her to go dress shopping anymore, go alone and buy it on your own and then after tell her. It's not worth it
Melissa313
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Re: Dress related Vent
my mom is the same way... thats why she hasnt even seen the dress i picked out in person yet. IMO its your wedding, not hers and if you love the dress, thats all that matters. If the dress zipped it shouldnt be too hard to lose enough weight for it to be perfect
DLM107
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I just looked at the other dresses you've tried on and I LOVE the first dress you tried on. It is beautiful and looks really nice on you.
bemyyoko
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Posted by Espo22
If you loved it then go for it.
And sorry your mom is being like this but uhmmm maybe you shouldn't invite her to go dress shopping anymore, go alone and buy it on your own and then after tell her. It's not worth it
You're right. I hadnt gone with her in a while because whenever she went I ended up crying, I don't know if it was because of her saying something, or if it's just the pressure of wanting my mom to love my gown... but I always cried. So I didnt go with her yesterday, found this gown, called her, and when I said I was going to buy it, she got mad because she wanted to see it. I felt bad so I told her to come look at it so I could buy it. Apparently, that wasnt the best idea I've had.
My mom is awesome, she doesnt TRY to hurt my feelings, and she doesnt say things to be mean, she just doesn't realize the affect her words have on me i guess.
You're right though, feeling guilty for a little while might be better than not getting a gown that I love.
bemyyoko
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Posted by DLM107
I just looked at the other dresses you've tried on and I LOVE the first dress you tried on. It is beautiful and looks really nice on you.
Thanks so much! I loved that gown, but the way it breaks up at the bottom makes me look super short. This is gonna sound silly, but since i'm so short all my clothes gather like the pickups do in wedding gowns, and I've always hated it because my mom or my brothers would pick on me for it. (they are tall, they don't understand ) So I feel like the gathers or pickups on wedding gowns just make me look even shorter.
bensgirl
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Re: Dress related Vent
hi. i don't post all that often, but your post hit really close to home! i'm sorry that your mom isn't being supportive and i know how it feels. i am also not a small girl and i had tons of fear about 'the dress' i just found one last week and even though i'm not a supermodel in it, i know it's my dress! if you feel that way about your dress and it zips, you should go for it!! this is YOUR day and what matters most is how you feel. you look great in the pics in your album so don't worry about what your mother says. i was thin too when i was 17, but then life (and our bodies) change...as my fiance would say...'it is what it is' lol! :)
go get the dress! post some pics when you get a chance....i'd love to see!
bemyyoko
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Re: Dress related Vent
Posted by bensgirl
hi. i don't post all that often, but your post hit really close to home! i'm sorry that your mom isn't being supportive and i know how it feels. i am also not a small girl and i had tons of fear about 'the dress' i just found one last week and even though i'm not a supermodel in it, i know it's my dress! if you feel that way about your dress and it zips, you should go for it!! this is YOUR day and what matters most is how you feel. you look great in the pics in your album so don't worry about what your mother says. i was thin too when i was 17, but then life (and our bodies) change...as my fiance would say...'it is what it is' lol! :)
go get the dress! post some pics when you get a chance....i'd love to see!
Thanks for your comment. It's nice to know I'm not the only one who feels/felt this way.
I love your ring! It's very similar to mine hehe.
chrispar
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Re: Dress related Vent
I am so sorry to hear what your mom said to you. I really think you need to go with how you feel and screw everyone else's opinions. If you love the gown and are happy in it then go for it. This is YOUR day not your moms and I think she's being selfish and unsupportive. Don't mope around because of what she said to you because obviously it's a control thing on her part. Smile, your will look beautiful!!!!!
Espo22
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Re: Dress related Vent
Posted by bemyyoko
Posted by Espo22
If you loved it then go for it.
And sorry your mom is being like this but uhmmm maybe you shouldn't invite her to go dress shopping anymore, go alone and buy it on your own and then after tell her. It's not worth it
You're right. I hadnt gone with her in a while because whenever she went I ended up crying, I don't know if it was because of her saying something, or if it's just the pressure of wanting my mom to love my gown... but I always cried. So I didnt go with her yesterday, found this gown, called her, and when I said I was going to buy it, she got mad because she wanted to see it. I felt bad so I told her to come look at it so I could buy it. Apparently, that wasnt the best idea I've had.
My mom is awesome, she doesnt TRY to hurt my feelings, and she doesnt say things to be mean, she just doesn't realize the affect her words have on me i guess.
You're right though, feeling guilty for a little while might be better than not getting a gown that I love.
well maybe then talk to her, tell her if she can think before she speaks...you're already stressed enough with the wedding and the whole process of buying a dress and that you need some support from now.
JACK808
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If you feel comfortable and beautiful in the dress, then that is all that matters!
bemyyoko
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Posted by JACK808
If you feel comfortable and beautiful in the dress, then that is all that matters!
thanks!
bemyyoko
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Posted by chrispar
I am so sorry to hear what your mom said to you. I really think you need to go with how you feel and screw everyone else's opinions. If you love the gown and are happy in it then go for it. This is YOUR day not your moms and I think she's being selfish and unsupportive. Don't mope around because of what she said to you because obviously it's a control thing on her part. Smile, your will look beautiful!!!!!
thank you!
Fall Bride 2008
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Re: Dress related Vent
if thats the dress you love then go for it however i have this thing that you should get your dress to fit you now god forbid of anything. I am sorry your mom made you feel bad
angl2001
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take a look on maggiesottero.com maybe you can find it there, They go by name on her site. hope that helps.
so sorry you felt like that if you need to talk FM me! or IM me
bemyyoko
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Re: Dress related Vent
Posted by angl2001
take a look on maggiesottero.com maybe you can find it there, They go by name on her site. hope that helps.
so sorry you felt like that if you need to talk FM me! or IM me
It's an Impressions gown that I found a while ago online, but now I can't find it. I had fallen in love with it online, but no one had it... now i find out it's b/c it's discontinued.
bemyyoko
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Re: Dress related Vent
Posted by Fall Bride 2008
if thats the dress you love then go for it however i have this thing that you should get your dress to fit you now god forbid of anything. I am sorry your mom made you feel bad
I totally know what you mean. That was part of the hesitation, but if they let the seams out, it'd fit right now just fine. Losing the ten pounds is more of a money saver than anything else.