I almost went to jail today!!

AHHHH!!!

So, I went to the school bookstore to buy FH his books for small semester. I saw the funniest bright blue pants that said 'QUEENS' on the butt. Of course, I had to have them for working out / sleeping. I had to go back to the rack and get a pair with a tag on it, fine whatever. Just pack the bag so I can go.
I go to walk out the door and I hear 'beep beep beep'. Well, this really intelligent individual comes over and asks to seek my receipt..so I give it to him. Well, there were two pairs of pant in my bag and being a moron I said, 'I only bought one pair, take your pants and I will be on my way.' So the man starts yelling at me and telling me to settle down...this goes on and on. He yells accross the store that I tried to shoplift a pair of Large sweatpants. Oh no, he didn't!!! I start screaming...oh yes, my exact words, 'Did you call me fat? Do I look like I wear a large?'
By this point, there were 5 of these morons blocking me from getting out of the store. I am yelling many a nice words still stuck on the fact that this man inferred I was fat.

I called my attorney and threatened to sue them for keeping me there against my will and harrassment...so they decided to let me go! Can you believe he called me fat??? Call me a thief, okay. Tell me I have bad hair, okay. BUT don't ever call me fat!!