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MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party

OctGroom Posted:

MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party

Background info --

One of my CLOSEST friends got married last year.. He's been a friend of mine since 1987. His wife is a sweetheart of a girl.

For his bachelor party, his new bride came along. Everybody was invited. It was a combo thing. (In other words.. you could bring your SO. It wasn't just the boys.)

It was a VERY fun & good day..

BUT>>>

The reason for the combo thing was that his FW didn't want him to go to a strip club. She felt that bcause he was going to be her husband --> why would he want to look at other women? (There's some validity to that).

NOW.. my bachelor party is coming up...

I told my Best Man.. plan whatever you guys want to do.. I don't care. I'll have fun just being with you. I'm up for anything.

MY FW doesn't mind me going to a strip club.

But I know my friend's DW will forbid him to go to a strip club for my party.

I know my we would all like to have the OPTION of choosing whether to go to one or not. Sure.. I admit.. going to a strip club might be fun. (It's a guy thing, I guess.. )

But I value my friend much more and I don't want trouble to start with him and his DW.

Yet.. it my bachelor party.. and does she have the right to tell us in essence what we ALL can and cannot do. We want to feel like we have the option to do it if we want to.

Opinions.....

june262004 Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party

Why can't girls trust their men to goto strip clubs?
DjPiLL Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by OctGroom

The reason for the combo thing was that his FW didn't want him to go to a strip club. She felt that bcause he was going to be her husband --> why would he want to look at other women? (There's some validity to that).

NOW.. my bachelor party is coming up...

But I know my friend's DW will forbid him to go to a strip club for my party.





Ok I will probably get with this response... but I wouldn't be the LIW Anti-Christ for saying the 'norm'.

I am actually in the same situation. One of the guys in my groom's party has a wife (they just got married) that is like this... the 'controlling' type.

My BM is considering Vegas for a weekend for my BP. She is threating not allowing him to go to Vegas because of this. Yet my BM is MARRIED and his wife has no problem. My other groomsman has a LT-GF and she has no problem with it. And my FW doesn't care either... she just gave me the three rules 'Don't f--k anyone... don't drink and drive... and don't gable the co-op away'.

I think its a load of ******** personally. She has some SERIOUS issues to forbid something like this. The reason that he is married alone should be enough for him to go out. Its not like he is going to date anyone else. He is married for christ sakes.


In my case... I am going to give my groomsman the benefit of the doubt that he will take care of this problem. If she insists on him not going... then I am gonna have a little 'heart to heart' with her myself.
ChristineC68 Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party

No she doesn't have the right to dictate what goes on for your bachelor party but...

since your friend is included in the b-party it seems that she will have an impact on it.


Personally, I can't imagine forbidding my husband to do anything that would not break a law or our vows, anything else I trust him completely.
maiahsdad Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party

then just go else were.....friends are worth more then not having them

Kate Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party

I think you can do a combo (guys/girls) thing and invite the girls to the strip club

Its your party do what you like....
OctGroom Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by Kate

I think you can do a combo (guys/girls) thing and invite the girls to the strip club

Its your party do what you like....




LOL.. Priceless!

Actually.. my FW wants HER OWN bachelorette party and doesn't want me anywhere near it. It's vice versa too.

This is the only event/thing that we would act like this about.

All I gotta say is this.. for my friend and me.. he's officially married.. i'm still waiting to make it official. (40 more days or so!!!)

The day I put a ring on her finger.. that was it. It was the finale to skirt-chasing -->No more for Zorro. Elvis has left the theater. Going.. going... good-bye. LOL

The same with him.

If I wanted to hook up with every girl, I certainly wouldn't be getting married.

I can't call going to a strip bar anything more than a rite of passage.. as dumb as that might seem to the females here.

But believe me.. neither he nor I want anything to do with these dancers except gawk. LOL I wish she would understand that.

She would never lose my friend to them so easily. He's a GOOD guy!

That's why he's my friend.

DjPiLL Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by OctGroom

But believe me.. neither he nor I want anything to do with these dancers except gawk. LOL I wish she would understand that.





Thats the exact reason why this is such a silly thing to argue about. Who in their right mind would ever want any part of these strippers?

They are cool to gawk at.... but thats about it. I can count the amount of times ive been to a strip club with one hand. Its not something I would do out of the blue and call the guys on.
june262004 Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party

I go to the strip club with Mike... WHO CARES He is looking at them not Banging them


I also let him go on his own TRUST!!!!
OctGroom Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by june262004

I go to the strip club with Mike... WHO CARES He is looking at them not Banging them


I also let him go on his own TRUST!!!!




Exactly.

MY FW is going to have a bachelorette party where they all go out for dinner.. maybe to a spa.. bars.. lounges.. and dancing... and tons of drinking. They're getting a bus which is cool.
I;m happy about that.

She does not want male strippers or anything like that. But it's fine if she did. I know 110% that she would not do anything that she could not tell me about the next day.

If she did, I would be gone immediately.

And it's a two-way street..

If I did anything to betray her trust.. she would be gone. And rightfully so.

It's all about trust.
june262004 Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party

I might get flamed for this but..( im putting on my Flame retardant suit) If you can't let ure S.O. go to a strip club or out with friends. I think you should reevaluate your relationship and rethink getting married.

DjPiLL Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by june262004

I might get flamed for this but..( im putting on my Flame retardant suit) If you can't let ure S.O. go to a strip club or out with friends. I think you should reevaluate your relationship and rethink getting married.




^^^^^^^^^^^^

What she said.
june262004 Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by DjPiLL


Posted by june262004

I might get flamed for this but..( im putting on my Flame retardant suit) If you can't let ure S.O. go to a strip club or out with friends. I think you should reevaluate your relationship and rethink getting married.




^^^^^^^^^^^^

What she said.



You mean we agree on something.
OctGroom Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by june262004

I might get flamed for this but..( im putting on my Flame retardant suit) If you can't let ure S.O. go to a strip club or out with friends. I think you should reevaluate your relationship and rethink getting married.




ABANDON SHIP! ABANDON SHIP!!!
I can't believe you went there!!!!

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

HAHA

you're 100% right!
june262004 Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by OctGroom


Posted by june262004

I might get flamed for this but..( im putting on my Flame retardant suit) If you can't let ure S.O. go to a strip club or out with friends. I think you should reevaluate your relationship and rethink getting married.




ABANDON SHIP! ABANDON SHIP!!!
I can't believe you went there!!!!

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

HAHA

you're 100% right!



DjPiLL Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by june262004

You mean we agree on something.




Apprently so.

Its all good though. I have no problem agreeing with people when I feel they are right and they make a good point.
june262004 Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by DjPiLL


Posted by june262004

You mean we agree on something.




Apprently so.

Its all good though. I have no problem agreeing with people when I feel they are right and they make a good point.



Agreed. I have no point arguing with people when I think they are wrong.
DjPiLL Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by june262004

Agreed. I have no point arguing with people when I think they are wrong.




Tru Tru... and frankly I enjoy the argueing part more than the agreeing part.

Agreeing is boring and overrated.

maiahsdad Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by DjPiLL


Posted by june262004

Agreed. I have no point arguing with people when I think they are wrong.




Tru Tru... and frankly I enjoy the argueing part more than the agreeing part.

Agreeing is boring and overrated.




YUP......life is too short to just agree with people
june262004 Posted:

Re: MY last new topic of the week... Ethical Dilemna about my Bachelor Party


Posted by DjPiLL


Posted by june262004

Agreed. I have no point arguing with people when I think they are wrong.




Tru Tru... and frankly I enjoy the argueing part more than the agreeing part.

Agreeing is boring and overrated.




AGREED! I think I must goto bed... My DH is past out on the couch next to me watching the back of his eyelids and snoring (which he doesnt do).

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