no one loves us (long winded)

i finalized the guest list last night. 247 people. which is amusing since we don't have many people in our lives. i made a joke saying 'and about 50 of them will show up!' it wasn't really a joke though... most of the people we are inviting is because we 'have' to. but neither one of us is close with our extended family. if they show up, it'll be our first meeting with many of them.
my grandmother passed away in january and i was standing with my older brother at the wake and people kept coming up and talking to him, and then walking away without a word to me. they didn't recognize me because i was a little kid the last time they saw me.
the majority of both of our families live out of state. and being that we aren't close with them, i can't imagine many of them flying in for the occasion.
FH is an only child.
i have lost 3 out of 4 grandparents.
my father is an only child so no aunts, uncles or 1st cousins there. my mom has a sister and a brother. he sister died in february and her kids are 17 and live in vegas with their father who we barely know (he had nothing to do with them until their mother passed) so i highly doubt he will be buying them plane tickets for the occasion. my mom's brother (lives in CA)... well he and his family didn't bother to make an appearance for his own mother's or sister's funeral so i highly doubt they will be flying out for my wedding.
my sister made a comment a few months ago, when she saw a preliminary guest list. she said that i was just filling up seats with anyone because i don't have any 'real' friends to invite. isn't that nice? my only sister - my MOH. there's a history there but that's another story. thing is, she shouldn't even be my MOH but if i didn't as her i never would have heard the end of it... my brother didn't make her godmom of his kids and she wouldn't speak to him or his wife for 3 years. anyway, what she said was harsh... and it's not that i don't have any 'real' friends... it's just that i don't have many close friends. i never have. i've just kept a few close ones with me. and even that list is dwindling... 2 moved upstate and to vegas and haven't been great at keeping in touch. but it's not like i invited people who mean nothing to me. maybe they aren't close close friends but they mean something to me.
oh and get this... when i told my brother's wife the wedding date, she goes 'ugh, i hope my h.s. reunion isn't the night before - i don't know how i'd go to both!' yeah, my SIL has been with my brother since i was 4. so we're like sisters. gee, don't let my wedding get in your way!
i dunno... i guess i am just feeling down. i know my sis is planning a bridal shower for me and i don't even want one. partially because i know she's not sincerely happy for me getting married and she makes these nasty comments and i just feel like i don't want anything from her and partially because i am afraid i am just going to be reminded of how few people i have in my life.
we'll be mailing out our invites next month... and i'm worried no one's going to reply 'yes'. it's just going to be FH, our parents and our bridal party

Re: no one loves us (long winded)

Youa re probably having wedding paranoia. I think that everyone has doubts as to who is actually going to come to their wedding. You's be surprised, though-- people love a party and an excuse to travel. Once the responses start coming back, you will feel better and you'll see. Best of Luck! :

Re: no one loves us (long winded)

Re: no one loves us (long winded)

Cheer up!! Everything will work out for the best!

Re: no one loves us (long winded)

its quality, not quantity, that matters. dont stress about numbers, just focus on your fh, family you're close to, and your few good friends. and try not to lose touch with your 2 close friends moving upstate.

Re: no one loves us (long winded)

Re: no one loves us (long winded)

Awww sweetie! You will be surprised who will make the effort to come. Do not stress over this! Like someone else said as long as those that matter to you are there, that is all that matters.

Re: no one loves us (long winded)

---

Posted by espresso

its quality, not quantity, that matters. dont stress about numbers, just focus on your fh, family you're close to, and your few good friends. and try not to lose touch with your 2 close friends moving upstate.

---

She's right. I can't even fill one table at my wedding with my family. The tables seat 10 and only people are coming. But these 8 people want to be there and I have a wonderful FI, so in the end it all balences out.

You will have a great wedding, because you are marring your best friend, what could be better than that?

Re: no one loves us (long winded)

Weddings seem to make families do weird things and when the family acts strangely to begin with, the wedding brings out the worst in them.
Focus on yourself and FH and hopefully the other details will melt away. Hang in there.

Re: no one loves us (long winded)

---

Posted by espresso

its quality, not quantity, that matters. dont stress about numbers, just focus on your fh, family you're close to, and your few good friends. and try not to lose touch with your 2 close friends moving upstate.

---

I totally agree. We are inviting 106 because we value those in our lives not to meet some quota and there are plenty of people who we chose NOT to invite because they are not a part of our life even though we 'should' invite them. It is your day and relax knowing that those who come love you and no matter if its 20 or 200 it's YOUR and FH day and no one can make it any more special then the 2 of you so don't let them upset you either!!!!!

Re: no one loves us (long winded)

---

Posted by SwissMiss06


Weddings seem to make families do weird things and when the family acts strangely to begin with, the wedding brings out the worst in them.
Focus on yourself and FH and hopefully the other details will melt away. Hang in there.

---

AMEN sista! I thought the opposite would happen, boy was I wrong!!!!