When to tell boss???

I need suggestions on when to tell my boss that I'm pregnant. I will be 12 weeks in the first week of December. So, initially, I thought I'd tell him after Thanksgiving. I'm having 2nd thoughts about it now. Should I wait until 4 months, or when I start to show?

I've only been here for 8 months. My boss is a male, in his late 30's, not married, no kids. In general I have no complaints about him, he's been good so far, like with my wedding, he was flexible with me taking time off, even though I was a new employee. I haven't made any good friends here, so I can't tell anyone or ask around about prior experiences.

My sister said to wait longer, just b/c in general bosses don't like it, even if they're legally not allowed to hold it against you, they might. On the other hand, I'm dying to tell everyone, so they know what's going on with me, and why I'm always tired, hungry and nauseous!
Thanks.

Edited to say that I work for New York State, and am in a Union. I'm also planning on quitting a month before my due date, but of course I won't tell them until then.

Re: When to tell boss???

I would wait as much as possible. A friend of a friend got fired for being pregnant and then the company filed for bankruptcy, so she couldn't even sue them. Her company had layoffs a few month before the girl announced that she was pregnant, which is how she knew it wasn't related to layoff, etc.

Re: When to tell boss???

Nina,
I would say WAIT WAIT WAIT as long as you can.
Is your boss very dependent on you ? It really depends on how much will be affected when youre gone. Like if youre his assistant and work directly with him every day, it might freak him out that he wont have that crutch to lean on, that one person that does so much work... but if you are one of several employees, then it might not be so bad if you told him.. does that make sense ?

All in all, I still think you should wait it out as long as you can. Although, if you did tell him now, it can benefit you in that he will probably give you less work, be understanding when you have Dr's apptmts and are running to the bathroom every half hour..(and since you plan to leave, and dont plan to 'climb the ladder' there, less work might be better right now ! ) It really depends in each situation... and since youre in a union, you are 'safe' with your job right ? I dont know much about unions, but can you ask them for advice privately ?

Re: When to tell boss???

I told when I was 4 months - and wish I could of waited even longer. B/C now I always hear OH I know you must be tired (when I'm not) my work has not changed -
nothing I've done has been any different then before I was pregnant but as far as my boss is concerned, I must not be doing as much...
Good Luck and Congrats on your pregnancy.

Re: When to tell boss???

When I told my supervisor at 3 mths she told me that I could of waited. Believe it or not she waited till her 6 month to tell her boss.

Re: When to tell boss???

WAIT! DO NOT TELL YOUR JOB until you start to show (when it's absolutely necessary).

I told my boss early, b/c I wanted to request a transfer and move closer to my family in NY. Well! It was the biggest MISTAKE of my life! My boss was such a creep to me, and my request for a transfer was denied. I was so miserable and hated my company for allowing my boss to treat me the way he did. It's a long story, and not worth going into.

If you're planning to quit anyway, then keep your personal info to yourself! Share your excitement and happiness at home with your friends and family.

Re: When to tell boss???

Well said, Claudine !!

Nina, its not worth youre being stressed if all of a sudden your 'single 30-something' boss, is resentful or even jealous of your marriage and family and becomes a creep !

Enjoy this wonderful time and like Claud said
'Share your excitement and happiness at home with your friends and family'

Let us know what you decide and how it goes !

Re: When to tell boss???

Thanks for your repsonses everyone. I think you're right, and I will wait until as long as possible, probably until the new year. I'm not thin, a little overweight, and I don't have a flat tummy to begin with, so I don't think anyone will notice. I've never really had to deal with the Union, but I'm sure that at least the Human Resources Dept has to keep things confidential. I'd say I play an important role to my boss, but I'm an adminstrator, not a manager, and I work exactly 9 to 5, so my work is not extremely demanding.

Re: When to tell boss???

Any ?S you make to HR MUST be kept confidential. That's what I gfound out. I went there to find out what our leave policy was b4 telling my boss.I eventually told her at 3 months...and some of my co workers had their suspicions by then.
But, my situation is diff than yours as my boss is a woman with 2 kids....( but still an erratic person!)