Brides Helping Brides ™ - XOXO

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XOXO

Maribelle7777 Posted: Oct 08, 2004 05:46 PM+

Maribelle7777 MEMBER SINCE: 5/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5699 WEDDING DATE: Apr 30, 2004

Posted: Oct 08, 2004 05:46 PM

Re: ....

Posted by dm24angel

I'll probably get flamed for this but I think that attitude of 'expecting' a gift is your problem.
I am sometimes ashamed to know that people are out there that have a wedding and expect either to get a gift, to have the guest 'pay' for their plate , or to complain about the amount of a gift.

Here's how I feel, maybe someone else does too. I am having a wedding to marry the man of my dreams. I am INVITING guests. They do not HAVE to bring a gift as I invited them for them. If I choose to have $150 pp reception dinner then unless I make people know their is a cover charge I cannot expect people to give or if they do, give what they can afford.
I have been a guest at a wedding where I have given $100 for me and FH because we were broke and I have been to weddings where we have given $500. Should I stay home if I cant afford anything?

I get realy opinionated over this so I will shut up now, because it infuriates me that people even expect a gift at a wedding. Thats presumptious and lends to the reason why weddings in NY cost $50,000!

::::clap clap clap clap::::::::::

I couldn't say it better myself.

My advice is to send a card, thank them for coming to the wedding and that you hoped they had as great a time as you did. And not mention it again. Yet don't go out of your way for them if they have a party where a gift is appropriate to bring/give.

heidla Posted: Oct 08, 2004 05:52 PM+

heidla MEMBER SINCE: 10/02 TOTAL POSTS : 5901 WEDDING DATE: May 28, 2004

Posted: Oct 08, 2004 05:52 PM

Re: ....

Posted by carline

yeah grow up it happens welcome to world of people with no money but generous at heart .they showed you support,send a thank you a card and get over it.

WOW!!!! I think that your point was lost in your extremly rude tone.

I am from TN. Weddings in NY are a totally different world. FH and I gave out TY picture in frames at our wedding. We then only sent out TY cards to those that sent gifts. We did not want those that did not give a gift did not feel like we were pressuring them for one and we had already thanked them with our TY at the wedding.

Rainmama Posted: Oct 08, 2004 06:15 PM+

Rainmama MEMBER SINCE: 1/04 TOTAL POSTS : 4576 WEDDING DATE: Sep 18, 2004

Posted: Oct 08, 2004 06:15 PM

Re: ....

Posted by lorsin

I've posted about this before, but I was really taken aback at the first couple of LI weddings I went to that the bride and groom go around to tables to collect cards.

They do WHAT?!

Xelindrya Posted: Oct 08, 2004 06:23 PM+

Xelindrya MEMBER SINCE: 7/03 TOTAL POSTS : 7855 WEDDING DATE: Oct 23, 2004

Posted: Oct 08, 2004 06:23 PM

Re: ....

Posted by palebride

Posted by babygirl0918

thank you to both of you.......thank god it's time for the weekend, i think i need it!

amen to the weekend!!!

3 days off for me!!