Once this happened to me, I knew that I had to come on here and talk to you girls...
a little background..
FH lived with this really nice guy his senior year in college - they had been friends their entire 4 years because of being on the football team together- I met him my junior year and his girlfriend, who is now his FW. We all hung out together our senior year- like a lot. She and I actually drove through a blizzard together to see them play in their last playoff game. Anyway, what I'm trying to say, is that all 4 of us are extremely good friends.
Well, we got their wedding invitation today and it said 'Mr. Matthew XXXX and GUEST' and GUEST???? I could not believe it. And guest?? Like who else do they think he is going to bring? And aren't we all friends? I am beyond upset and seriously hurt by this. Am I nuts for feeling this way???? I just cannot believe this. It's not like they don't know me or my name or anything like that, which is why I'm sick over it. I just feel really hurt.
ETA: FH is in the wedding party
MrsQ-in2007
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
Posted by MattandTricia07
Posted by MrsQ-in2007
Tricia, I'd be very hurt and upset if I were in your shoes!!! Last year my FH got an invite with his name 'and guest' - this was before we got engaged, but we had been together for over 3 years and were talking marriage... anyway, I was annoyed, but I figured they just didn't know my last name and didn't ask or whatever. But in your case, you ARE ALL FRIENDS!!!! They OBVIOUSLY know your name.
I don't know. Maybe their parents or friends sent out the invites and ... well, I don't know. That s*cks!!!
Even if their parents sent out the invites, they all know me too I just feel really hurt
whoah, then that is just beyond RUDE. I'd have a hard time saying something in a nice way - I'd probably say something in a sarcastic way to see what they say...
Maybe your FH can call them and say, 'Hey, just wondering who you thought I would bring instead of Tricia' and when they say, we thought you'd bring Tricia, he can say, so why didn't you invite her??? That way he's asking and it's not rude or whatever.
Seriously though, I'm so p*ssed on your behalf!!!! Ugh! Some people are such a$$es... sorry, I know they're your friends, but in this case they were a$$es.
I'm still hoping there was some kind of mistake somewhere.
chrissyandvin
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
I am so sorry!! I feel your pain! My FH's uncle's new wife put Vinny and Guest on our place cards for their sons christening and I am his Fiance and we are family!! Some people really just have no brain when it comes to that kind of stuff sometimes!!
bettybcafe
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
Wow...that is very rude..Im sorry... I would be pretty upset if that happened to me
poogie
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
NOW SEE ITS NOT LIKE THEY DIDNT KNOW THAT YOU TWO ARE TOGETHER....'AS A COUPLE' OH YEAH I WOULD BE FREAKIN TOO...THE NERVE.....AND GUEST? DONT SWEAT IT AND JUST RETURN THE INVITE WITH YOUR NAME ON IT TOO.
Starwend
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
That's extremely RUDE!!! Some people just do the most stupidest things!! Don't let it bother you!!
TommysWife08
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
FlowerBride
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
OMG the exact same thing happened to me!!l FHs best friend since 3rd grade. FH and I were together AT LEAST 5 years before they got married..and I got the 'and Guest.' I was so insulted that I secretly want to invite them the same way even though theyve been married for 2 years now but seriously another friend questioned the same thing and the bride (at the time) said thats what the ettiquette book said to do since FH and I didnt live together at the time. since she had very little common sense to begin with i let it go but i was def insulted. her and FH's friend must be reading the same ettiquette book
drpepper318
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
That's terribly rude of them. I'd be insulted and hurt by that too. I think you should say something. You'll feel better if you do.
AllJoy
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
Yes, people are clueless. Its so sad! I agree you should say something.
kat74
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
when was the last time you had contact with them? Perhaps they didn't know you were engaged-- or even still together. Maybe they didn't want to be presumptious.
If they did know you were still together--then it was very rude
TheFutureMrsM
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
I would be beyond Pisssed. That is the rudest thing i could ever imagine, What is wrong with them? They should of had the decency to put your name down.
I would RSVP a big fat NO
LB and DC
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
that is very upsetting!!! i am so sorry this happened!
my only guess is that someone told them you write 'and guest' if the couple you are inviting them is not married yet - i honestly don't think they meant to offend you!!
MattandTricia07
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
Posted by kat74
when was the last time you had contact with them? Perhaps they didn't know you were engaged-- or even still together. Maybe they didn't want to be presumptious.
If they did know you were still together--then it was very rude
they were there the weekend we got engaged upstate at our college....the FW even gave Matt suggestions about where to do it and then celebrated with us that night at dinner. Since then we have had summer visits, phone calls, emails, etc. We are close friends.
MattandTricia07
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
Posted by TheFutureMrsM
I would be beyond Pisssed. That is the rudest thing i could ever imagine, What is wrong with them? They should of had the decency to put your name down.
I would RSVP a big fat NO
I would, if I could, but FH IS IN THE WEDDING PARTY!! (sorry to scream, but I forgot to mention this)
SherinJeff
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
Posted by MattandTricia07
Posted by laural2979
I can completely understand why you're upset. That really is rude and I would probably say something to them if I were you.
Part of me wants to say something, but I don't know what to say...any ideas?
why dont you have your FH send the reply card and put someone elses name on it... then when they ask why YOU werent coming.. he can say because (you) were not invited...
LOL.. Im sorry. This is NOT funny. I think I would call myself if you are that close and say.. 'hey.. whatsup with not inviting me?'. You could say it lighthearted to see what they say. They may not even know the error... or.. they could have an explanation that would make you feel better. Since this really bothers you... Whatever you do.. dont NOT say anything. It will eat you up and everytime they talk about the wedding... it will make you mad.
mrsh2b
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
Posted by MattandTricia07
Posted by laural2979
I can completely understand why you're upset. That really is rude and I would probably say something to them if I were you.
Part of me wants to say something, but I don't know what to say...any ideas?
Yes...regardless of whether they are married or not, when you send out your invites, you put Mr. ___ & guest and see how that goes over. An eye for an eye I say!
Seriously, that is so rude and annoying. I don't blame you at all.
ETA: Before I posted this I did not see that your FH is in the wedding party. That is so unbelievably rude! Definitely send '& guest' on their invite. What the hell?!
bonitachyc
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
Posted by MrsQ-in2007 Maybe your FH can call them and say, 'Hey, just wondering who you thought I would bring instead of Tricia' and when they say, we thought you'd bring Tricia, he can say, so why didn't you invite her??? That way he's asking and it's not rude or whatever. .
- - i agree!!
sooo sorry they treated you this way tricia that's so mean and retarded! etiquette or not, if i know you for umpteen years and your FH is in my bridal party i'm not gonna freaking put & Guest...arghhh ppl are so IDIOTIC
Mrs. V 2008
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
wow thats very rude! i to would be very offended
milana
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
That is beyond rude, youre all friends, what were they thinking?! Maybe it was an accident but either way i would be really upset. Can you ask them why they addressed it that way and was done intentionally?
ETA: FH is in their bridal party ok now that is incredibly rude and incredibly weird. Like someone else mentioned above, i would send them an invite with & Guest too!
tink79
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Re: I cannot believe this- I am so upset
that is so incredibly rude! The same thing happened to me, my cousin just got married a few weeks ago. I was in the BP when the invite for the rehersal dinner came it said Chrisitna XX and guest! I was sooo pissed. I told my cousin and she was pissed too. She specifically gave her MIL all the sig others names and MIL just took it upon herself to write '& Guest' on not only mine but another engaged bridesmaids invites. It was just soo wrong!
