Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

While I respect Mary's right to make a choice for herself, I don't understand placing her on a pedastal either. I applaud each and every one of you for doing whatever it is you want to do, and refuse to act as though anyone else is less worthy of admiration because of their decision not to wait. Blah. Personally, I think her wedding will be no more or less special then anyone elses. Good for all of you for falling in love and finding someone to spend the rest of your life with.

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

Good girl hotelcalie, it's hard to resist on anniversaries

Mary, you got us all beat !!!!! LOL

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

This thread is cracking me up! I suggested that we abstain a month before the wedding and my now DH was like 'NO WAY'. It ended up that we just didn't have time to anyway....so it was like we abstained for a week and a half.

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

Valenia I do agree with you..

Just bc each of us has engaged in the act of sexual intercourse doesn't mean our night won't be special and we don't treasure that night as a married couple...

OK I am DONE!!!

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

Valenia, I dont think anyone is putting her on a pedestal, they are saying they admire what she's done (or not done, LOL

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

Mary, that is wonderful! You will have such a special wedding night.

My cousins were both virgins when they got married (they were ages 29 and 35). If your family likes to joke around (like mine does) you may consider not staying in the same hotel as the rest of your guests (hehe). My cousins didn't have the quietest night (for a little bit right after the reception) b/c everyone was staying at the hotel and my cousin's brothers thought they were funny!

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

Everyone is entitled to their own opinions, I don't think anyone has said that if you have sexual relations with your FH before your wedding, will your wedding night not be special. I also don't think anyone is putting Mary on a pedestal. You can tell in her post she knew people were going to say something, whether it was good or bad... we were just applauding her for her beliefs and actions towards this issue, that's all. It is unlikely nowadays as we all know and I think she deserves some type of compliment, no matter what it is. JMO.

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

Valenia, I am puzzled by your post-????


I think Mary is a wonderful person. To be a virgin in this day an age takes alot of strength and commitment and I really admire that.

There have been times that I wish I could be a virgin again. She is going to give her husband a beautiful gift. We are not putting her on a pedestal,but commending her efforts.

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I want a compliment for being SO good today..

hahahahahahaha..

I am getting wacky since its time to go and Ron is waiting for me!

Edited to say..

I am RONNIES gift.. With the ups and downs we have had.. He knows I am the best and that is his gift.....

Ok..I am playing....

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

Valenia, I'm w/ you. Our wedding night will be special because we married each other that day, don't need anything else to make it special!

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

I agree. I don't think anyone is putting Mary on a pedestal. From her initial post you knew she expected replies - good or bad. In this day and age it takes a lot to abstain and that is her choice. And I am sure she is in a class with only a few others. The rest of us will still have an awesome time. It's just a different situation.

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

I think that we will all have special wedding nights. Virginity doesn't change that. Your first night as a married couple will be special no matter what you do. I think that Mary and her FH's choice will allow them to have the special wedding night that they have wanted and waited for, and I am happy for them for that.

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I suggested to FH and he went 'You ARE kidding, right?' and I said 'Why? What's wrong with it?' only half-kidding and he goes 'We already act like an old married couple and now you want to take it away for a few months?! No way,girlie!'

By the way, he gets it plenty.

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I knew I shouldn't have said anything. I thank those who said they respect my (our) decision. Every time this is brought up why do people have to argue? Listen, I shared a very special piece of my personal life with you all. One that many would never have done. I never said a thing about anyone whose decision is different than ours so why would you do this to me? Sometimes opinions can really hurt a person so maybe at times its best to say nothing. I wasn't looking for recognition. Just stating my cirumstance. People treat me as if I have a disease. I guess that’s impossible under the circumstances (guess I still do have a sense of humor) It's a decision that I thought I would share with my LIW friends. So, please stop upsetting me and drop it, ok?

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

Mary, Dont be upset. I personally think its very nice. While it will be a special night for all of us, I think yours will be very different. You will be experiencing yourselves for the first time and I do think that is very special.



Hey I didnt lose my virginity till I was 21 and people are still shocked when I tell them that.

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

Mary, I applaud your choice to still be a virgin. I think it's wonderful. You should be put on a pedestal because it takes alot to do what you have done (or should I say not done)
All the best Mary.

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I'm with Theresa on this one.....I'm his gift and he is mine and we both live home so private time for nooky or just to sit and talk is hard to come by so we treasure it to the fullest.

Mary: God bless you, I think its great and no matter what anyone says we all admire you. I hope your day is the greatest (and the night even better )

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I think everyone's day will be so special whether we abstain for a week, a month, or not at all
We're getting married, and what a feeling that must be

Mary, I'm sorry you got down after the discussions earlier, but I think most agree that it is admirable that you made a choice and stuck to it. Also, you WILL be sharing something VERY special with your FH for the first time as Husband and Wife. Something to be proud of.

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

LMAO! You girls are hysterical!
First of all, I don't want to upset you, but Mary, I think its wonderful that you are waiting! Don't let anyone discourage you!
Since my FH is overseas, we are already abstaining.
We won't be together once he is back, so we will be abstaining again. So we aren't going to wait. It will be special enough because we will be married and it will be our first night together as husband and wife. But it is everyone's own decision. You do what you feel is right for you.

Re: Not asking this question to be inapropriate but....

With our crazy schedules-I think we started abstaining! But seriously, I'm not sure if we'll abstain or not before the wedding-to me, it doesn't make that much of a difference. Anytime I am 'with' my FH is special to me and just knowing it is our first time as husband and wife will make that night even more special-regardless of if we did the deed a week ago or not!