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Why do people say such things? (Vent)
KathleenG Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:21 PM+
KathleenG MEMBER SINCE: 4/03 TOTAL POSTS : 3607 WEDDING DATE: Sep 05, 2004
Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:21 PM bride-minus.png

Why do people say such things? (Vent)

I have noticed quite a bit lately that a few of my friends have made some strange comments. Most popular is them talking about their own weddings and how they would never want to have such an elaborate affair, money is much better spent on a down payment on a house, it is a waste etc...... What really bothers me is that this wedding means a lot to me!!! Maybe, in the end, we are spending too much money but I don't really appreciate the comments!!! What kills me most is that neither I nor FH are wealthy people, nor are our families. It is not as though we have people throwing money at us!!!! If that were the case, I may be able to understand the jealous and petty comments. The bottom line is, I have been to many a wedding in my day and have appreciated them all: big, small, mid-sized. Has anybody else gotten similar comments or is it just me? Whatever happened to tact?
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MarcellaBella Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:22 PM+
MarcellaBella MEMBER SINCE: 7/02 TOTAL POSTS : 7370 WEDDING DATE: Aug 09, 2003
Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:22 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Why do people say such things? (Vent)

Tell them to go funk themselves..

They are probably saying that as a cover up b./c they wish they had more money to have an elaborate affair..

THis is YOUR wedding.. only you and your fiance are required to be pleased with your wedding, NO ONE ELSE>
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NYCHICK Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:27 PM+
NYCHICK MEMBER SINCE: 9/03 TOTAL POSTS : 4604 WEDDING DATE: Sep 05, 2004 WEDDING LOCATION: New York ..
Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:27 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Why do people say such things? (Vent)

weddings trigger the crazy gene in people. Don't sweat it. Just know that your wedding is going to be abslutely gorgeous. You are going to give them a reason to be jealous.
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may04bride Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:29 PM+
may04bride MEMBER SINCE: 10/03 TOTAL POSTS : 117 WEDDING DATE: May 15, 2004
Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:29 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Why do people say such things? (Vent)

Don't worry about it. I hear the same things. We also are not wealthy and are paying for most of the weddings ourselves. I am sure these people don't mean to hurt your feelings. They are jealous. I know it hurts though. Just try to take it with a grain of salt!

I am sure we are all spending ton of $$ on our weddings and there probably are better things that couLd be done with our money. But it is OUR money that we worked hard for and this is the way I want to spend it!
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KathleenG Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:31 PM+
KathleenG MEMBER SINCE: 4/03 TOTAL POSTS : 3607 WEDDING DATE: Sep 05, 2004
Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:31 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Why do people say such things? (Vent)

Thanks ladies for all the responses!! I am totally at peace with my decision to have the nice wedding I always wanted!! What I don't understand is how people are dumb enough to make such inappropriate comments!!!
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neesiepie Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:34 PM+
neesiepie MEMBER SINCE: 9/03 TOTAL POSTS : 3103 WEDDING DATE: Sep 16, 2005
Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:34 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Why do people say such things? (Vent)

You know what I was also thinking, people say stupid things ALL THE TIME. I think that some people also don't even realize what they are saying hurts. I think that we are a LOT more...PROTECTIVE...of our own weddings and we take what people say to heart a little more than normal.....
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Rob-luvs-me Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:57 PM+
Rob-luvs-me MEMBER SINCE: 10/02 TOTAL POSTS : 5021 WEDDING DATE: Apr 24, 2004
Posted: Jan 13, 2004 03:57 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Why do people say such things? (Vent)

People say those kinds of things because they are jealous and hope to be hurtful since they couldn't have what you are having.

One of our GM is getting married after us and FH is the best man in their wedding - about a month before our E-party the FW kept telling us that 'their e-party was going to be the PARTY OF THE YEAR' whatever - Some people are ONLY happy putting down others -

Just enjoy your day and IGNORE these comments they would be happy knowing it upset you.
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nferrandi Posted: Jan 13, 2004 04:40 PM+
nferrandi MEMBER SINCE: 12/03 TOTAL POSTS : 5367 WEDDING DATE: Oct 09, 2004
Posted: Jan 13, 2004 04:40 PM bride-minus.png

Re: Why do people say such things? (Vent)

I've had a few people comment on the money being spent too, but fortunately, none of them were my friends. My FIL's have issues with certain aspects of my spending, but I do my best to keep the peace, yet still have my way. My FFIL is a photographer and wanted me to use his friend and his son for the photos and video. They would have done both for $500, as a personal favor. I saw the photos and they were nothing like what I was looking for. I wound up doing research and getting a good deal at Duet. Even though my FFIL still thinks I'm spending too much money, at least he knows that I shopped around for a good price and he's impressed with what I'm getting for the money.
For the most part, you just have to brush off people's comments. There is a lot of jealousy over weddings and although people should keep it to themselves, they tend to like to rain on other people's parades. Don't worry about it. You're spending $$ on making yourselves happy on your wedding day, isn't that the way it should be?
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