I can't take it anymore, (FMIL vent)

My FMIL and i use to get along really well. Since her son and i told her we set a date and booked a hall she has been driving me nuts. I am getting married in her church, which i am not happy about but my FH loves the church so i can't say no. The one thing she is doing to really PI** me off is she keeps adding people to the guest list. I wouldn't care if it was one or two people but it has been 3 or 4 every time i see her. The big problem is my FH hasn't seen these people in 10-16 years. She actually asked me if we could send a few of them a recent photo of the two of us. I have been with my FH for 5 yrs if i haven't met or heard of these people i don't think they should be at the wedding or am i wrong?????????? My FH has been great at telling his mom to stop adding people so now she adds people when only i am there. Now she's making me out to look like the bad guy. Thank god my FH knows me better than how she is portraying me.

Sorry to vent but this is driving me crazy.

Re: I can't take it anymore, (FMIL vent)

I am sorry you have to go thru this. I understand. I do!
My FMIL is doing the same to us. We were informed that we simply HAD to invite all the relatives et al.. that my FH has not seen in 5 plus years. It was such a jump in the list we are considering changing venues to accomodate them. Did FIL offer to pay?? NOT!! When FH mentioned it - they said they would give us our wedding present (a check) early so that we could use it if we had to.

Hang in there. It's all we can do I guess. At least your FH understands!

Re: I can't take it anymore, (FMIL vent)

I am glad to see I am not crazy i feel like she is out to get me as mad as she can. Last night she asked (NO she told me) that my FH second cousin is coming with her 3 children did i mention they are all under 10 yrs old. I don't want children at the wedding, i have told her that and i guess it just isn't clicking. If she was going to pay for all of the other people she is inviting i might be a little less mad but after she made the comment that (me and FH) 'You two are going to be very busy meeting and mingling with all of your guests, maybe you should add another hour to your reception. That is when i really hit the roof.

All i have ever wanted is a wedding where i would mingle during the cocktail hour and 1-2 hours during the reception and then enjoy myself the last 3 hours or am i dreaming

Re: I can't take it anymore, (FMIL vent)

im glad your fh is sticking with you on this... if you dont want children you need to be strict on it cause it seems that once one person gets to bring one, another finds out and demands it too..fh and i decided anyone who we dont see/talk to at least once in the last year or so doesnt need to be invited...

Re: I can't take it anymore, (FMIL vent)

OMG! Is your fi related to my fi? I had the SAME problem. As much as I hate to admit it, I finally caved in. But, she has already paid us for ALL of the expenses for her extra guests. That was the compromise we made. We'd invite them, as long as she paid for their dinner, invites, floral costs, favors, etc. And, she did. She even volunteered to contribute toward the cost of the band, since her guests would also be listening to the music.

So, maybe you can make some kind of arrangement like that?

Re: I can't take it anymore, (FMIL vent)

My question is, Is it wrong to want to enjoy your day?? I am hoping i am not going to spend my whole day being introduced and having to mingle with these people i have never met and will never see again??? I can see it now, my wedding reveiw is going to read, my venders were great yet i never ate, danced, or did anything meet and mingle with 37 people i never knew???? I am loosing sleep over all of this as silly as it sounds. No one ever warned me that weddings are such a probem to plan because it is never about what the bride or groom want.