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Wedding Forums > Brides Helping Brides ™ > I'm so sad...need to vent
I'm so sad...need to vent
nenna023
Posted: Dec 09, 2004 09:57 PM+

Posted: Dec 09, 2004 09:57 PM
I'm so sad...need to vent
Ok to make a lone story short I converted to judiasm to be with my now FH b/c his parents are pretty strict and I miss my holidays!!! It is so depressing not having a tree and decorations. I'm in such a depressed mode but I just have to deal with it. But I hate it! xmas is everywhere! Radio, comercials, stores, its so sad and i miss it!!Ok thanks for listening
RedHead
Posted: Dec 09, 2004 09:59 PM+

Posted: Dec 09, 2004 09:59 PM
Re: I'm so sad...need to vent
you can't celebrate theri holiday with them and your holiday with your family?Just because they are strict doens't mean you have to be
swags1016
Posted: Dec 09, 2004 09:59 PM+

Posted: Dec 09, 2004 09:59 PM
Re: I'm so sad...need to vent
Why can't you have a Hannauk bush, as my Mother always called it. When we were little she would decorate our tree in blue and white themes.
Jax430
Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:00 PM+

Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:00 PM
Re: I'm so sad...need to vent
I can't imagine what it would be like to convert and give up the traditions you grew up with. With time, you and DH will develop your own Chanukah family traditions. Here are some
for you!
nenna023
Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:07 PM+

Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:07 PM
Re: I'm so sad...need to vent
Thanks so much. We do go to my sisters house for christmas day but its so sad not having my own tree and knowing that my kids will not grow up with the traditions I loved for the holidays. Thanks for the hugs :)
ellengrisal
Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:16 PM+

Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:16 PM
Re: I'm so sad...need to vent
FM!
cocoa
Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:16 PM+

Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:16 PM
Re: I'm so sad...need to vent
ohhhh, i'm sorry. dh is jewish and although i briefly considered converting, my family and my past and how i celebrate things and go about life are a part of who i am. i'm sorry that you feel that your IL's are so strict. do you live near them or close so that they'd see you decorate? would your dh tell them if you put up some decorations? good luck.
mrswask
Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:23 PM+

Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:23 PM
Re: I'm so sad...need to vent
Please don't take this the wrong way because this is just my opinion but converting is a huge and serious step as I'm sure you know because you went through it. It must be really hard missing Christmas right now and I hope you will still be able to share it with your side of the family but I don't think that having a 'Hanukah bush' or decorating the house for Christmas is the way to go. You made a decision to convert to a new religion and those symbols are not representative of your 'new'religion. You made a very brave decision, one that certainly a lot of us couldn't do - but if you've come this far I think you need to follow through and learn to embrace the customs and traditions of Judaism. I'm sure it's not easy but as I said, I don't think a solution is to continue to decorate for Christmas - you know what I mean? Again - please don't take offense because this is written with love and concern!
prncssrachel
Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:28 PM+

prncssrachel
MEMBER SINCE: 2/03
TOTAL POSTS : 11213
WEDDING DATE: Jul 03, 2005
WEDDING LOCATION: Stewart Manor Country Club
Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:28 PM
Re: I'm so sad...need to vent
I just want to add that I can completely understand how you are feeling and although I have not converted my religion, there are many things I can relate to this issue. I agree that you need to embrace your new religion, but I also think you should do whatever you need to in order to get that 'feel' that you are missing. When it comes down to it, it's not the holiday, but the gatherings and the closeness of the family. Maybe try to include your parents in your new religion and start some new traditions of your own. Every family needs traditions to hold it together, and now would be the best time to start. Hang in there. This is a HUGE change and I know it's hard now, but there's a reason you did it and you need to remember that, too.
luvsbob4603
Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:29 PM+

Posted: Dec 09, 2004 10:29 PM
Re: I'm so sad...need to vent
Posted by nenna023
Ok to make a lone story short I converted to judiasm to be with my now FH b/c his parents are pretty strict and I miss my holidays!!! It is so depressing not having a tree and decorations. I'm in such a depressed mode but I just have to deal with it. But I hate it! xmas is everywhere! Radio, comercials, stores, its so sad and i miss it!!
Ok thanks for listening![]()
Awww Im sorry! here are lots of hugs for you.![]()
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