In response to the wedding being called off...

First, can I just say...after all that last night, I picked up my son from daycare and he has 103, pneumonia and needs a frequent nebulizer (every 4 hours) due to poor oxygen levels!! Ummm hellooooooo!!! Someone needs to let up on me just a teeny bit!!

Anyway, My FH AND I wanted a destination wedding.. We wouldnt mind eloping, but were doing this for my family!! If I had the $$ I would go big, its every girls dream... but I was being REAL!! Whats most important is that we get married, not where or how!

We ALSO wanted to move in together and were looking for quite a while.. When my family freaked about the destination wedding I knew I had to save for a big one.. Thats why were not living together now.

I should have just put my foot down and said, "you know what! This is our wedding and were doing it the way we want!!" But I didnt.. As always, Amy was trying to please everyone.. except FH :(

Of course Im upset only b/c I was dreaming about the JT, my dress etc... but I was also upset b/c if he felt SO strongly about going small I would have gone small... He said I could do what I wanted...

I think its mainly my fault to be honest with you all. I think I was hearing what I was wanting to hear kinda thing....

I really wouldnt mind just going away for a wedding. Maybe we just should... but my whole darn (huge) family would be sooo dissapointed :( Im thinking of just renting a tent and having a pot luck or something.. I could make it GORGEOUS for less than $20,000!!!

Oh yeah.. and he wants to move in and still wants to get married and said this summer is still fine with him... He just didnt like the fact that family kept changing our minds into doing what we never wanted.

Message edited 2/10/2005 7:08:11 PM.

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

Go with what you feel is right. Is he helping you with the plans?...it sounds like you are doing this by yourself! Ask him what he wants before you put a deposit on something else.

I have been thinking about you...I saw your posts earlier in the week or from over the weekend and then I didn't see anything else from you....so I was wondering about you.

I wish you good luck and happiness! I hope it all works out for you!

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

I think that you should do what its best for you and your fiance. This is your day and you need to remember that. I'm pretty sure that watever you decide to do, will be just as beautiful. There is nothing wrong with doing things outside the box and be unique.

From my experience, I also wanted the big wedding since I never had that but me and my husband talked about it and compromised on renewing our vows in mexico, only us and our baby girl. First, my husband wasn't comfortable with the idea of being the center of attention and second, we didn't have to deal with all the drama that entails having both of our families together. I'm very happy with this decision and I'm actually thrilled because it's stress free.

Once again, good luck in any decision that you make.

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

Im so sorry to hear about your son I hope he feels better soon! I really hope that everything works out wonderfully for you no matter what you decide to do!!

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

Oh, I hope your baby feels better.

Hey, there's no reason why you still can't wear the dress you wanted. I say do you.

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

fm

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

I'm so sorry about your son. I hope he feels better really soon.

I think you have a lot throw on you right now and no one has given you the chance to figure out what you really want. I think you need to really think about what you would like. Yes, a big wedding is very expensive. I wouldn't do it again but I am so glad that I did do it. I would have regretted not having the big wedding that I dreamed about since I was a little girl. Please think about what you really, really want. You can't do your wedding day over again.

I don't think it is a big deal to spend the amount of money it costs to have a wedding. If I put it in perspective, most of us will spend that on a new car nowadays.

Remember, you can always make more money but you can't repeat your wedding day so do what YOU want.

What ever you do choose, will be fabulous and wonderful!

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

well I am happy to hear that everything is going good with your FH. I hope your son gets better soon. Everyones right when they say that it is suppose to be your day adn to do what you want. You mentioned that your family had a problem with the destination wedding, and expected a big one, but are they contributing money to make up this difference? If not then I would tell them that its your day, your paying for it, therefore you get to make all of the decisions. If they dont like it then thats too bad, because this is about you and your FH. If its going to cause problems btwn the two of you then its not worth it. Best of luck:)

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

Noone is helping us with ANYTHING.. Not one penny... nothing...I would have the wedding in FMIL backyard but I cant ask her and FH doesnt want to either.. :( THat would save so much $$!!

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

You have to do what is right for the both of you!! Good luck!!!

Oh and... you can definitely do a beautiful intimate wedding here on LI for less than $20K... Don't if I read right, but if you are interested in any ideas, feel free to FM me.

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

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Posted by amy&anthony

Noone is helping us with ANYTHING.. Not one penny... nothing...I would have the wedding in FMIL backyard but I cant ask her and FH doesnt want to either.. :( THat would save so much $$!!

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Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

Hope your son feels better and I think doing a small wedding or even a destanation wedding sounds great Good Luck with everything I know it will turn out fine.

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

I also hope your son feels better.

I wish you the best...

The only thing I can add is that God doesn't give us more than we can handle, at times this seems ridiculous (like now for yu) but it's true...pray, breathe, relax and ask Him to help.

Best wishes!

Re: In response to the wedding being called off...

LISTEN.....don't let your family talk you out of what YOU want. If they truly want to be at your wedding, whether it be destination or not, they will find a way. Do what works for YOU and your family (meaning FH and son).

You can always elope and then do a BIG party for your 1 year...my dad and stepmother did that 10 years ago.

You need to feel that this is what you want, and a BIG, LAVISH wedding isn't every girls dream.....some girls dream of a wedding on a beach or a small intimate affair. This is YOUR time, do what makes you happy